Chapter 24
Pei Zhi saw the surprise in Xie Ning’s expression. It seemed he had not expected him to say something like that.
Xie Ning’s eyes were mesmerizing. They were no longer carrying that tipsy haze from before; now they were filled with genuine drunkenness, along with just the right amount of confusion.
That dazed innocence gave him an indescribably moving charm. Pei Zhi stared blankly into Xie Ning’s eyes, maintaining eye contact all the way until the movie screen went dark.
Pei Zhi asked, “Can I?”
Xie Ning said, “Can what?”
Pei Zhi said, “Touch you.”
“If you keep touching, will you get used to being touched?” Xie Ning asked. “Would that actually work?”
Pei Zhi said, “How would we know if we don’t try?”
Xie Ning had looked into the condition Pei Zhi was talking about before. One of its treatments was very similar to what he was doing right now.
The first kind was fear of touch, so the treatment was to keep increasing physical contact until desensitization happened. But for him, it was craving touch while not wanting touch, so the method was to use normal social interaction, enjoy and experience the comfort brought by skin contact, and this also required sustained and sufficient contact with the other person until the symptoms eased.
Pei Zhi mistakenly thought he had a fear of physical contact, so he wanted to use intimate contact to help him overcome it… What Pei Zhi did not know was that what he really had was skin hunger syndrome, a condition that made him impatient for intimate contact.
This misunderstanding was actually quite good.
It made it possible for the two of them to increase physical contact in a reasonable way, and at the same time it let Xie Ning achieve his own goal. More importantly, Pei Zhi would never find out about the skin hunger syndrome.
The aftereffects of the alcohol surged up. His eyes blurred with tears, making even Pei Zhi’s expression hard to see clearly. His full lips parted slightly, and moisture gathered in his eyes. “Alright,” Xie Ning said. “Then let’s try.”
His thick lashes trembled delicately as he asked, “Where do you want to touch first?”
Xie Ning tipped his chin up a little. The sweet scent of fruit liquor drifted from his lips as he exhaled. Then he added, “If there’s no effect, I’ll leave a bad review.”
Pei Zhi asked, “Out of how many? Five stars?”
Xie Ning said, “Mm.”
A broad hand slowly came up to Xie Ning’s face, the thumb rubbing softly around his lips.
A tingling sensation spread from the edge of his mouth. Xie Ning parted his lips a little, wanting to speak, but he did not dare move too much, afraid that Pei Zhi’s finger might slip into his mouth.
“Will you hate it?”
“No.”
“What if it were someone else?”
This time, Xie Ning fell silent. He frowned, and a restrained trace of rejection flashed across his brows.
That subtle shift in expression inexplicably pleased Pei Zhi. It seemed to mean that in Xie Ning’s eyes, he was someone special, that he held a position and weight greater than anyone else’s.
His breathing grew hurried. The alcohol burned in his lower abdomen, and the heat spread through all his limbs and bones.
That large hand gently stroked Xie Ning’s face. Pei Zhi observed his expression and asked, “Mr. Xie Ning, please rate my service.”
“…” Xie Ning said, “Two points.”
Pei Zhi gave a low “Mm.” “Looks like I still need to keep trying harder and take better care of my beautiful patient.”
Xie Ning’s face heated. “You…”
Pei Zhi said, “Me?”
Xie Ning said, “Stop talking like that.”
It really sounded strange.
Like they were playing some kind of bizarre roleplay.
Pei Zhi said, “Alright. I won’t talk like that.”
Even though he did not know exactly which part of how he was speaking Xie Ning disliked, he knew that just going along with Xie Ning was always the safest choice.
Pei Zhi was a very perceptive person. He had vaguely realized that Xie Ning seemed to really like this kind of touch. Whether it was what they were doing now, or simpler things like holding hands and hugging, Xie Ning liked all of it.
This was slightly different from the condition Pei Zhi had looked up, but he did not think too deeply about it. He was not a real doctor, after all, and he had no way of knowing Xie Ning’s exact circumstances.
