Chapter 53: “I Won’t Call You Wife Anymore…”
Jian Tang froze.
If the person who appeared before me back then hadn’t been Feng Xun, but someone else entirely, would I have gladly accepted them just the same, and been perfectly happy to let them become my “wife”?
Perhaps… he would have.
After all, he had been genuinely terrified of Feng Xun at the very beginning. The man was completely different from the adorable wife he had envisioned; the product simply didn’t match the description. If he had successfully contacted the black-market merchant back then, he might have already returned this “terrifying wife.”
But looking back from where he stood today, trying to reconstruct an alternate timeline—trying to imagine another person stepping into his life, living in his home, becoming his wife, and staying by his side day and night—he… really couldn’t imagine it.
His wife was Feng Xun, and Feng Xun was his wife. This was already an established fact, so why did he need to imagine any other possibility?
Seeing the youth’s dazed expression and how he remained speechless for a long while, Feng Xun already knew the answer.
He couldn’t help but smile bitterly.
Previously, he had thought Little Tang liked him without realizing it—that the boy actually harbored feelings for him but just hadn’t quite awakened to them yet, and that with a little guidance, they could move toward each other. Now, it seemed he had been completely conceited and overly confident.
There were benches for resting alongside the wooden boardwalk. Holding the youth’s hand, Feng Xun stepped out of the crowd admiring the fireflies and sat down on a bench.
The crowd gradually drifted into the distance, leaving the surroundings quiet and serene. The night breeze rustled through the treetops, and a sky full of fireflies blinked and flickered among the thickets.
A peaceful, gentle night like this was perfect for open, honest communication, and for discussing hidden thoughts.
Jian Tang looked at the person beside him. The other man was also looking down at him, his expression appearing somewhat gloomy and obscure under the dark cover of night.
“Little Tang,” Feng Xun asked softly, “why do you want a wife so badly?”
Jian Tang fell silent for a moment before whispering, “I… I want to find happiness.”
He couldn’t tell the other party about the Book of Destiny, as that would expose his identity as a monster. Thus, he omitted that part and only expressed his underlying desire.
Feng Xun was a bit surprised. “In your mind, obtaining a wife is directly linked to obtaining happiness?”
The youth nodded truthfully.
Feng Xun: “Did my appearance make you happy?”
Jian Tang let out a soft hum and smiled. “Wife, ever since you appeared, I’ve become very lucky, very joyful, and very happy.”
“If it had been someone else instead—if they had appeared before you, lived with you, and also brought you happiness and joy—would they also be your ‘wife’ to you?”
Jian Tang opened his mouth, but no words came out.
According to the “happiness equation” he had always lived by, the answer seemed to be yes. But… but he felt like something wasn’t quite right.
Obtaining a wife could bring happiness, but must anyone who brought him happiness automatically be his wife?
If the latter held true, wouldn’t that mean a person could have multiple wives?
But in current human emotional concepts, a wife was unique. You couldn’t have many wives at the same time; otherwise, everyone would revile you as a massive scumbag.
“So… you’re actually not my wife?” The youth’s expression turned frantic, looking as if his entire world had just collapsed. “Could it… could it be that I got it wrong?”
Seeing that the youth was on the verge of tears, Feng Xun quickly smoothed his fur and pulled him into his arms.
“Little Tang, you didn’t get it wrong. A good wife certainly brings a person happiness, but for someone to truly become your wife, there is another very important criterion.”
“What is it?”
“You need to like each other.”
Jian Tang immediately blurted out, “Wife, I like you!”
Feng Xun offered a bitter smile. “The one you like is merely the concept of a ‘wife,’ not me.”
Jian Tang was utterly bewildered. “Is there a difference? My current wife is you.”
“Then tell me, who am I?”
Jian Tang instinctively wanted to say “you are my wife,” but when he met the man’s slightly piercing, intense gaze, his heart trembled for no apparent reason.
“You… you are Feng Xun.”
Feng Xun nodded. “Only when the person you like is no longer just a ‘wife,’ but me as an individual, can I truly become your ‘wife.'”
In truth, besides wanting to fulfill the youth’s wish, Feng Xun had a bit of a selfish motive for bringing him to the Firefly Forest today—he wanted to use the romantic atmosphere of these summer fireflies to solemnly express his feelings to him.
His parents had sealed their engagement under the exact same scenery. Feng Xun felt that since he inherited their bloodline, perhaps he would also inherit their good luck for confessions in the same setting.
