Chapter 55
Because he had just climbed more than ten flights of stairs, Pei Zhi’s breathing was fast and his body was hot. There was a light sheen of sweat on his face. Even though he had tried to be careful, a little of it still got onto Xie Ning’s face.
Xie Ning frowned slightly, a little disgusted, and quietly pulled back a bit. “You’re covered in sweat.”
“Did you miss me?” Pei Zhi ignored that and kept pressing, “Baby, did you miss me?”
“I missed you so much. I was thinking about you the whole way here. How could I miss you this much… What about you? Baby, did you miss me?”
Xie Ning could not withstand the way Pei Zhi kept asking, especially since Pei Zhi was also rubbing all over him. In the end he could only say, “I did.”
The moment he said it, the roots of his ears warmed, and even his lashes trembled. He turned his head aside, his tone and expression deliberately cool. “Go take a shower first. Don’t hug me.”
“You dislike me?” Pei Zhi especially loved it when Xie Ning showed this sort of slightly disdainful expression. It was simply too cute. He pinched the point of Xie Ning’s chin and lowered his head to suck at his lips. “It’s all my fault. I got our little baby dirty. I’ll go shower right now. I definitely won’t stay dirty and cling to our Baby Ning.”
The door closed again.
Xie Ning went to the kitchen and poured two glasses of water. “The bathroom is over there. As for pajamas, I don’t have your size, but mine are pretty loose. You should be able to wear them for now.”
After saying that, Xie Ning fell into thought.
He compared his own build to Pei Zhi’s.
Alright. “Barely” was putting it mildly. The height difference was one thing, but Pei Zhi’s shoulders and chest were far broader than his. Xie Ning made a perfectly timed little joke: “If not, you can just go without.”
The apartment was warm enough. If he turned the temperature up a little more, Pei Zhi would not get cold anyway.
Pei Zhi answered readily, “Okay, then I won’t wear anything.”
Then he asked, in a deliberately restrained and “shy” tone, “No underwear either?”
Xie Ning’s brows drew together. Looking thoroughly astonished, he cut off the line of thought at once. “Pei Zhi, you’re not allowed to think weird things again.”
“I’m not thinking anything. I just don’t have underwear to wear,” Pei Zhi explained.
“I already called a delivery runner. Your underwear and sleepwear will be here soon.” Xie Ning said. “Now you can go take your shower.”
By the time Pei Zhi finished showering, the building staff had more or less arrived. But Pei Zhi just stood there without moving.
“What is it?” Xie Ning asked.
Pei Zhi looked absurdly delighted. “You know what size I wear.”
Xie Ning: “……”
He genuinely did not understand why Pei Zhi looked so thrilled.
Wasn’t that obvious at a glance?
Xie Ning studied fashion design. And besides, he and Pei Zhi had been intimate enough that everything that should and should not have been seen had already been seen. As long as he had even a little basic life knowledge, of course he would know what size Pei Zhi wore.
But Xie Ning didn’t correct him. Pei Zhi seemed very happy, simply because Xie Ning knew his size. Perhaps to Pei Zhi, this was proof that Xie Ning paid special attention to him.
Even if there was a small misunderstanding buried inside it, Xie Ning did not mind letting that beautiful misunderstanding continue.
Pei Zhi showered very thoroughly. He had been taught good hygiene since childhood and already had good habits, but on top of that, because of Xie Ning’s cleanliness issues, he was always afraid Xie Ning would?? him—wouldn’t let him hold him, or kiss him. So when it came to washing up and all related things, he was especially meticulous.
He was afraid Xie Ning would stop wanting to be close to him.
Now he had basically finished. Standing in front of the mirror, Pei Zhi examined himself seriously. Broad shoulders, a narrow waist, tight clean muscle lines, clearly defined abs, and distinct V-lines.
Lately, whenever Xie Ning had class and Pei Zhi did not, he had been going to a personal trainer for targeted workouts.
The results were good.
Would Xie Ning like them?
Still, the more Pei Zhi examined his reflection, the more dissatisfied he became. For example, could his abs be a little more defined? Could his V-lines look a bit sexier?
He scrutinized his body from every angle with impossibly harsh standards, then moved on to his face and hair.
