Chapter 56
Pei Zhi was like an infant tasting sweetness for the first time, constantly drawing in the fragrant, delicious liquid. But of course he was not an infant, and it was not as though Xie Ning could really produce anything.
Pei Zhi’s stubborn behavior only left Xie Ning’s skin slightly swollen in one small spot, while spreading even more vivid color across it.
For someone with skin hunger like Xie Ning, this kind of physical contact made him so comfortable that he was beginning to lose his senses. He unconsciously lifted his chin a little, his gaze going hazy and unfocused under the light, clouded by tears. His small, delicate Adam’s apple slid gently, and in search of even more physical contact, he even wrapped his arms back around Pei Zhi’s head.
It looked as though he were initiative leaning into him.
Xie Ning’s initiative always brought out Pei Zhi’s mean streak. Pei Zhi’s breathing grew hurried, and the way he kissed became somewhat excessive. Xie Ning’s brows drew together, and he seemed slightly unhappy. His slender fingers slid into Pei Zhi’s hair and lightly scraped over his scalp in warning.
“Don’t bite,” Xie Ning said between kisses, breathing softly. “Otherwise I won’t let you have any more.”
Xie Ning’s voice was clear and pleasant, naturally carrying a trace of distance, like the faint cool scent of a winter pine forest—clean and refreshing.
But right now his voice was unsteady, the ending of each word trembling helplessly. Forced into that rising tone by the kisses, it carried a sweetness and softness he had never shown before, as though he had already been thoroughly coaxed and softened.
Xie Ning had spent too long suppressing his skin hunger. Now, he was actually letting himself indulge. Though he still often felt shy and hesitant, in most situations he was now willing to face his own needs honestly.
That kind of candor nearly drove Pei Zhi mad.
As he mumbled “okay” over and over, he continued devouring him greedily, like a vicious dog feasting heartily. His kissing looked awful, as though he wanted to swallow Xie Ning whole. The straight bridge of his nose rubbed that bud-like little point all out of place, leaving it trembling slightly in the air, as though it had broken.
In the end, Pei Zhi still failed to restrain himself.
He opened his mouth and bit him.
…
Now Xie Ning was leaning in Pei Zhi’s arms, looking rather sullen, his long lashes lowered. Through his blurred, damp vision, he noticed a small moist patch.
Skin that had once been flawless now bore several teeth marks.
All of them had been left by Pei Zhi.
The one whose skin hunger had just been satisfied was clearly Xie Ning, yet the one who looked full and content was more like Pei Zhi. Pei Zhi held him in his arms, his lips still a little wet, and his handsome brows were full of that deeply fed, satisfied look.
His palm slowly stroked Xie Ning’s back. “Baby is so good.”
His low, hoarse voice carried heavy satisfaction. Spoken so close to his ear, it made Xie Ning’s eardrum itch. Still, Xie Ning’s gaze remained fixed on the slightly swollen skin.
What had once been flat and smooth now looked as though it had sprouted. A little pointed rise stood there, while the surrounding skin had also turned red and swollen, puffing up like jelly and gleaming with a soft, translucent sheen. The circle around it was even worse, spreading out to two or three times its original size.
“Baby?” Pei Zhi ruffled Xie Ning’s hair, making it a little messy, which only made him look even more pitiful and innocent. Pei Zhi himself looked completely satisfied, and in an almost fake show of kindness, he patted Xie Ning’s back. “Is your head still spinning? It’s okay, it’s okay. We’ll take it slow and let you recover.”
By now, Xie Ning had actually already recovered.
It was just that he still did not want to move. His body and mind were both in a sluggish, lazy state. He did not want to do anything, only to rest in Pei Zhi’s arms.
The old Xie Ning would never have been like this.
In the past, he would never have let himself rest. He packed his free time full and kept himself busy almost every moment.
“Pei Zhi…” Xie Ning said hesitantly. “Am I being too indulgent with myself?”
Many times, he felt he should stop, that things should not keep going like this—that endlessly sinking into pleasure was not a good thing. But for someone with skin hunger, physical contact was far too tempting.
He could push Pei Zhi away, or firmly tell him to stop. But he had never once done that. Instead, he let Pei Zhi handle him as he wished, which was another form of self-indulgence.
“No.” Pei Zhi’s heart stirred again at that conflicted, struggling little expression. The way Xie Ning looked now was especially like someone who had done something bad, felt guilty about it, yet still could not stop savoring it. Pei Zhi lowered his head and kissed his forehead, soothing him the way one would soothe a child. “You’re just facing your own needs honestly. Everyone has desires. Satisfying them isn’t something shameful.”
