Chapter 4: Huo Dashan
Ssssh—
The hose suddenly changed direction, and the stream of water gushing out instantly splashed all over the man’s face.
The force of the water was so strong that the spray falling past his ears formed a small artificial rainbow in the sunlight.
“Ahhh! Not this! Not this!”
“Help! Somebody save me!!”
The man shook his head left and right, desperately dodging the stream of water, yet stubbornly refused to let go of the hose in his hand.
He even leaned in closer to it.
An Yi: …
Was he trying to drown himself with a hose?
An Yi stood there dumbstruck.
He did not understand it, but he was deeply shocked.
For a moment, he was completely stunned. Was this what a world even richer than that of ordinary rich people looked like?
Sure enough, this was not a world a little frog like him could take part in. The truly wealthy really did play differently.
And in just a few short seconds, An Yi was faced with a question.
Should he go help, or not…
Why was this guy crying for help but still refusing to put down the hose?
Could it be that this was exactly the feeling he wanted?
But if that was the case, did this not count as self-harm?
An Yi could not just stand by and watch. He put down his luggage, adjusted the large water bottle hanging from his neck, and prepared to go over. But before he could move, something else reacted even faster.
Nearby, the two Dobermans that had been happily romping around the lawn, playing a game of “come chase me if you can,” immediately turned their heads when they heard the commotion.
The moment they saw Huo Beixing being dominated by the hose, they barked loudly.
“Woof! Woof!”
Then they sprinted toward the hose connection for the sprinkler, ten meters away.
An Yi’s mouth dropped open. “Oh ho!”
What smart dogs.
The Dobermans were sleek and shiny black all over, and when they ran, their bodies were swift and powerful. Their teeth were sharp, and their bite force was extremely strong. Researchers described Dobermans as highly intelligent, strong-willed, and fiercely aggressive dogs, which also made them especially suitable for military training.
Watching the two Dobermans dash over at top speed, it was obvious they were trying to pull out the hose where it connected to the sprinkler.
It was simply too moving.
An Yi wiped at the tears that did not exist at the corners of his eyes. He was willing to include this act in the “Top One Hundred Touching Moments in China.”
At the same time, he clenched his fists excitedly in support of them.
Within seconds, one Doberman reached the hose first, lowered its head, bit down on the connection, and twisted hard.
It worked!
At that moment, An Yi was every bit as excited as the time he had gone into the mountains to dig wild vegetables and accidentally unearthed a radish!
Although afterward he had discovered it belonged to a rabbit’s burrow and had returned it.
An Yi turned to look at the man.
But the stream shooting from the hose showed no sign of getting smaller.
Instead… instead it got even stronger.
An Yi: …
He had thought it would be timely help in a snowstorm, but instead it was adding frost to the snow.
Just then, from a hundred meters away, a figure suddenly charged over, racing toward them at what felt like two hundred miles an hour.
“Young master, your old servant is here!”
With one clean, decisive move, the figure rushed up and slapped the hose straight out of the man’s hand.
Smack!
Huo Beixing, who had been bullied by the evil water force, finally saw the light of day again. He stood on safe and solid land, breathing in fresh air freely.
Huo Beixing stood there with his mouth slightly open. Water droplets still trickled down his handsome, sharply defined face, and his bare upper body was also covered in rivulets of water that slid down along the lines of his muscles.
If one ignored the slightly vacant look in his eyes, he looked as though he were in the middle of a magazine photo shoot.
Extremely stylish.
Huo Beixing took a deep breath.
That had really been terrifying.
He had almost died.
He had only wanted a drink of water. Who would have thought the hose did not want to let him drink and had even tried to kill him instead?
How stingy.
Huo Beixing felt a little wronged, and immediately made up his mind.
From now on, he would never play with hoses again!
Then he turned to look at the older man with an innocent face and gave him a silly grin. “Uncle Zhong, thank goodness you were here. I’m never playing with hoses again.”
Butler Zhong replied, “It is good that young master is alright.”
Master and servant were deeply moved, while at their feet the hose that had been knocked away continued to thrash wildly like a golden snake dancing in frenzy. The daisies that had not gotten a single drop of water all morning were finally being watered now.
The daisies: This! This is the feeling!
The hose twisted madly across the lawn: Aba aba aba.
Butler Zhong stepped on it with one foot.
The hose: Gah!
Thus ended its rebellious and unruly life.
And so, the hose-biting incident came to a close.
The summer heat was intense, so getting drenched in cold water did not feel icy at all. Instead, it added a welcome bit of coolness.