As it turned out, superstitious thinking was a mistake. Compared to his parents’ natural and effortless engagement, he… hadn’t even managed to say his confession before being utterly disqualified.
The only thing Little Tang liked was the outer shell of a “seat wife,” not him, the “inner filling.”
And this was precisely the cause of that bizarre feeling he had been experiencing. His subconscious had long since picked up on the issue, yet he himself had been wallowing in a self-delusion, only recognizing reality today.
Jian Tang was completely dizzy from this wordplay.
What did he mean by saying that only after he stopped liking a “wife” could he let the other party become his wife?
Wasn’t—wasn’t that a total contradiction?
“I… I don’t understand.” Jian Tang hung his head in dejection, feeling a bit like crying. Did having a wife actually require passing an exam?
Because I’m too stupid to understand the question, have I been stripped of my right to have a wife?
“It’s okay. If you really don’t understand, you don’t have to force yourself to.”
Feng Xun patted the youth’s head, his movements just as gentle as before, and let out a soft laugh.
“If you want to view me as your ‘wife,’ that’s perfectly fine. We can still get along exactly like we used to. How does that sound?”
Jian Tang blinked anxiously. “R-really? Is that really okay?”
“Yes.”
The man gave his reassurance, and after that, the two continued to walk hand-in-hand along the boardwalk where the fireflies danced.
During this time, Feng Xun indeed stopped correcting Jian Tang whenever he called him “wife.” It seemed that just as he had said, the two could continue to interact as before without needing to change a single thing.
They quickly caught up with the rest of the firefly-viewing crowd, listening to the guide share interesting trivia about the insects.
Later on, the group arrived at a small pavilion meant for resting, where free wishing tags were being handed out. Visitors could write their wishes on the paper tags and hang them on the pavilion’s railings.
Jian Tang saw that Feng Xun wrote: [I hope Little Tang will be happy and joyful forever.]
So, he also wrote: [I hope my wife will be happy and joyful forever.]
The two wishing tags were tied together and hung onto the pavilion’s fence.
The tourists who had finished hanging their tags were all smiles, and those who saw fireflies landing on their papers were even more ecstatic.
Infected by the joyful atmosphere around them, Jian Tang happily turned his head to look at his wife, only to find the other man staring intently at the wishing tags fluttering in the wind on the fence. He didn’t know what the man was thinking, but he seemed entirely lost in thought.
His wife seemed a little unhappy.
This unhappiness wasn’t anger, resentment, or being weighed down by worries; it felt more like… a bit of regret and disappointment.
What was his wife regretting? What was he disappointed about?
That night, Jian Tang suffered from insomnia.
The itinerary tonight had actually been very fun. Even though there was a conversation in the middle that he couldn’t comprehend, his wife hadn’t brought it up again afterward. The two of them finished watching the fireflies, went to a bustling night market for a late-night snack after leaving the forest park, and by the time they returned home, it was already very late.
Jian Tang didn’t suggest continuing to share a room with his wife because he had a feeling: his wife seemed to want some quiet, alone time tonight.
Since he didn’t bring it up, the other party naturally didn’t ask either. The two exchanged a friendly goodnight, turned back to their respective rooms, and went to sleep.
But Jian Tang couldn’t sleep.
He lay on his cozy little bed, tossing and turning, tossing and turning, completely devoid of sleepiness.
The moment he closed his eyes, his mind couldn’t help but replay the image of his wife staring blankly at the wishing tag.
[I hope my wife will be happy and joyful forever]—was there something wrong with the wish he made?
He truly, deeply wanted his wife to be just like him—happy and joyful.
Or was it because he was simply too stupid to understand the things his wife said, which made his wife feel regretful and disappointed?
Where exactly did the problem lie…
After turning over yet again with a mind still bursting with chaotic thoughts, Jian Tang gave up, turned on the light, and sat up from the bed.
He hugged his blanket and stared blankly in low spirits for a while, then sluggishly pulled up his system panel and logged into the Monster Forum.
There were many nocturnal monsters in the Anomalous World. Even though it was currently the dead of night, the monsters active on the forum were still numerous, and every section was bustling with life.
Jian Tang clicked into the “Human Transformation” section, started a new thread, and sought help from his fellow monsters—
[Hello everyone, I am an F-rank little monster. I have some confusion regarding human emotions and would like to consult some seniors…]
—
A line of dawn lit up the eastern horizon, and Feng Xun opened his eyes right on time.