Pei Zhi, who wanted to appear before Xie Ning in the most perfect state possible, suddenly felt a little anxious.
He blow-dried his hair and tried to recall the hairstyle tutorial videos he had seen online.
Great.
At the time he had just skimmed past them, and now he had forgotten everything. Too late for regret.
And since he had not brought his phone into the bathroom, he could not check anything.
He tried running his fingers through his hair, styling it from memory. The tutorial had gone like this, right?
There came a knock at the door.
Xie Ning stood outside with a set of newly opened pajamas draped over his arm, while the underwear was still sealed in the bag. “The clothes have arrived. Should I just leave them outside the door and let you pick them up when you come out? Or should I hand them to you now?”
Pei Zhi’s eyes darted over his reflection in the mirror.
His image was decent enough now, right?
Xie Ning should like it… right?
Pei Zhi turned on the faucet and splashed some water onto his face and body, creating a kind of just-showered damp, hazy atmosphere. Under the soft blur of that look, the whole mood felt elevated.
His confidence returned immediately, and he walked toward the door.
The door opened just a crack, and a pale, soft hand slowly reached in through the gap. Xie Ning held the pajamas in that hand, and the dark fabric made his skin look even whiter.
Pei Zhi stared at it for a moment, throat going dry. Just as he was about to reach out, catch Xie Ning’s wrist, and yank him inside, the cool voice came from outside.
“Don’t get water on me.” Xie Ning said. “You’re not allowed to make me wet.”
Pei Zhi struggled silently while staring at Xie Ning’s hand.
The door was only opened a tiny amount, and Xie Ning clearly had no intention of coming inside. He was obviously guarding against him.
And Pei Zhi’s thoughts were impure. He had already imagined things far too excessive—like suddenly dragging Xie Ning in and kissing him hard, then slowly stripping off the sleepwear Xie Ning had just put on. A hot, steamy bathroom naturally gave rise to suggestive fantasies, and he was no exception.
But how had Xie Ning known?
Every time Pei Zhi wanted to do something bad, Xie Ning always seemed to spot his intentions before he even showed the slightest sign, and would refuse coldly before the idea could even take shape.
It was almost as if Xie Ning really had telepathy.
Pei Zhi nearly laughed at himself for the thought. How could telepathy exist in real life? Superpowers only existed in imagination and movies.
“Pei Zhi?” Xie Ning called again from outside.
Pei Zhi took the sleepwear and the plastic bag. “Thanks, baby. I’ll get dressed right away. Wait for me.”
Xie Ning answered with an “Mm.”
He did not have to wait long. Pei Zhi came out soon after, already dressed, and immediately hugged Xie Ning from the front. The two of them moved together toward the floor-to-ceiling window.
Outside, the snowfall was growing heavier.
Holding Xie Ning tightly, Pei Zhi said, “This is the first snow we’ve watched together.”
“Mm.” In truth, Xie Ning was already a little sleepy. Especially because Pei Zhi’s embrace made him feel almost intoxicated with comfort. He tilted his head and asked, “Are you sleeping in the guest room later?”
“No. I said I’d sleep on the sofa or the floor. I can’t go back on my word.”
Xie Ning: “……”
He said, “Alright then.”
Although he did not understand what exactly Pei Zhi was insisting on, if Pei Zhi did not want to sleep in the bed, he was not going to force him.
The two of them stood together by the top-floor window, looking out at the snow, wrapped around each other in a clingy, tangled way. Xie Ning had half expected Pei Zhi to become unruly again, especially with how lively his inner thoughts usually were.
But unexpectedly, Pei Zhi had been very obedient tonight.
He merely held Xie Ning tightly, and while doing so, took Xie Ning’s hand and rubbed it over and over, then every so often brought it to his lips for a small sucking kiss. At worst, he would lift Xie Ning’s chin and steal a deep kiss.
Other than that, he did not actually do anything especially outrageous.
After one deep kiss, Xie Ning’s lashes had already gone damp. Leaning against Pei Zhi’s chest, he breathed in short little pants. His full, reddened lips shone with moisture, and the scented breath slipping from them seemed almost like a little cloud hanging around Pei Zhi’s vision.
“Baby…” Pei Zhi called in a hoarse voice.