Pei Zhi only knew that if Xie Ning liked it, then he would do it. If Xie Ning liked being touched like this, then he would do his best to “serve” him properly.
And when he saw Xie Ning show something close to satisfaction, Pei Zhi himself would also feel an overwhelming sense of fulfillment.
The large hand stroked that soft cheek with careful gentleness. Faint light fell across Xie Ning’s face, illuminating his flushed skin.
The fingers slid down the line of his jaw. When they reached his earlobe, Xie Ning shivered softly.
Thumb and forefinger came together, lightly rubbing that round little earlobe. Its pearl-like sheen, as though someone had licked it open, revealed a tender layer of reddened flesh.
Pei Zhi asked, “This level… is okay too?”
With that serious tone, he really did sound like a doctor treating a patient.
Pei Zhi was fully immersed in the role. “The ears are a relatively sensitive area. If you can get used to being touched here, that means you can probably also accept being touched elsewhere—Xie Ning, don’t bite your lip.”
The corners of Xie Ning’s eyes turned bright red, clouded with hot physiological tears. His porcelain-white skin carried a faint wash of pink, and every inch of him radiated temptation.
Xie Ning’s ears really were very sensitive, but more than sensitivity, what he felt was pleasure.
For someone with skin hunger syndrome, touching a sensitive area stacked pleasure on top of pleasure.
His earlobe was being kneaded lightly, and Xie Ning could not help curling his knees, his heels rubbing weakly against the bed. He felt as though he could not breathe, desperately wanting to bite something. The moment he bit his lip, Pei Zhi stopped him.
Xie Ning lifted his damp lashes in confusion. His lashes were clumped together by tears, making him look especially fragile.
Even drunk, Xie Ning remained restrained and careful, his body slightly curled. As he moved unconsciously in his struggle, the hem of his shirt lifted a little, revealing a narrow strip of waist—very slender.
His collarbones and face were both red, the redness drawn out by the alcohol. They felt hot to the touch too, and carried a rich, elegant fragrance.
The effects of the alcohol and the sensations brought by skin hunger syndrome layered over one another, pushing Xie Ning into a dazed state. He wanted more without realizing it, yet he was confused by Pei Zhi’s sudden pause.
His eyes glittering with tears, he looked at Pei Zhi in a haze. “Why did you stop touching?”
“Keep going.”
It sounded almost like an order.
His cool voice had been coated in drunkenness, and the lengthened ending carried a husky softness. It was not loud, yet when it fell into Pei Zhi’s ears, it felt deafening, like a direct blow to his chest.
It felt as though something were charging wildly inside his chest. Pei Zhi’s heartbeat became absurdly fast, and a loud buzzing filled his ears.
Clearly Xie Ning was the tipsy one, but in that moment, Pei Zhi was the one who felt truly out of his mind.
Fuck…
Why was he this hot?
Even though he was only touching Xie Ning’s face and earlobes, Xie Ning’s threshold was not high. For him, this level of touch was already more than enough.
His face was flushed, his eyes were wet and red, and the corners of his eyes tilted up lazily, like a cat basking in the sun.
Pei Zhi pretended to stay calm and said very flatly, “Mm. I’m touching you now.”
Pei Zhi gripped Xie Ning’s chin. Rough fingers gently stroked over those red, soft lips, pressing them back and forth until the lower lip was parted too much, revealing a glimpse of white teeth.
His eyes darkened a little. He rubbed hard at Xie Ning’s lower lip, the somewhat rough force making Xie Ning frown and let out a soft sound.
“…Will you hate it?”
“It’s alright.”
In a hoarse voice, Pei Zhi asked, “What about this time? How many points? Did I pass?”
“Mm…” Xie Ning, like a cat overdosed on catnip, answered hazily, “Three points?”
“Looks like this level of contact still isn’t enough,” Pei Zhi said. “We should move on to more in-depth contact.”