He had barely slept all night, tossing and turning until three or four in the morning before catching a brief nap. Driven by his biological clock, he woke up on time in the early morning.
Opening his bedroom door, he heard noises coming from the direction of the kitchen. Walking over to take a look—
“Little Tang?”
Feng Xun looked at the youth busy in front of the counter in surprise. “Why are you up so early?”
“I’m making breakfast.”
Jian Tang had shared a room with Feng Xun twice and knew roughly when the man usually woke up, so he made a deliberate effort to get up early today to fulfill his promise of making breakfast for him.
“The things in the pot will take a while to finish steaming, go wash up first,” Jian Tang said with a smile.
Feng Xun scrutinized the youth. There were obvious dark circles under the boy’s eyes; it seemed that just like him, he hadn’t slept much last night either.
Yet, the youth’s spirit was excellent and his smile was bright and radiant. This kind of bursting vitality and energy originating from the depths of his heart couldn’t be faked.
Perhaps the youth had tossed and turned last night because of certain matters, but at this very moment, he had clearly resolved that worry and had rallied his spirits once again.
But… what exactly was the matter that had troubled him?
While brushing his teeth in the bathroom, Feng Xun thought silently to himself.
Was it the words I said yesterday?
Most likely.
He couldn’t help but feel a bit annoyed with himself: I shouldn’t have run my mouth back then.
So what if he was being treated as a “wife skin”? Since Little Tang couldn’t tell the difference himself, why did he have to insist on drawing a crystal-clear boundary?
In truth, after a night had passed, Feng Xun had already come around: he admitted that when he first learned the “truth,” he had indeed broken down a little. But when normal people live their lives, who doesn’t turn a blind eye now and then? Once he adjusted his own mindset, it didn’t feel like that big of a deal.
Little Tang liked the “wife skin,” and he was currently wearing the “wife skin.” Wasn’t that a perfect match?
As long as he held onto this position tightly and securely, whoever the hell dared to challenge him, he would crush them to death. Over time, who would still be able to distinguish whether Little Tang liked a wife or Feng Xun?
Of course, the most ideal scenario was for their relationship to upgrade further—moving from a system-decreed “cohabitation” to a more stable “marital cohabitation.”
Naturally, if Little Tang didn’t have that kind of mindset, he wouldn’t trick him into marriage for his own selfish desires; he was merely thinking about it in his head.
Finishing his wash-up absentmindedly, Feng Xun returned to the kitchen to find that Jian Tang had already laid the breakfast out on the table.
Two glasses of hot milk, a portion of frozen custard lava buns that had been heated up, two containers of packaged vegetable salad from the supermarket, and a side of two fried eggs.
Aside from the fried eggs looking a bit disastrous, the rest of the food only needed to be heated to be edible, so almost nothing went wrong.
“Eat while it’s hot!” Jian Tang attentively pushed the food in front of the man. “Feng Xun, which one do you like to eat? I’ll buy more of it next time.”
Feng Xun’s movements paused.
“What did you just call me?”
“Feng Xun,” Jian Tang repeated clearly. “I will call you by your name from now on. I won’t call you ‘wife’ anymore.”
“…”
Feng Xun suddenly realized that although he had expressed yesterday that he didn’t want to be a mere wife skin, when the youth actually complied and carried it out, his first reaction wasn’t relief, but… an inexplicable trace of panic.
It was as if a chain that had previously bound them tightly together had suddenly snapped, and before he could even latch onto a backup safety belt, his heart felt completely unmoored, suddenly losing its balance in a hollow void.
“Why… so sudden?”
The youth’s expression was open, his gaze crystal clear, and his words carried immense weight.
“I’ve decided to start over from the very beginning.” He lightly balled his hand into a fist and struck it on the table, as if delivering a solemn verdict.
“I’ve decided to start from scratch and seriously pursue you, Feng Xun.”
Feng Xun almost thought something was wrong with his ears.
“…What?”
So Jian Tang repeated it once more.
“I, Jian Tang, intend to pursue you, Feng Xun!”
The youth puffed out his chest, announcing with soaring fighting spirit, “Starting from today, I am your pursuer!”
Feng Xun: “…………”
This development was far too unexpected—even a bit absurd. It took Feng Xun a moment to collect himself before asking, “Do you know… what ‘pursuit’ means?”