“Is that so?” Xie Ning murmured.
But was he satisfying them too often?
He was very afraid of becoming addicted to something. When he had physical contact with Pei Zhi, he felt intensely comfortable and happy.
Would he become addicted to this kind of contact?
“I feel very honored that your desires can be satisfied by me.” Pei Zhi squeezed Xie Ning’s cheek, slightly distorting his face. “And my desires can only be satisfied by you.”
As he spoke, Pei Zhi casually touched him again, and found his palm once more damp. A thick fragrance spread through the air, and his gaze gathered in his palm. “Baby, you’re really… so sensitive.”
Xie Ning’s brows drew together, and he seemed to glare up at Pei Zhi.
“Not making fun of you,” Pei Zhi said. “How would I dare laugh at you, baby?”
“But I am a little scared, actually.” He held his palm up before Xie Ning’s eyes, and both of their gazes dropped to it. Then Pei Zhi leaned in to whisper something beside Xie Ning’s ear.
Xie Ning froze for a moment, then snapped, “Pei Zhi!”
Before, Pei Zhi had only said these things in his head. But now, he not only thought them—he said them aloud too. And every time, it was more shameless than the last.
“Sorry, baby, don’t be mad, I said the wrong thing.” Pei Zhi took Xie Ning’s hand and pressed it to his own face. “Hit me if you want. I won’t fight back.”
Xie Ning had no hobby of hitting people. Though looking at Pei Zhi’s expression right now… it almost seemed as though Pei Zhi was faintly?? it, like he really wanted to be hit.
Xie Ning neither understood that nor respected it. He lifted his wet lashes and said, “You said you wouldn’t lie to me. But you just lied to me again.”
A soft laugh came from Pei Zhi’s throat. “How did I lie to our baby again?”
“You did.”
“What did I lie about?”
Xie Ning hesitated. “You said you wouldn’t bite, but later you still bit me.”
As he spoke, his lips still bore bite marks and broken skin. Looking rather annoyed, he added, “It even broke the skin.”
This version of Xie Ning was too adorable.
Serious and earnest, discussing this topic with Pei Zhi as though he had not even realized how intimate the subject itself was.
“I really am a bastard.” Pei Zhi sternly condemned himself. Then, coaxing, he said, “Don’t be mad anymore, baby. Next time I won’t bite. Really, I won’t. If I bite again, you can put a muzzle on me—seriously, you should punish me a little so I learn my lesson.”
What kind of person voluntarily asked for that?
Still, Pei Zhi’s attitude in admitting fault was fairly sincere, and Xie Ning accepted it. Besides, what had happened had already happened, and he did, in fact, kind of like it. He wasn’t rejecting it. So he had no intention of continuing to argue with Pei Zhi over it.
Xie Ning fell silent again, curling up in Pei Zhi’s arms. After a moment, perhaps finding the position uncomfortable, he shifted slightly and found a better one.
His soft cheek buried itself in Pei Zhi’s chest, rubbing against it slowly. His long lashes and hair swayed faintly, looking incomparably soft, enough to melt Pei Zhi’s heart as well.
“Sleepy?” Pei Zhi asked in a softer voice while helping clean him with wet wipes. “How about I go to bed with you? I won’t sleep on the floor tonight. I want to hold you.”
Xie Ning lifted his eyelids and looked at Pei Zhi. Earlier, he had wondered at how Pei Zhi had actually resigned himself to sleeping on the floor—it had not felt like Pei Zhi at all.
Now, in the end, Pei Zhi still could not hold back.
Not wanting to speak, Xie Ning answered only with a muffled “mm,” but the way he curled against Pei Zhi was full of dependence.
Because the difference in their sizes was so great, the way Xie Ning curled up made him look even slimmer. Combined with his pale skin, lying in Pei Zhi’s arms, he looked like the milk filling inside a chocolate cookie, giving off a sweet fragrance that made one want to taste him.
“Baby.” Pei Zhi stared at him for a while, then suddenly spoke. When Xie Ning lifted his eyelids again, Pei Zhi whispered, “Can you call me husband?”
Xie Ning: “?”
Without even opening his eyes again, he said, “No.”
That kind of address was too embarrassing.
Pei Zhi hugged his waist and pleaded a little. “Baby, just say it once. Just once.”
“What should I call you?” Xie Ning asked.
