Chapter 5
…What “like” or “don’t like,” “cute” or “not cute”…
The corner of Shang Che’s mouth twitched. He wasn’t sure if he felt more speechlessness or helplessness, and he couldn’t even be bothered to evaluate the cotton doll’s whimsical, outrageous claims.
A headache began to throb faintly. Shang Che’s brow furrowed sharply, his gaze sinking involuntarily as a deep obscurity filled his eyes.
He reached out to lift the fallen “giant.” The tense muscles of his arm passed through the cotton doll’s line of sight, and soon after, that briefly used 80-centimeter “body” leaned against the display cabinet, gazing back at the cotton doll in silence.
The cotton doll stared silently at its other self, then raised its clear, featureless face toward Shang Che. A unmistakable trace of reluctance and regret flickered in its big eyes, and even the small, cat-like corners of its upward-curving mouth seemed to droop slightly.
Suddenly, a pair of broad, slender hands lightly covered its pitiful gaze.
Cotton Doll: (* o . o *)?
Its hesitant voice carried clear confusion and bewilderment: “Human…?”
Shang Che’s fingertips curled slightly. He quickly clenched his hand into a fist and hid it behind his back, his movements bearing a barely noticeable trace of fluster. He didn’t know why he had engaged in an action that could only be described as foolish and childish. He could only turn his face slightly to the side, his tone stiff: “…Stop staring around with those alarmingly huge eyes.”
He paused, his voice turning somewhat low as he continued, “And stop always saying weird things.”
Whether they were provocative or… anything else.
The cotton doll didn’t understand what “weird things” meant. Its simple, pure-cotton brain couldn’t process such complex and roundabout expressions, so it simply assumed the human was praising its eyes for being big.
But the human’s eyes are very big too—they can fit a whole Cotton inside!
Shang Che could feel a gaze sizing him up from below. The cotton doll seemed eager to observe the differences between humans and itself, its eyes darting back and forth carefully, looking at the human in front of it one moment, and at its 80-centimeter self the next.
Above the human’s eyes were two dark, fluffy things, but Cotton didn’t have those.
Below the human’s eyes was a raised, tall part with two tiny, tiny holes, which Cotton didn’t have either.
The human’s mouth looked so big and had thickness, whereas Cotton only had a thread embroidered on…
And why wasn’t it round under the human’s mouth?
…Was it because a human was a human, and a cotton doll was a cotton doll?
The cotton doll lay flat against Shang Che’s calf, pressing a soft little hand against its round cheek, looking for all the world like it was genuinely pondering this profound question.
Within a few seconds, however, its attention was captured by something else—
The human’s eyes moved! And they were so bright! It liked them!
Cotton liked shiny things!
Shang Che’s eyes were slender and long, the outer corners tilting upward with a hint of wildness that highlighted his unrestrained, youthful aura. His pupils weren’t a pure black, but flared with a faint shade of amber that looked like a pair of brilliant, glowing gems under the warm white light strips—completely different from the cotton doll’s clean, oval golden eyes.
The cotton doll watched with absolute absorption, even leaning its soft little body forward unconsciously to get closer and see more clearly, having entirely forgotten Shang Che’s earlier “warning.”
Shang Che felt completely uncomfortable under the cotton doll’s unreserved, unwavering gaze.
That featherlight look carried no actual physical temperature or emotion, yet more than anyone else’s gaze, it made him feel a strange sense of exposure and an indescribable bashfulness.
The cotton doll’s eyes were too large—so large that at this moment, Shang Che could barely tell where it was looking specifically or where its focus lay. His breathing slowed down without him realizing it.
It was as if every inch of skin and every expression on his face were being “observed”—or perhaps “learned”—in the most primitive, pure manner by this little creature composed of cotton and fabric.
The sensation of the cotton doll against his calf grew clearer and clearer, to the point where even the touch of that tiny button on its shirt pressing against his shin bone felt distinctly sharp.