Even so, the elderly Butler Zhong still said, “Young master, you should go back and change your clothes first.”
Looking at Huo Beixing’s bare upper body—
An Yi: ?
Was this the emperor’s new clothes?
Huo Beixing did not notice anything wrong. Still smiling, he nodded with a somewhat slow, clumsy movement. His tall frame somehow looked a little foolish and silly.
But the post-trauma fear that had been on his face earlier had already disappeared, as though he had completely forgotten the hose-biting incident.
At that moment, the Dobermans in the distance finally managed to bite through the hose connection.
It was truly a heart-stirring achievement.
Just as Huo Beixing took a step forward, something at the edge of his vision caught his eye. The next second, he turned his head and looked toward An Yi.
Under the blazing sun, the man’s striking face turned toward An Yi. This face really did look like one of Nuwa’s favorites.
His gaze crashed unexpectedly into An Yi’s eyes.
At that moment, everything seemed to go silent. In Huo Beixing’s eyes, An Yi saw a kind of clear and pure stupidity.
An Yi: ???
Huo Beixing froze for a few seconds. Then, as if he had discovered some fascinating new creature, his peach-blossom eyes lit up, a bright smile spread across his face, and he ran over in this direction.
For a moment, he looked just like a giant dog running full speed.
An Yi was somewhat dumbfounded. He glanced behind himself, but Huo Beixing really was running straight toward him.
Did the man know him?
Thinking about it, that made sense. The Huo family should know that he existed.
It was not strange for the other party to recognize him. And since that elderly man had just called him “young master,” there was only one truth.
An Yi reasonably suspected that this man was Huo Beixing.
Stay calm!
Even a pervert was still a person. Equality for all depended on everyone.
It was wrong to look at people through tinted glasses. Shameful behavior like that had to be put to an end.
An Yi adjusted his mindset. This was their first meeting, so he had to leave a good impression. For the next two years, they ought to get along well.
An Yi also put on a smile.
Ha ha.
He lifted his head and looked ahead, only to see that Huo Beixing was not slowing down at all. The distance between them grew smaller and smaller, closer and closer…
An Yi: He’ll stop, right?
Taking a deep breath, An Yi greeted him, “You h— ahhh!!!”
Before the words “hello” could leave his mouth, they were replaced by a startled cry. The person who had been standing there vanished in an instant.
Huo Beixing pounced on him and knocked him flat onto the ground. The two-liter bottle of lemonade hanging around An Yi’s neck instantly performed a full-on “smash a rock on the chest” routine.
An Yi: Chi…
The little frog who had just entered the city instantly wanted to go back to the countryside.
With bits of grass hanging by his ear, An Yi’s eyes were briefly dazzled by the sunlight, only to be quickly enclosed in shadow. An unfamiliar scent filled the tip of his nose.
The man’s strong arms were braced on either side of An Yi’s head. The silver chain around his neck dangled down, his eyes were bright and spirited, and his face wore a radiant sunny smile as he stared unblinkingly at An Yi beneath him.
Huo Beixing’s clear eyes were full of curiosity. “Who are you?”
An Yi lay there on the ground, dizzy and disoriented, as if standing shoulder to shoulder with the stars. The two liters of lemonade had nearly smashed the little frog straight to heaven. His dialect slipped out unconsciously too. “I… I’m An Yi.”
Huo Beixing looked puzzled. “Who is An Yi?”
With that godlike handsome face so close at hand, An Yi answered, “An Yi is me.”
Huo Beixing repeated, “You’re An Yi?”
An Yi: ?
Did he not look like himself?
Seeing the two of them collapsed on the ground in the distance, Butler Zhong and the workers rushed over in fright to help them up.
One of the workers helped An Yi to his feet.
The young man wore a yellow hat, with bits of grass stuck to one cheek. He had on a simple oversized white T-shirt, yellow shorts that ended a little above the knee, and a big water bottle hanging from his chest.
A textbook elementary school spring outing outfit.
His small face was fair and clean, and because the weather was hot and he had been carrying so much luggage, his cheeks were slightly flushed from the heat.
When Butler Zhong saw him, he asked, “And you are?”
For the third time, An Yi answered with his identity. Human beings were, at heart, just repeaters. “I’m An Yi.”
Once Butler Zhong realized he was not some little celebrity, he let out a sigh of relief.
Ever since the news got out that Huo Beixing was going to marry, little stars had been popping up one after another over the past few days, hoping Huo Beixing would not marry and would instead give them a proper title.