“Husband.”
“Mm.”
“……”
Pei Zhi realized at once that he had been tricked. But it didn’t matter. “I called you that,” he said. “So you should call me that too, baby.”
Xie Ning could not even be bothered to open his eyes. He rubbed his cheek against Pei Zhi’s chest and pressed closer, his voice carrying a faint nasal note. “No.”
“All right.” Pei Zhi sounded a little disappointed. “It’s the same if I call you that. Husband, wife, baby, sweetheart…”
Wife’s clearer-headed now. Harder to fool.
I’ll coax him into saying it later, when he’s all muddled again. Then he’ll be all silly and obedient and definitely call me properly.
Xie Ning frowned. “Stop talking.”
“I won’t talk.” Pei Zhi said, “How about a kiss?”
“No.”
“Then your hand?” Pei Zhi retreated to the next best thing. He had kissed enough today already.
Xie Ning thought for a moment, yawned, and said, “That’s okay.”
…
The next day, Xie Ning had to return to school. He needed to go to the studio to organize some drafts.
After dropping him off, Pei Zhi still had to return to the gymnasium for another meeting. He should not have had much left on his schedule, but now that he had newly signed up for this exchange program, he might end up busy again for a while.
Busy or not, that did not stop him from bringing Xie Ning lunch.
“Can I keep bringing you lunch?” Pei Zhi asked.
“Before, you brought me lunch without even asking,” Xie Ning said.
“That was different. Now I’m pursuing you.”
“How does that make it different?”
Xie Ning asked in confusion. Pei Zhi immediately understood that some things did not need to be asked about, and perhaps should not be. He only had to do them consistently. But what concerned him was something else. “Can your classmates see me?”
Then he rephrased. “Can I show up in front of your classmates?”
The way he said it made it sound like some kind of secret affair.
Xie Ning said, “Yes.”
He did not care much about such things. Since he had already decided to see where things went with Pei Zhi, there would not be anyone else. Nor did he care whether other people saw or talked—other people’s opinions meant nothing to him.
Besides, he was no celebrity. There was nothing especially noteworthy about his relationship.
By noon, Xie Ning had just finished part of his work and was about to look at his phone when the window on the door was lightly tapped.
The moment he turned his head, golden sunlight fell straight in, and he saw Pei Zhi standing outside with an insulated lunch container in his hand.
His fingers tapped lightly on the lid, producing a crisp sound. Pei Zhi bent down slightly, his focused gaze and the bright midday sun together landing on Xie Ning. “Baby, did you miss me?”
Xie Ning had no idea how Pei Zhi could ask something so embarrassing so naturally. Pretending he hadn’t heard, he asked, “What’s for lunch?”
“Xie Ning, answer me.”
Pei Zhi reached through and held Xie Ning’s chin. Lowering his body even more, taking advantage of the fact that the studio was nearly empty, he bent down without restraint and covered Xie Ning’s lips with his, giving them a simple suck and lick. Amid the mingled, disordered sounds of their breathing, he asked again, “Did you miss me? I missed you so much. I kept thinking about you. No matter what I was doing, I was thinking about you. You filled my whole head.”
Not a word of that was exaggerated.
Every time Pei Zhi was separated from Xie Ning, he immediately began missing him. And that longing never eased with time or because he threw himself into work. On the contrary, the less he could see Xie Ning, the more he missed him.
He simply had no way to get used to not seeing him.
Xie Ning was completely the opposite. Once he immersed himself in something, he was wholly focused. But today had indeed been different.
In the past, when he finished working, he would not immediately look at his phone. Instead, he would empty his mind for a while and reset. Recently, though, he had found himself checking it almost by instinct. And just as expected, the screen would be full of messages from Pei Zhi.
Like an emperor reviewing memorials, Xie Ning would go through Pei Zhi’s messages one by one, then reply.
Now, under Pei Zhi’s hot, expectant gaze, Xie Ning said, “I missed you too.”
A look of deep satisfaction appeared on Pei Zhi’s face. “Move back a little.”
Xie Ning shifted slightly to the side, and Pei Zhi set the insulated container on the desk, then lightly flipped himself in.
After making sure once again that there was no one else in the studio, Pei Zhi stretched out his arms and hugged Xie Ning face-to-face.
He was like some giant dog, burying his face in the side of Xie Ning’s neck and breathing him in over and over. A whole day’s worth of exhaustion and longing vanished at once, transforming into something fiercer.
“I made today’s lunch myself,” Pei Zhi said. “Try it. I think it turned out pretty well.”