Xie Ning raised his eyes slowly and cast him a light glance.
[What do I do, what do I do, I’m getting hard again.]
[I really want to sleep with my wife…]
[No, I have to endure it. I promised wife I’d sleep on the floor or sofa. I have to keep my word. I can’t trick wife.]
[But I really want to hold wife while sleeping. Wife is so soft and fragrant in my arms… stop thinking.]
[Stop thinking, stop thinking.]
Pei Zhi was looking at him with a direct, hungry gaze—one that seemed to say that if Xie Ning just nodded, he would immediately pounce and swallow him whole.
Pei Zhi had assumed Xie Ning would pick up on what he wanted, or at least offer him an excuse out. After all, Xie Ning was soft-hearted and polite. Surely he would think it rude to make someone sleep on the sofa or the floor, and since Pei Zhi himself refused the guest room—
then Xie Ning would invite him into the bed.
It was a lovely fantasy.
In reality, Xie Ning didn’t think that much about it at all.
He simply treated it as one of Pei Zhi’s quirks. If Pei Zhi wanted to sleep somewhere odd, then he could. If he wanted to fuss, then he could fuss.
Xie Ning said, “Then sleep on the sofa. It’s big enough; you’ll fit. I’m tired, I’m going to bed.”
He yawned slowly, a mist of water gathering in his eyes. “Check the storage room for blankets and pillows. There are spare ones in there.”
So he really was being made to sleep on the sofa?
Watching Xie Ning about to leave, Pei Zhi panicked. “Baby, the sofa is too far away from you. Then let me sleep on the floor in your room.”
Xie Ning got up and cast him a glance. “Do whatever you want. I’m going to sleep.”
Pei Zhi went to the storage room and deliberately picked the thinnest bedding he could find. After laying out the floor bedding, he heard rustling from the bed. Xie Ning turned to one side and switched off the light.
The night was quiet. Pei Zhi could hear everything happening beside him with perfect clarity—the faint sounds of Xie Ning burrowing into the blankets, and the tiny sniff he made once.
Maybe it was also because the distance between them was too small.
Seeing that things had finally gone quiet on Xie Ning’s side, Pei Zhi began to grow restless.
At first, his thoughts had really been simple: he only wanted to stay over at Xie Ning’s place. As long as he could stay under the same roof, and as long as he could see him, that was enough.
But people really were greedy.
Now that he was actually in Xie Ning’s home, Pei Zhi was no longer satisfied.
The apartment was spotless, and traces of Xie Ning’s life were everywhere. Staying in this space, it felt as though he was surrounded completely by Xie Ning’s scent.
He wanted so badly, so desperately, to do something more.
[Wife, wife? Are you asleep?]
[Is wife already asleep? Then if I quietly climb into bed, would wife notice? No. Can’t do that. Wife would be angry.]
[I have to listen to wife.]
[Then what if I quietly climb up, hold wife while sleeping, and quietly tear wife’s sleepwear apart too, and while wife is sleeping deeply, slowly push inside—would wife maybe just think it was sleep paralysis, or a nightmare, and not even realize the next morning?]
[And the next morning, when wife wakes up and sees the belly a little swollen, confused and pressing at it, maybe it’ll feel just like wetting the bed. Then seeing me beside you, would wife slap me angrily?]
[Stop thinking, Pei Zhi.]
[But wife getting angry and hitting me would definitely be hot too.]
Xie Ning: “……”
He had almost fallen asleep again, but Pei Zhi’s overactive inner monologue woke him up.
This was getting ridiculous. Why was it that the only inner thoughts he could hear were all explicit, restricted-content material?
Xie Ning could understand that being in a flirty ambiguous phase naturally led to fantasy. But for him, the person involved, to hear all those details so clearly and specifically was a little too much.
“Pei Zhi.” Xie Ning interrupted, his voice light but very helpless. “Aren’t you sleeping?”
“I am.”
Then he asked, “Did I wake you up?”
“A little.”
But Pei Zhi had not even moved around. He had not made any noise at all. He had just been lying there quietly, staring into the dark. How had that managed to wake Xie Ning?
Could it be that he had been breathing too loudly?
Pei Zhi apologized immediately. “Sorry. I’ll be quieter, baby. Did I wake you up?”