Ridiculous.
Utterly shameless.
If this had happened back in the old master’s day, they would have been dragged to the village entrance and publicly shamed. It was only because times had changed that Huo Beixing had escaped such a fate.
In the past, Butler Zhong had served as an assistant to Huo Beixing’s grandfather. Later, he spent the latter half of his life as the Huo family’s butler and had looked after Huo Beixing for a period when he was young. Then Huo Beixing had gone off the rails, and Butler Zhong had lamented it for quite a while. Such a good child, and yet he had learned all those improper, scandalous ways.
After Huo Beixing’s accident left him foolish, the old master reassigned Butler Zhong to take care of him.
During this time, Butler Zhong had chased away little celebrities one after another.
Men and women alike, all kinds.
It made Uncle Zhong furious. You brat really had no standards at all, did you? You wanted to try every possible type.
At first, he had been extremely angry. What kind of behavior was this? Back in the old days, even dogs passing by would have spat at him.
These were all romantic debts Huo Er had racked up in the past. Butler Zhong had wanted to scold Huo Beixing, but the moment he turned around, he met the man’s innocent, childlike gaze.
Butler Zhong: …
The words rose to his lips, then were swallowed right back down.
Those were the outrageous things done by that scoundrel Huo Er. What did that have to do with Huo Beixing?
Fortunately, the person in front of him was not a little celebrity.
It was An Yi.
Wait…
“An Yi!” Butler Zhong exclaimed in shock.
An Yi, clutching his big water bottle, jumped so hard that even two birds flew off from a distant tree.
An Yi looked at the little birds flying away in the sky, feathers drifting down.
So this was An Yi—the destined person calculated by the blind fortune-teller, the one who had come to marry into the Huo family!
Butler Zhong hurriedly pulled out the photo from his pocket to confirm it. He looked at An Yi, then at the photo, and rubbed his chin with his white-gloved hand. “Doesn’t look alike.”
An Yi stretched his neck over to take a look too.
The photo had been taken at night. The whole thing was pitch black, except for one area circled in colored marker.
Looking at the single little white tooth visible in the photo, if he was not mistaken, that should have been where he was standing.
An Yi: How rude.
The charcoal-black An Yi from one year ago.
An Yi said, “That’s me.”
Then he looked up at Butler Zhong, smiled brightly, and revealed a row of little white teeth.
Butler Zhong suddenly understood. Holding the photo up for comparison, he said, “It’s you. Exactly the same.”
An Yi: …
Who knew his true form was actually just his teeth.
Huo Beixing, all six-foot-two of him, stood there eagerly and asked Butler Zhong, “Uncle Zhong, who is An Yi?”
Butler Zhong replied gently, “Young Master An Yi is the person who is going to marry young master.”
The person going to marry him!
Those words hit like a bolt from the blue. Huo Beixing froze on the spot.
“Marry? Marry Beixing?!”
Butler Zhong answered, “That’s right.”
Huo Beixing stood there dazed for a few seconds, then suddenly bared his teeth.
“I don’t want to! I don’t want a wife!”
He looked exactly like a pure, innocent boy terrified of being defiled.
An Yi: If he had not spent the last two days reading gossip headlines, he might actually have believed him.
But logically speaking, even if the other party disliked him, the reaction should not have been like this.
After all, he had not come here to ruin this family.
He had come to join this family.
Besides, it was the Huo family themselves who had deliberately searched for someone with a matching birth chart because of Huo Beixing’s situation.
An Yi looked at the six-foot-two crybaby in front of him and froze for a few seconds. Then something instantly clicked in his mind.
!
Looking at those eyes filled with clear and simple stupidity, An Yi finally more or less understood what had happened to him.
Huo Beixing had become stupid.
An Yi froze where he stood.
All the same-sex dirty videos he had desperately crammed in advance went up in smoke that very instant.
The adult channel had become the children’s channel.
The little frog’s Mercedes instantly turned into a coin-operated kiddie ride. Experienced drivers were forbidden from entering this road ahead.
He had thought the next two years of his life would be rated eighteen and up.
Who would have guessed it would actually be eighteen and under?
At first, Huo Beixing had been full of curiosity toward this sudden new arrival. An Yi was a fresh face, fair and slender, with bright black eyes. He looked obedient and not fierce at all. He seemed like the kind of person who could play with him.
But the moment he heard that this person was going to be his wife, Huo Beixing’s face immediately fell. From joy to sorrow in an instant, he looked utterly heartbroken.
How could it be a wife?