Xie Ning blinked slowly and opened his eyes a beat too late. His lashes trembled softly.
More in-depth… contact?
[I want to touch wife’s waist so badly… it’s so thin.]
[But I don’t dare. T-T]
[I can mouth off all I want in my head, but wife is precious. I can’t touch him carelessly. And wife is drunk right now too, so I definitely can’t take advantage of him.]
[But I really want to touch… forget it, I’ll just massage wife’s feet instead. Help him relax a little. That’s at least a reasonable excuse.]
[Hehe, touching wife’s little feet now.]
On the surface, Pei Zhi sounded assertive, but in reality he only dared fantasize about Xie Ning’s waist in his head. If he really had to touch it, he chickened out.
At most, he only dared touch Xie Ning’s hands and feet. He told himself it would count as a foot massage, which at least gave him a legitimate excuse.
But when the moment came to actually touch Xie Ning’s feet, Pei Zhi hesitated all over again. Those small, beautiful white feet were lying there like works of art, and when he looked at his own hands, they seemed rough and dark by comparison.
He was almost afraid that touching them would dirty them.
Pei Zhi suddenly snapped back to himself. What exactly was he afraid of?
Usually he was not this timid. So why did he turn into a lion with its teeth removed whenever he was in front of Xie Ning, fierce-looking on the outside but useless in practice?
Xie Ning had closed his eyes and seemed about to fall asleep. Pei Zhi gritted his teeth, turned his head, grabbed the bottle, and tilted back half of it in one go.
High-proof liquor poured down like water. The alcohol shot straight to his head, making his vision spin for a moment. Then he turned back, his dark gaze heated and fixed on Xie Ning’s face.
Pei Zhi deliberately put on a forceful air, trying to look cool and domineering, but his fingers trembled faintly as he slowly reached out toward Xie Ning.
Xie Ning was pulled into his arms, and his ankle was seized. That broad hand rubbed down over the smooth top of his foot, massaging its way lower.
Those fair feet were entirely different from Pei Zhi’s, which were covered in thin calluses from years of training. The tops of Xie Ning’s feet were smooth and fine, pale and clean, with only his toes showing a healthy pink.
Pei Zhi began giving Xie Ning a foot massage, the strength neither too light nor too heavy. The scorching heat of his palms brushed against the flesh, stirring up a fine tingling sensation.
Those tiny electric currents flowed like warm spring water through Xie Ning’s bones, bringing a gentle yet steady warmth.
Xie Ning was practically draped all over Pei Zhi now, the tip of his nose brushing lightly against Pei Zhi’s chest, tears clinging to his lashes. He looked like a small animal relying on Pei Zhi with its whole body.
His slightly bent legs were pale and straight. As Pei Zhi massaged his feet, he could clearly see Xie Ning’s calves tensing hard. His toes curled tightly, then slowly spread open again, his feet lifting faintly at the tips in unmistakable enjoyment.
A layer of pink had spread across his moist skin, the same shade as his toes.
Xie Ning’s face grew redder and redder. Sweat formed on his forehead, making the air hotter and wetter. His glossy lips parted as he panted, and damp hair clung to his temples.
His eyes had become watery, as though even his awareness were beginning to drift.
It felt too good…
In a daze, Xie Ning lowered his gaze and watched as his sole was enclosed in Pei Zhi’s broad hand and massaged. Strong-boned fingers kneaded across the top of his foot, rubbing the pale skin into mottled pink.
He looked confused. Then suddenly, his shoulders jolted, and he could not help grabbing onto Pei Zhi’s arm.
The sole of his foot was lifted higher. At first, Pei Zhi had massaged him rather slowly, but later the rhythm and strength both increased. He had been observing and analyzing all along, trying to figure out exactly what kind of touch made Xie Ning feel even better and shiver even harder.
Once Pei Zhi found the right threshold, he stayed within that range and sped up, giving Xie Ning no chance at all to come back to his senses.