Half of Xie Ning’s face was buried in the blankets. He gave a muffled “Mm.”
So cute.
Hearing his voice, Pei Zhi’s lips curved up slightly. He soothed him softly, “I won’t wake you up anymore… but baby, my blanket is so thin. I’m so cold…”
Before he had even finished, Xie Ning tossed him the remote.
“Adjust the temperature yourself. I’m going to sleep.”
Then he added a warning: “Don’t make noise.”
Pei Zhi did not dare make another sound. He only regretted, deeply, why he had insisted on acting reserved and gentlemanly in the first place. He was nothing of the sort.
And now look what happened. No chance of sleeping with Xie Ning in his arms.
All he could do was spread his bedding by Xie Ning’s bed, not even able to see Xie Ning’s hand.
At last, Pei Zhi made up his mind. Quietly, he climbed up to the side of the bed, reached his hand beneath the warm blanket, and took hold of Xie Ning’s hand.
Xie Ning: “?”
In a small voice, Pei Zhi said, “Wife, I’m a little scared of the dark.”
“I’m not your wife.”
“Baby.”
“Not your baby either.”
The exchange was so childish that both of them laughed at once.
“Then who else would you be?” Pei Zhi asked, inching closer. “Can I hold your hand while I sleep? It’s so dark down here, and I’m scared.”
Unless Xie Ning were a fool, he would never believe Pei Zhi was actually afraid of the dark.
Being disturbed like this, Xie Ning lost any remaining drowsiness. He turned slightly and asked in confusion, “Hold my hand while you sleep?”
How exactly was that supposed to work?
Even if he moved to the edge of the bed, how could Pei Zhi possibly lie there comfortably and hold his hand while sleeping? Just picturing it made Xie Ning feel awkward, no matter who the other person was.
“Baby, move a little closer,” Pei Zhi said.
Xie Ning moved closer.
“Like this.” Pei Zhi said. “Then I can hold your hand while I sleep.”
Xie Ning still didn’t understand.
Then suddenly he felt a force tugging at him, and he was dragged straight off the bed and fell into Pei Zhi’s arms.
Pei Zhi’s body was burning hot, and the heat that enveloped him made Xie Ning’s mind blank for a second. Then he grit his teeth. “Pei Zhi, you tricked me again!”
“Again?” Pei Zhi let out a quiet laugh. “How is it ‘again’?”
Xie Ning lay against him, his lower back pinned down. He could barely move, so he tipped his chin up slightly and said, “How few times have you tricked me?”
“When?” Pei Zhi asked.
“You know perfectly well.”
“For example? Baby, I’m really innocent here.”
“For example…” Xie Ning paused, then continued, “You told me to stick my tongue out.”
Pei Zhi froze for a second, then laughed softly from his throat.
That was true. He really did enjoy taking advantage of those moments when Xie Ning’s mind was foggy, coaxing him into overly shameless things—things Xie Ning would probably never agree to if he were fully clear-headed.
“Baby, that doesn’t count as tricking you.” Pei Zhi lifted his head and kissed the point of Xie Ning’s chin. The anxious edge from earlier was gone now, replaced by a kind of lazy satisfaction. “I thought that was called flirting.”
Xie Ning said nothing. Bracing his hand against Pei Zhi’s chest, he said, “I’m going back to sleep.”
“Before that, can I have a goodnight kiss?” Pei Zhi asked pitifully. “I had a meeting today. Coach said we’ll be leaving for Jingzhou in two days, and the tickets are already booked. I want to be close to you a little more, okay? Baby…”
He buried his face in Xie Ning’s neck, his voice turning low and hoarse. “Wife.”
Xie Ning: “If I kiss you once, then you’ll sleep?”
“I promise. One kiss, then I’ll sleep. I definitely won’t wake you.”
Promises in this area had no credibility whatsoever. But Pei Zhi kept rubbing against him, and they were both young adults in the thick of an ambiguous, heated phase. It was very easy to start entertaining the wrong ideas late at night.
Almost helplessly, Xie Ning thought that the reason Pei Zhi had been able to “break his word” so many times was partly because of his own indulgence. If he truly didn’t want something, Pei Zhi would never have managed to coax him into it over and over.