“I know. It is a necessary step to make someone your wife, and it is also the very first sprouting of an intimate relationship,” Jian Tang read aloud from the notes he had copied from the forum last night.
“The process of pursuit is extremely important. You have to find ways to move the other person, to let them understand how much you like them, and more importantly, to let them see your sincere affection and burning, honest heart. Only when the other party is willing to accept you can you establish an official emotional relationship, giving this affection the possibility to develop further.”
The cry for help Jian Tang posted last night had received an enthusiastic response from his fellow monsters on the forum. In just a short hour and a half, the number of comments had reached triple digits.
Of course, the main reason it attracted so much attention so quickly was because this matter was rather bizarre: it was the first time the anomalous monsters had ever heard that you could directly buy a “human wife” and bring them home.
Thus, amid everyone’s chaotic discussion, Jian Tang realized he had made a highly fatal mistake: his self-righteous “one-step completion” was actually a precarious castle in the air.
Relying solely on the system’s unilateral brainwashing without going through the baptism of a mutually responsive romance meant the wife wouldn’t be able to feel the love coming from their partner. Even if a family was temporarily formed, this kind of familial relationship was fragile and short-lived.
It was like water without a source, or a tree without roots. Who knew which day the wife might suddenly wake up, find herself unable to tolerate this loveless life any longer, and decisively pack up and run away from home?
After reading everyone’s analysis, Jian Tang broke into a cold sweat on the spot. He then asked for guidance with an open mind, studied diligently, and ultimately decided: he had to make up for this missed lesson in romance, and he was going to chase his wife from scratch!
Faced with the youth’s generous declaration, Feng Xun’s eye twitched, his emotions complicated.
While it was great that Little Tang had this intention… feelings weren’t something that could be generated out of thin air just by following a textbook or a map.
The youth’s so-called “pursuit” and “liking” were probably just superficial, much like following a book, liking a movie, or favoring a type of food.
He didn’t think this so-called “pursuit” would make the boy awaken to romance. If anything, it would cause their relationship to regress even further—
He had originally convinced himself and decided to sit firmly in the position of “wife” so that no other competitors would have a chance. Yet overnight, not only did he painfully lose the iron throne of “wife,” but he also had to start all over from the beginning?
Originally, there was an imperial sword guarding this place, but now even that layer of filtering halo was gone. What if the youth veered off course while chasing him and decided to chase someone else instead?
He would rather have love after marriage than risk complications born from a long delay. The former at least granted him an official title, while the latter… heh, he probably wouldn’t even be able to sleep peacefully in the future.
It was truly difficult for Feng Xun to accept, but seeing the youth’s enthusiastic look, he couldn’t bear to pour cold water on him. Thus, he followed the boy’s train of thought and asked, “Then what comes after this ‘pursuit’ step? Have you made plans for the follow-up?”
“Yes! Of course!”
Jian Tang spoke eloquently. “We need to start from scratch and progress step-by-step. Just pretend that the two of us have only just met right now. In the process of pursuit, we will slowly get to know each other. Once you understand that I truly like you and that it’s not just talk, and you are willing to accept me, that will be our dating phase. After officially dating, we still need to go through a trial period. Once the trial period is passed, we can move in together and begin the next stage—the adjustment period of cohabitation.”
Feng Xun’s eyelids twitched violently as he listened. “How long do you plan for this process to take?”
Jian Tang: “At least one or two years, right? I heard that when things progress too fast, the breakup happens even faster.”
One or two years??
He found even a single month to be too long.
Feng Xun calmed himself down for a moment, attempting to salvage this rapidly regressing relationship. “Actually, the way we are right now is already very good. There’s no need to go through all this…”
“Once we finish the dating trial period and the cohabitation adjustment period, we can get engaged.” Jian Tang lowered his head to flip through the memo pad on his phone, which was completely filled with the “study materials” he had copied down last night.
“Hmm, engagement, taking wedding photos, then preparing for the wedding, decorating the marital home, sending out wedding invitations to friends and family, and announcing this grand, joyous occasion to everyone. After holding a grand and magnificent wedding, we also need to have a sweet and romantic honeymoon trip, and we have to celebrate our wedding anniversary every year after marriage…”
“Then that is indeed highly necessary.” Feng Xun adopted a completely righteous expression, his tone firm. “Extremely necessary.”
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