Xie Ning looked surprised. “Weren’t you discussing the exchange with your coach today?”
“After the meeting, I still had some free time. You hadn’t answered my messages, so I knew you must still be busy. If I’d shown up in front of you then, I’d only have interrupted you and distracted you. I didn’t have anything else to do, so I borrowed a nearby restaurant kitchen and made a few dishes.”
He made it sound simple, but the dishes looked especially delicious—full of color, scent, and flavor, and even the plating had clearly been done with care.
“Have you actually taken cooking classes?” Xie Ning asked.
“What?”
“Cooking. Plating. Things like that. You look pretty skilled. It seems like you cook often.”
“Have some soup first, warm up a little. It’s very nourishing, especially good in winter.” Pei Zhi poured Xie Ning a bowl of soup. “I wouldn’t say I cook often. But yes, I did learn.”
“Hard to imagine Young Master Pei would actually go out of his way to learn cooking,” Xie Ning said.
“I had no choice,” Pei Zhi replied. “If I want to make my wife happy, I have to learn a little bit of everything.”
Xie Ning looked at him with a clear I’ll just watch you perform expression, but Pei Zhi only got even more into it.
“Isn’t there a saying,” he continued, “that if you want to win a man’s heart, you first have to win his stomach? Baby, hurry and try it—see whether I can win over your stomach.”
Xie Ning had heard sayings like that too, but only as sayings. Hearing them come out of Pei Zhi’s mouth gave them a strange kind of absurdity.
Because Pei Zhi didn’t need to rely on any of this to win people over.
And yet, he still did it.
Pei Zhi picked out the crab meat for him. “Try this rock lobster. I made it baked with cheese. It was flown in this morning—very fresh.”
Xie Ning opened his mouth and was fed a bite.
The fresh lobster meat was firm and tender. Sweet juices burst against his teeth, and the smooth texture came wrapped in the rich fragrance of cheese and lobster. The flavor was mellow, dense, and delicious.
Xie Ning’s cheeks puffed slightly from the bite. He ate neatly, pressing his lips together afterward in a way that made him look oddly cute.
Pei Zhi reached out and poked his cheek, earning himself a dissatisfied glance. “How is it?”
After swallowing, Xie Ning said, “It’s good.”
Then he added, “Looks like your plan is going very smoothly.”
“What plan?”
“Winning over my stomach.”
As they were halfway through lunch, a few more people returned to the studio. The moment they saw the two of them together in such obvious intimacy, they froze in stunned silence.
Pei Zhi was personally feeding Xie Ning bite by bite. Xie Ning sat by the window like some beautiful doll, doing little more than opening his mouth now and then to be fed, quiet the rest of the time.
Pei Zhi, on the other hand, had been talking the entire time, and kept calling him things like “baby.”
Neither of the two paid any attention to the others. The newcomers quietly slipped back to their own workstations. Even though they knew this had nothing to do with them, the urge to gossip was too strong, and they kept twisting around to sneak glances, observing every little thing the two of them did.
Pei Zhi picked up a piece of eggplant and moved to feed it to Xie Ning, but this time Xie Ning didn’t open his mouth. Instead, he frowned and gave Pei Zhi a calm, slightly cool look.
“Are you full?” Pei Zhi asked.
“No.”
“Baby, open up. I’ll feed you.”
“No.”
“Did I do something to upset you?” Pei Zhi didn’t even get the chance to properly reflect before apologizing. “I’m sorry, baby. I shouldn’t have upset you.”
“That’s not it.” Xie Ning stared at the eggplant with utmost seriousness. “I hate eggplant.”
He had always thought of himself as not being picky, but in reality there were quite a few things he disliked. He just usually avoided ordering foods he didn’t like, which had given him the false impression that he was easy to feed and not picky at all.
Pei Zhi looked as though he had never expected this answer, and froze for several seconds.
Then Xie Ning suddenly felt his cheek being pinched. He looked at Pei Zhi in confusion.
Pei Zhi’s cold, handsome face was lit with laughter. One finger hooked lightly beneath his chin.
“Fussy.”
But with that gentle tone and expression, there was not the slightest trace of blame in it. If anything, it almost sounded encouraging.
Coaxing him, Pei Zhi said, “Then I won’t make eggplant anymore.”
“Mm,” Xie Ning answered.
Pei Zhi finished the eggplant himself. With the disliked dish gone from sight, Xie Ning’s mood visibly improved, and the rest of the feeding process went very smoothly.