“…Hey.” Shang Che felt that his capacity for acceptance was already quite high, but he still couldn’t stand being stared at like this by a cotton doll. He couldn’t help speaking up to break the eerie atmosphere, an awkwardness in his voice that he hadn’t even noticed himself: “Have you looked enough?”
Hearing his voice, the cotton doll blinked its golden eyes slowly.
“…Not staring around…” Its answer was a bit hesitant, as if it were pondering its choice of words. “Human’s face… is different from Cotton’s…”
That’s complete nonsense. How could they possibly be the same?
Shang Che couldn’t help but complain internally. His headache, however, had eased quite a bit due to this little interlude, and a wave of drowsiness gradually began to wash over him.
The amount of information he had processed today was too vast, and the level of chaos was too high. He genuinely needed time to digest it all instead of standing here talking nonsense with a cotton doll.
Even though his previous attempt to fall asleep had already failed once.
He offered a perfunctory, disgruntled reply: “We humans all look like this.”
…? Do humans all look the same? Every single cotton doll looks different!
Humans… are way too pitiful.
Shang Che suddenly realized that the look the cotton doll was giving him seemed to carry a tiny sliver of indescribable… pity?
Immediately after, the cotton doll’s soft, squishy voice of comfort sounded: “Human, you look pretty!”
Shang Che went silent for a second before instructing it, “…Don’t say weird things like that.”
The cotton doll paid him no mind, continuing in a novel and excited tone, “You have two dark… fluffy things, and two little holes!”
Although the description was strange and hard to comprehend, Shang Che still understood: “…Those are eyebrows and a nose.”
Yet what the cotton doll liked most were still the things between the eyebrows and the nose. It switched its expression with natural ease, its golden eyes curving into squinted slits while its tiny round mouth parted slightly.
(^o^): “Human’s eyes… look the prettiest!”
“So shiny! Cotton likes them!”
Shang Che: “…” It truly hadn’t listened to a single word he said.
Cotton Doll: “So shiny! Cotton likes them! The round ball… glows! Cotton likes it!”
…What shiny thing… what glowing round ball…
There had been more than enough absurdity and farce for one day. He didn’t want to debate shiny objects with a lump of cotton any longer. Severe sleep deprivation was driving his sanity to the brink of collapse; he desperately needed peace and rest.
“…You stay here for now,” Shang Che cut off any further conversation in time. His expressionless face appeared somewhat cold, but the undeniable exhaustion in his eyes betrayed him. “You are not allowed to come out without my permission. No moving around, and no making any noise.”
With that, Shang Che stood up. A passing arc of light glided across his indifferent face. His footsteps carried a rush and floatiness as he turned and left without a shred of hesitation. The strip lights automatically dimmed a few seconds after the door closed.
“…”
The cotton doll’s mouth parted slightly. Before the sentence “Human, where are you going?” could even leave its mouth, it could only stare blankly at his departing back and that unfeeling door.
The moment the light abruptly dimmed, the cotton doll’s body shuddered almost imperceptibly. It felt as though it had returned to the sensation of being shrouded by the trash bag.
Darkness, Cotton hates it… Human too…
It instinctively pouted, its expression looking quite miserable: T^T.
The cotton doll could only comfort itself silently. Once its eyes adjusted, the glowing round ball would become the only source of light in the room again, and Cotton would be able to see the shiny thing once more.
If the snow globe could come alive, it would probably discover a round head directly beneath its line of sight, stubbornly tilted upward, staring straight at it—only to droop again a moment later in dejection.
The cotton doll looked quite dull and lonely right now.
Sure enough, this human still didn’t like it. Even though it was using this 40-centimeter body, human still didn’t like it…
But human seemed very tired. Was Cotton being too noisy…?
Pairing its soft little round hands together, the cotton doll lowered its head. It stopped speaking and moving, as if instantly stripped of all “life,” turning back into a genuine, silent plush toy.
Human doesn’t like Cotton…
It’s okay…
Cotton is just… a little bit sad…
Click.
The door lock clicked softly. Shang Che had returned, holding something in his hand.