Pei Zhi’s way of touching was deeply marked by his own personality. More than caressing, it felt like invading. With his deep, handsome features and predatory intensity, he looked like a hunter stalking prey, leaving Xie Ning no room to escape.
Xie Ning let out a low, involuntary gasp. This style of massage was simply too intense, too enjoyable to bear.
He tried to pry Pei Zhi’s hand away, but he could not even keep his own balance, let alone resist the comfort that was swallowing him whole. A rare expression of embarrassment and helpless panic surfaced on his cool face.
Xie Ning’s voice suddenly rose. “Pei Zhi!”
Clutching him tightly, Pei Zhi panted out, “You can’t handle this level of contact?”
It was not that he could not handle it. It was just… Pei Zhi had gone too far.
This pause finally gave Xie Ning a chance to recover a little. “Is this what you meant by in-depth contact? Touching my feet?”
“Mm,” Pei Zhi said. “It’s enough.”
What did he mean, enough?
Xie Ning did not quite understand.
[I don’t dare touch anywhere else. Touching your feet is enough.]
Pei Zhi did not dare touch too much. At most, he only dared touch Xie Ning’s hands and feet. It did not feel like enough, yet somehow it also felt more than enough. As long as it was Xie Ning, then maybe any amount would do.
“Do you want to continue?” Pei Zhi asked. “If you don’t like it, we can stop now. If you don’t say anything, I’ll assume you can accept it.”
Xie Ning pressed his lips together. His fine brows were full of struggle.
His rational mind told him he should not keep going. But the positive feedback his body was getting from the skin hunger syndrome made it very difficult for him to say no.
Above his head came Pei Zhi’s hoarse voice. “I’ll take that as agreement.”
Rather than caressing, Pei Zhi seemed to be invading. His gaze was sharp and predatory, and his large hand locked firmly around Xie Ning’s foot.
The strength of Pei Zhi’s massage was perfectly measured, but the energy coming off him was aggressive and scorching.
A drop of sweat slid from his jaw and landed at Xie Ning’s temple. It made no sound, yet felt incredibly loud, leaving behind a wet gleam like a tear trail.
As Pei Zhi massaged his feet, the thin calluses made Xie Ning itch, but even more overwhelming was the satisfaction flooding in from his skin hunger syndrome. Xie Ning’s mind became increasingly hazy. His hands unconsciously tightened around Pei Zhi’s arm, those bud-like fingertips pressing into the darker flesh.
Eventually, Xie Ning turned his head, about to bite down on his own finger—only for Pei Zhi to stop him.
Pei Zhi pressed Xie Ning’s head to his shoulder. With his other hand, he touched Xie Ning’s lower lip, rubbing it gently. “Don’t bite yourself. Bite my shoulder.”
His gaze dropped to Xie Ning’s mouth. “Your lips are all red.”
Even in his alcohol haze, there was no way Xie Ning could actually make himself bite down.
His eyes had turned red at the corners, wet with physiological tears.
“Xie Ning. Lift your head and look at me.”
In confusion, Xie Ning lifted his damp lashes. Pei Zhi lowered his head and asked, almost as if puzzled, “Did we close the door properly? What if someone suddenly barges in and finds us here?”
“Wh-what?” Xie Ning froze. After several seconds, he asked blankly, “Then what should we do?”
They were just here to watch a movie. It was not like they were doing anything bad. So what would it matter if someone found them?
Pei Zhi could tell that Xie Ning really was not very clear-headed now… Was it only because of the alcohol? Or because of the touching too?
If it was the touching, then Xie Ning was far too sensitive.
Pei Zhi’s thumb rubbed lightly over Xie Ning’s ankle bone as he coaxed, “If someone finds us, then hide in my arms.”
“Anyway, no one will know who we are.”
Pei Zhi held Xie Ning’s foot in his hand, his palms now covered in a layer of hot sweat, making wet, slippery sounds as they rubbed against the sole.