Then he turned and ran.
Looking at the back of the twenty-five-year-old rebellious child, Butler Zhong called out, “Young master!”
Huo Beixing did not stop.
Butler Zhong raised his voice again. “Lunch will be ready soon!”
The person who had just run far away immediately changed direction and dashed back toward the imposing residence nearby.
An Yi: …
If he was not stupid, he was actually pretty clever.
There were servants in the house, so Butler Zhong did not need to worry. He turned back to welcome An Yi properly.
“I’m sorry. Young master has been in a rebellious phase lately.”
An Yi stammered, “N-no, it’s fine.”
Seeing that An Yi still did not understand Huo Beixing’s condition, Butler Zhong explained, “A while ago, young master fell down the stairs at the old residence. When he woke up, he was like this. The doctors said his intelligence fluctuates somewhere between that of a five- to eight-year-old.”
No one had been present when Huo Beixing met with the accident. By the time the servants found him, he was already unconscious at the bottom of the stairs.
As Butler Zhong spoke, his gaze shifted to An Yi.
An Yi was stunned for a few seconds, then slapped his thigh. “Aiyaa, that’s really too pitiful.”
Butler Zhong nodded. “To the outside world, we say that young master was made stupid by poison.”
An Yi looked confused. “Why?”
Butler Zhong lifted his head to the sky. “Because saying he became stupid from falling down the stairs is too embarrassing.”
An Yi: …
A great family, after all. An Yi expressed his understanding.
Seeing that Butler Zhong was already elderly, An Yi felt too embarrassed to let him help carry the luggage, so he quickly grabbed everything himself.
Butler Zhong glanced at him.
An Yi said, “I’ve been working out lately.”
As he spoke, he lifted the passion fruit in his hand twice.
I’m a macho man.
The grandeur of the Huo family left An Yi utterly dumbfounded. Butler Zhong had someone take his things and put them into Huo Beixing’s room, then brought him to lunch first.
Huo Beixing was nowhere to be seen at the dining table. Butler Zhong asked Aunt Wu, who did the cooking, and she shook her head, saying Huo Beixing was still sulking and did not want to come out.
But even if Huo Beixing did not want to accept it, the marriage alliance would not be canceled.
After all, they could not just watch him remain foolish for the rest of his life.
Besides, there was no telling how many marriage attempts might be needed. If An Yi did not work, then in two years there would still be the Li family waiting.
An Yi, on the other hand, did not feel too strongly about it. The other party now had the intelligence of a child between five and eight. It was only natural for him to be afraid of strangers, and accepting him would take time.
He had assumed that, with Huo Beixing in such a childlike state of mind, he would not accept him any time soon.
Who would have thought that when it was time to go to bed that night, Huo Beixing would keep coming out of his room every so often to check whether An Yi had gone over yet?
There was resistance in his eyes, but also a bit of anticipation. Huo Beixing’s mental age was too young for him to hide his thoughts. All his complicated feelings were written plainly across his face.
Huo Beixing paced back and forth outside the room several times, growing anxious when An Yi still did not come over.
Why wasn’t he coming yet?
Butler Zhong found an excuse for him. “Young master is in a childlike state right now. One moment he dislikes something, the next moment he’s curious about it.”
An Yi said it was alright.
A true macho man had a very broad mind.
He was just about to head into the room when he had barely taken a step before Butler Zhong suddenly grabbed him.
An Yi turned back in confusion. “What’s wrong?!”
Butler Zhong hesitated, clearly wanting to say something. At last, he instructed him earnestly, “Young Master An Yi, please be a little more accommodating tonight. Although our young master is not technically inexperienced, it may as well be his first time. In his heart, he is still a pure and untouched maiden boy.”
Although Huo Er’s previous life of debauchery had made him no good thing, what did any of that have to do with this spotless and innocent Huo Beixing?
After saying that, Butler Zhong turned and went downstairs, a faint trace of sorrow on his face.
After tonight, their young master would go from a pure untouched maiden boy… to yesterday’s wilted flower.
An Yi found the issue a little too profound. After all, he did not know how either. Even though he had watched those dirty films, it was still beyond his capabilities.
An Yi entered the room in distress.
But after only a few steps inside, a huge force suddenly seized his arm. In an instant, his feet left the ground and the world spun around him.
By the time he regained his senses, An Yi had already sunk into the soft big bed.
Huo Beixing leaned over him, smiling brightly with a hint of mischief. His peach-blossom eyes narrowed slightly.
“Can you give me a baby?”
An Yi:!