In the end, it came down to this: he did like a little indulgence. He enjoyed this kind of release. Even if some of the methods were… beyond what he had ever imagined.
Forget it. It was only one kiss.
And besides, had he not refused Pei Zhi both a good morning kiss and a goodnight kiss last time?
Xie Ning didn’t know why Pei Zhi wanted those things so much. But in the end, he lowered his head slowly, planning to place a simple kiss on Pei Zhi’s cheek.
The kiss had been meant for his cheek.
But the moment it was about to land, Pei Zhi suddenly turned his head, and the kiss missed its target and landed on Pei Zhi’s lips instead.
The instant their lips touched, Xie Ning froze. Just as he was about to pull away, a large hand clamped around the back of his head and pressed him back in.
Pei Zhi tilted his chin up a little, following the line of the touch as he slowly rubbed against Xie Ning’s lips. He took the soft mouth between his own and carefully licked through the wet inner heat, making sticky, wet sounds.
His tongue churned inside Xie Ning’s mouth and sucked greedily, seizing every drop of saliva. His way of kissing was messy and ravenous, like a wolf finally tasting raw meat, a wild gleam bright in his eyes.
Xie Ning had not prepared himself for a real kiss at all. The suddenness of it stunned him for a second. Not only did he fail to close his mouth in time, he actually parted his lips more. Pei Zhi’s tongue slid along his upper palate, then rolled up his tongue and sucked it, dragging it out slowly and thoroughly. The whole mouth went weak and numb.
“Don’t…” Pei Zhi kissed a little too hard and bit a spot of tender flesh. He had bitten the same place on the Ferris wheel earlier, too. Mist filled Xie Ning’s eyes and his lashes trembled as if frightened. “Don’t kiss me—mm! Pei Zhi, my mouth… ah… it’s sore.”
The sentence was not long, but Xie Ning had to break it into several pieces to get it out. When Pei Zhi heard that he was really uncomfortable, he finally let him go little by little.
It made sense. Earlier today he had practically eaten Xie Ning’s mouth inside out. Of course it would be sore.
Pei Zhi sat up and held Xie Ning by the waist. The dazed expression had returned to Xie Ning’s face; he clearly had not fully recovered from the kiss.
The V-neck sleep top had slipped to one side, revealing most of his chest and one side of his collarbone. Beneath it, a faintly flushed little patch of color—so pale, so clean—showed under the skin.
Like Xie Ning himself, the color was light. But because Pei Zhi had lavished so much “attention” on it, it had now become a richer pink. The shape was small and neat, translucent like a bit of soft jelly.
The air filled with the sound of a predator swallowing.
Watching it, Pei Zhi’s gaze almost seemed to catch fire. In a hoarse voice he asked, “Since your mouth hurts, how about I kiss somewhere else instead?”
He cradled the back of Xie Ning’s head, tipped up his face, and rubbed their noses together. Coaxingly, he said, “Baby, let me kiss you.”
Xie Ning genuinely liked this kind of touch—close, intimate, and deeply comforting. It might have been the effect of his skin hunger too. He generally understood what Pei Zhi was doing, and understood their conversation, but his mind kept processing it all one step slower than normal.
“Where do you mean?”
…
In certain matters, Pei Zhi really did seem to have a talent far beyond ordinary people’s.
He had recognized immediately that this sleep top looked especially good on Xie Ning, and because the neckline was quite low, it hung very loosely on his slender frame.
It draped over him. The collar really was rather wide, and because Xie Ning’s shoulders weren’t broad, it slipped even more easily.
Normally it might have been fine. But as soon as Xie Ning moved too much, the collar shifted off to one side, exposing half a shoulder and chest.
And now it had indeed slipped down, baring most of one snowy arm and half his chest. The rest of him remained covered, but the exposed skin could hardly be seen clearly, because most of it was blocked by Pei Zhi’s lowered head.
Perhaps the room was too warm. Xie Ning was flushed all over. He tipped his head back a little and his delicate throat moved slowly. His beautiful face and body had both been steamed to an enticing pink by the heat.
His reddened lips stayed parted as he breathed. A little helplessly, he rested his hands on Pei Zhi’s head. The moment he looked down, he could see Pei Zhi’s hair shifting with every movement.