Just as Xie Ning was about to lower his head and look away, Pei Zhi’s fingers tightened firmly around his foot. “Xie Ning, watch my hand.”
Xie Ning was practically forced to look at Pei Zhi’s hand—or rather, forced to look at his own foot being played with.
He endured and endured, but finally, as if he had hit his limit, Xie Ning buried his face in Pei Zhi’s shoulder and bit down.
He bit rather hard, lacking control. From that alone, it was obvious that his emotions really were on the verge of collapse.
The pain in his shoulder should have brought discomfort, but instead Pei Zhi’s adrenaline shot to an astonishing level.
Then suddenly, something warm and wet touched his shoulder, like rain putting out the small flame that had just ignited.
Pei Zhi froze for a full ten seconds.
“Xie Ning, you…” Pei Zhi lifted Xie Ning’s face in surprise. With his free hand, he touched the corner of Xie Ning’s eye and found it wet and hot. He paused. “Are you crying?”
Pei Zhi was shocked. Xie Ning really was crying. His flushed face was covered in tears, and the tip of his nose had been rubbed red too.
He ought to have apologized, or felt sympathy. After all, making Xie Ning cry had not been his intention. He had only wanted to massage his feet.
But right now, another unfamiliar emotion completely engulfed him.
Pei Zhi gazed at Xie Ning’s face with near-obsession.
Those beautiful eyes were soaked in tears, making them look even more crystalline. His long lashes had clumped into several damp bunches, and tears still hung at the ends of his reddened eyes, as if ready to fall at any moment.
Pei Zhi’s finger rubbed at the corner of Xie Ning’s eye, and he could feel clearly that Xie Ning seemed a little frightened and uneasy, turning his head away with a faint tremble, unwilling to look at him.
This pitiful, disheveled Xie Ning only made Pei Zhi feel even more worked up.
[Wife looks so pitiful when he cries, but so beautiful.]
[I want to lick all of wife’s tears away so badly. But that would scare wife, right? Wife would think I’m a pervert. No, can’t do that…]
Pei Zhi pulled Xie Ning into his arms and patted his back gently while Xie Ning shivered slightly from the skin hunger syndrome.
Suddenly, Pei Zhi desperately wanted to take out his phone and photograph Xie Ning as he was now, face soaked with tears.
Don’t. That’s too disgusting. Pei Zhi viciously cursed himself. But when his eyes landed on Xie Ning’s overly gorgeous face, he still could not help being dazed.
Because he really was so beautiful…
When Xie Ning was held, his waist dipped slightly, slender enough to fit under one arm, soft as though he had no bones. His waist was narrow and his legs were long, and yet all the places that should have had flesh had it, his figure perfect beyond reproach.
Pei Zhi carefully wiped away Xie Ning’s tears. That palm-sized face was cradled in his hands, and he was terrified of wiping too hard and hurting him.
Xie Ning lowered his eyes and turned his head away, his full red lips pressed together slightly, as if he felt ashamed.
He had actually cried because of something like this… even though he knew it was because of the skin hunger syndrome.
“It’s my fault, all my fault. I didn’t control my strength. Did I hurt you?” Pei Zhi took the blame, even though he knew perfectly well that this was not really pain. He coaxed softly, “It’s okay. No one saw except me.”
“I won’t tell anyone.” Pei Zhi paused, then lifted Xie Ning’s face gently with his fingers. Lowering his head, he rubbed the tip of his nose against Xie Ning’s and said in a low voice, “You look so beautiful when you cry.”
Xie Ning had already been ashamed enough, but hearing this sort of comforting tone from Pei Zhi made his face burn even hotter. That porcelain-white skin was washed with a thin layer of pink, making him seem irresistibly inviting without doing anything at all.
Like a big dog, Pei Zhi kept nuzzling against Xie Ning’s face. Not getting any response, he sounded a little aggrieved. “Why won’t you answer me?”