The strip lights in the storage room lit up once more. The cotton doll raised its head a bit faster this time, appearing quite excited, its voice carrying an uncertain anticipation: “Human…”
Shang Che merely glanced at it casually from the corner of his eye.
His face was devoid of expression—flat and calm. In silence, he shook out the blanket in his hands, smoothing it flat on the floor. After pressing his palm against it to test its softness, he lifted the lonely cotton doll without a word and set it onto the soft blanket.
Dropping one knee to the floor, Shang Che reached out to rescue the two smaller cotton dolls still stuffed in the trash bag, placing them gently onto the blanket so the three of them could be together. He even grabbed the 80-centimeter big guy leaning against the cabinet with one arm, pulling it onto the warm blanket as well.
Having done all this, he paused for a moment, his gaze sweeping over the four cotton dolls of varying sizes that shared the exact same face. Sitting together on the soft blanket now, they looked… identical to how they were a few hours ago.
In truth, a cotton doll had no concept or feeling regarding heat or cold. It only knew that it could see things, move around, and feel certain emotions—either its own or the human’s. Everything else was unknown and blurry.
The cotton doll moved its tiny feet restlessly, its golden eyes closely tracking Shang Che’s movements as light sparked within them once more: “Human!”
“Alright, quiet.” Shang Che pressed his knuckles against his temples, which were throbbing from lack of sleep. A faint trace of moisture remained on his lips. “We’ll talk about whatever it is tomorrow.”
He reached out his arm. After a second of hesitation, his hand retrieved the crystal-clear, softly glowing snow globe from the display shelf, setting it gently in front of the cotton doll.
The snowflakes inside the snow globe swirled about due to the movement, and the blurry little figure in the center was smiling toward the cotton doll.
Looking at the cotton doll whose eyes instantly turned into stars at the sight of the snow globe, Shang Che’s tone remained flat, yet combined with his gentle actions, it inexplicably seemed as though he were awkwardly comforting it: “…Is the ‘glowing round ball’ you mentioned this thing?”
Shang Che’s neck and shoulders ached with a faint, sour soreness from exhaustion. His brain, severely deprived of sleep, felt hazy under the combined impact of a surreal shock and the soothing effect of medication. His hand supporting him on the floor trembled slightly. He shook his head almost imperceptibly, his voice dry: “Be good… I…”
“Cotton will be good!” The cotton doll interrupted him eagerly, staring at the fresh item before it with intense excitement, then tilting its head with a face full of curiosity. “Human, what is this called?”
“…Snow globe.” Shang Che answered in a very low voice, his gaze toward the snow globe obscure and nostalgic.
Having received its answer, the cotton doll stared intently at the snow globe once more, as if it could never get enough. It couldn’t help raising a hand, wanting to touch it: ( ???).
“Be careful, don’t break it—” The words blurted out of Shang Che’s mouth almost urgently, before he suddenly froze. His nerves had actually been wound so tight that he thought a doll made of cotton could break a snow globe.
The cotton doll’s hand paused, looking at this “backtracking” human with confusion and tentativeness.
Shang Che’s gaze fell on the snow globe, dimming unconsciously for a brief moment as if convincing himself: “…Forget it.”
This time, his departing steps were a bit slower, and his motion in closing the door was much gentler. His finger casually swiped over a certain button, casting a warm glow that enfolded that tiny patch of space on the blanket.
…Forget it… what does that mean? Does it mean human is allowing it to touch the shiny thing?
The cotton doll engaged in some deeply serious thinking, then happily extended its round little hand to touch the surface of the round ball. It raised its head, looking at the closed door, then at the shiny round ball before it, and finally at the fluffy blanket beneath its bottom.
Human isn’t here—if it moves secretly, it won’t be caught!
Cotton is so smart!
Besides, human seems very nervous about this thing. Since he’s not here, as Cotton, it has to protect it well for him!
Mm! Cotton is super awesome!
It shuffled its bottom forward and gently hugged the glowing round ball, resting its cheek obediently against it like it had obtained a cherished treasure, protecting it with utmost care:
“Human said… this is called a snow globe…”