When Pei Zhi got up to leave, he tidied the table clean, then—as though doing a magic trick—produced several adhesive heat packs from his pocket.
“Stick these on when you go out later. It’s cold outside.” Then he pulled out another packet of wet wipes and carefully cleaned Xie Ning’s mouth and fingers. “What do you want for dinner? How about hot pot?”
“Hot pot is fine,” Xie Ning said. “Then let’s do hot pot.”
Pei Zhi hooked a finger under a strand of hair and tucked it behind Xie Ning’s ear. In a quiet voice, he said, “Wait for me to come pick you up.”
After Pei Zhi left, the studio remained silent.
Xie Ning decided to rest for a while and put his head down on the desk.
Still, no one said anything.
Everyone had the exact same indescribable expression.
None of them knew how to put it into words. Today’s Pei Zhi was so unlike the Pei Zhi they knew. His aura was still cold and forceful, but… strangely, he also had the feel of a peacock showing off?
Nothing like his old aloof, untouchable self. Now it was as though every strand of hair on his head had been carefully arranged. He looked especially like some male animal in a nature documentary, dressing itself up with extreme seriousness in order to attract a mate.
Driving off rivals while luring in his chosen partner, all to secure the right to mate.
And then there was the way he fussed around Xie Ning—careful, attentive, practically “domestic.” He fed him bite by bite and even coaxed him from time to time. Even fathers coaxing small children to eat wouldn’t usually go this far.
They were truly stunned.
It was their first time seeing… such a shamelessly devoted Pei Zhi.
But then their eyes drifted back to Xie Ning’s face, bathed in sunlight, and their minds wavered again.
If it was Xie Ning, then somehow… they understood.
When Xie Ning woke up from his nap, there was a stranger sitting nearby.
He had a vague impression of the person—his name seemed to be… Fan Qian? A senior one year above him.
But that wasn’t Fan Qian’s seat.
Seeing that Xie Ning was awake, Fan Qian handed over a milk tea. “You’re up? Perfect timing. It hasn’t been delivered long. I recently won a prize in the xx competition and got a bonus, so I bought milk tea for everyone.”
“You’re the only one who hasn’t had yours yet.”
Xie Ning glanced around. There was indeed a cup of milk tea on every desk, so Fan Qian really had bought one for everyone.
“Try it?” Fan Qian said. “This milk tea shop is really good. It’s super popular online.”
“No, thanks. I don’t drink milk tea,” Xie Ning replied.
And he certainly would not casually drink something handed to him by a near-stranger.
The rejection was exactly what Fan Qian had expected.
“Ah.” He didn’t seem to mind. Setting the cup on the desk, he leaned closer. “Really, just give me a chance.”
Xie Ning looked at him. “A chance for what?”
“Lately you and Pei Zhi have been getting pretty close. He’s pursuing you, right? Looking at how attentive he is, he’s definitely chasing you.” Fan Qian lowered his voice, making sure no one else could hear. “And since you aren’t rejecting him, that means you’re gay. If you are too, then… why not consider me too?”
“I’m good-looking enough, and I’m romantic and have money. I’m no worse than him.”
Xie Ning’s beautiful face remained completely devoid of expression. His tone was flat. “No. I’m not interested.”
“So ruthless?”
The Xie Ning sitting here now looked completely different from the Xie Ning from earlier. Fan Qian remembered how cold-faced yet obedient Xie Ning had looked just now, and something in him itched.
“Being pursued is just being pursued. Don’t reject me so quickly.” Fan Qian continued, “Besides, you wouldn’t be losing anything. If I pursue you, I’ll do it properly—gifts and surprises won’t be lacking. It’s fine if you don’t accept right away. Just leave me hanging a while. Let me chase you, that’s enough.”
“There’s no need,” Xie Ning said.
His attitude was very cold.
And yet, compared to how Xie Ning usually rejected people, this was already unexpectedly gentle.
Xie Ning had always had a cold temperament, and he had many admirers. He usually rejected them quickly and decisively. Compared with those earlier rejections, the way he rejected Fan Qian now could practically be called “gentle.”
Fan Qian was frustrated. “Pei Zhi can chase you, but I can’t?”
“You can chase me too,” Xie Ning replied. “I’ll still reject you.”
Fan Qian fell silent for a moment, then looked suddenly horrified. “So Pei Zhi really is chasing you? And you haven’t rejected him?”
Damn.
How had that guy gotten so lucky?