Pei Zhi was buried there, entirely focused. He looked so serious that it was almost like he was concentrating on some difficult academic problem. Or like a baby drinking milk, determined and intent, sucking at a bottle with complete dedication, as if afraid someone might steal it.
In short, at this moment, nothing in the world could distract him.
Pei Zhi really loved kissing Xie Ning. Lowering his head, he kissed him carefully, and then all at once looked up at him.
Their gazes collided in the ambiguous lighting, and Xie Ning suddenly felt… deeply strange.
His whole body was pale and clean, but now it looked as though heat had dyed every inch of him with a soft wash of pink. And one point in particular stood out sharply, colored as if a ripe berry had burst there, red and tender, the surface shining with a thin wet gloss.
Its original color had not been like this. But after all of Pei Zhi’s “careful treatment,” it now looked vividly overworked. Xie Ning’s skin was so delicate that the change was especially obvious. The tiny central point was as swollen and red as the little bead of his lower lip after too much kissing, and all around it bloomed a blurred ring of flushed color.
Pei Zhi stared for a moment, then lowered his head again and kissed him there deeply.
His way of kissing had always been rough. He licked and bit, and sometimes even trapped the flesh between his teeth and ground against it.
Xie Ning could not stand that kind of kissing. His toes curled tightly, and the strangeness of it almost made him want to escape. But every time he tried to push Pei Zhi away, Pei Zhi bit down a little harder out of sheer badness. Knowing how thin-skinned he was, he even made exaggerated wet sucking sounds on purpose.
“So sweet, baby.”
Xie Ning looked down blankly and saw the black sleep top on the other side suddenly arch upward in a highly noticeable curve, the outline of a hand clear beneath it. In his dazed gaze, that small reddened spot was being pressed into by Pei Zhi’s coarse fingers, the flesh dimpling under the pressure into a little shadow.
Then, right in front of Xie Ning’s eyes, Pei Zhi even scraped a fingernail lightly across it.
Xie Ning could not help but let out a soft little sound. After taking two shaky breaths, the sweet warm breath spilled from his lips onto Pei Zhi’s skin. His lips were immediately licked again, hard. He grabbed blindly at Pei Zhi’s shoulder, leaving pale red fingernail marks there.
It did not hurt. If anything, it only made things itch in a more dangerous way.
Pei Zhi lowered his head again and kissed that same spot. It was already a bit swollen, but that did not save it from more of his attention.
“So pitiful.” Pei Zhi gently pinched the reddened tip with his fingers, his eyes full of tenderness, though his mouth remained merciless. “It’s swollen a full circle bigger than before.”
Xie Ning’s lips were the same. They had already been kissed into a swollen pout, the bead of his lower lip fuller than ever, as though it had been ripened and fed until one more lick might squeeze out something sweet and wet.
Xie Ning looked down at him, nearly blank-eyed, while Pei Zhi reached out his tongue and licked away the saliva that had gathered obscenely at the corner of his mouth. His tone was almost puzzled.
“Will it make milk?”
The cold, beautiful face was washed in a thin red glow, and confusion lingered damply in his eyes. It took Xie Ning a long while to process what Pei Zhi had actually said, and even then, his expression remained dazed.
What?
He was a man. How could he possibly…?
“It definitely will, won’t it?” Pei Zhi rubbed at him again, kissed him like he was something precious, and spoke in a hoarse voice. “Even if it doesn’t now, if your husband helps your little baby enough, then it will later.”
“And then what will you do? Baby still has classes. Are you going to have to keep tissues tucked inside all day, otherwise your clothes will get soaked?”
“Maybe later it’ll build up more and more. You’ll definitely panic and try to squeeze it out by yourself alone in the dorm. But what’s the use? Your hands are so weak, you’d never get anything out no matter how long you tried. In the end, you’d still need me to suck it out for you.”
The way Pei Zhi described it almost made it sound plausible.
Xie Ning’s damp lashes fluttered down, brushing over the reddened spot that had visibly spread wider. Before it had only been the size of a fingernail. Now it really did seem swollen a whole ring larger.
As though, just like Pei Zhi said, if he helped enough, then maybe…
A look close to panic and helplessness appeared in the already damp red around his eyes.
Could that… really happen to him?