“Pei Zhi.” Xie Ning’s voice was hoarse. “I don’t want to talk right now.”
Pei Zhi said, “Alright. Then I won’t talk either.”
At moments like this, Pei Zhi really did become obedient, none of the ferocity from earlier left in him.
He wiped Xie Ning’s tears clean, though the redness at the corners of his eyes still remained, leaving evidence that he had cried.
One hand kept patting his back while the other rubbed the back of his head in silent comfort.
Xie Ning’s mind was still not very clear. It was easy to get sleepy when a person was slightly drunk. Leaning on Pei Zhi’s shoulder, he said lazily, “Shouldn’t we just go back and sleep? Though it still seems kind of early…”
It was not even nine yet. And yet Pei Zhi said, “I’m sleepy too, actually.”
Xie Ning braced one hand on the bed, trying to get down.
“Don’t move. I’ll put your shoes on.” Pei Zhi set him down on the edge of the bed, picked up the shoes from the side, knelt on one knee in front of him, and caught hold of Xie Ning’s ankle to help him put them on.
Pei Zhi’s movements were a bit clumsy. While helping with the shoes, he accidentally brushed the sole of Xie Ning’s foot. The sole was sensitive, and with his skin hunger syndrome on top of that, Xie Ning could not help letting out a soft sound.
He instinctively recoiled and lightly stepped against Pei Zhi’s chest with his foot.
This time it was Pei Zhi’s turn to grunt.
The atmosphere turned awkward in an instant. Just as Xie Ning tried to pull his foot back, Pei Zhi caught it and pressed it back again, this time forcing it against his chest with more weight.
Pei Zhi said, “Why are you pulling away?”
“I’m sorry. I really didn’t mean to.” Xie Ning said awkwardly. “Did it hurt?”
“With that little strength of yours…” Pei Zhi’s tone was hard to read. Then he changed the subject and tied Xie Ning’s shoelaces into a neat bow.
Still kneeling on one knee, Pei Zhi remained where he was, while Xie Ning sat on the edge of the bed, his stunning face still carrying that faint flush.
At this moment, quite inappropriately, Pei Zhi thought again of how Xie Ning had looked when he cried.
Xie Ning did not make a sound when he cried. He only endured the choking feeling and let the tears fall silently. His cool, elegant face had been drenched in vibrant color, tears slipping down out of control, even his lips reddened from being pressed together…
Xie Ning was just about to get off the bed when Pei Zhi planted a hand beside him. Looking up at him, Pei Zhi said, “What do I do?”
“Suddenly I kind of want to kiss you.”
Xie Ning froze for a second.
Pei Zhi added, “Or… could you kiss me once? As payment for the ‘treatment.’”
Xie Ning thought, he ought to give some kind of payment.
After all, Pei Zhi really had made him feel very good just now—much better than during the earlier hugs. But… bringing up payment at a time like this, did Pei Zhi really not think it was strange?
Xie Ning said, “Friends don’t kiss each other.”
Pei Zhi said, “In the West there’s the hand-kiss etiquette, and cheek kisses.”
Xie Ning leaned in a little. Still carrying some drunkenness, he bent closer and examined Pei Zhi’s face carefully. His features were sharp and three-dimensional, and his face really did not have the kind of bone structure typical of Asians.
He asked, “Are you Western?”
The sudden closeness made Pei Zhi’s breath catch. His Adam’s apple slid. “Maybe one of my ancestors had Western blood.”
Xie Ning smiled. Their faces were very close, so close that Pei Zhi could see every trace of that smile with stunning clarity.
Then Xie Ning lightly patted Pei Zhi’s face. “Go to sleep early. I’m tired.”
Pei Zhi wiped his hands with a wet wipe. “Should I carry you back?”
Xie Ning said, “Mm.”
He did not really want to walk anyway.
Pei Zhi, who had just been shameless enough to ask for a kiss, became instantly, overwhelmingly satisfied after receiving only that simple caress.
