Chapter 1: An Ancient Netizen
“The Tingwei Office is one of the Nine Ministers, yet their family actually produced such a shameless wretch.”
“I heard he was thrown straight off Crown Prince Jiao’s bed in front of everyone. He was even whipped ten times, his flesh torn open. At the time, everyone thought he wouldn’t survive.”
“A filthy cut-sleeve who disgraced the imperial family!”
“Tsk. If I were him, I would have smashed my head against a wall and died already. That way, he wouldn’t bring disaster upon his parents or disgrace the imperial family. What an embarrassment.”
Chen Bai suddenly sat up from the bed, his face covered in cold sweat.
He picked up his phone and looked at it. Three in the afternoon.
On his phone was a message from his friend Tang Shen: “Brother Bai, I haven’t been able to contact you for days. Where are you?”
Chen Bai calmly replied with two words: “Ancient times.”
“Brother Bai, are you messing with me? You’re texting me from ancient times?”
Chen Bai glanced at the message. Sure enough, no one would believe it.
He could not explain why, despite being in a different era, his phone could still receive a signal.
Nor could he explain why he had woken up inside this body.
He casually used his phone to take two photos of the scenery outside the window and sent them to Tang Shen.
In the photos was the courtyard of a traditional garden, with corridors made of dark reddish wood, full of ancient charm.
He added a sentence: “An authentic ancient courtyard.”
Tang Shen replied, “Where are there any truly ancient residences left nowadays? They’ve all been renovated countless times. Brother Bai, are you on vacation in an ancient town?”
Chen Bai smiled and did not force an explanation anymore.
Instead, he picked up his phone, opened a shopping app, and tapped purchase on medicine for pain relief, anti-inflammation, and external injuries.
A medicine box that was completely out of place in this environment appeared in front of him just like that, as if it had always been there.
Why?
Unknown.
If he had not accidentally discovered that he could still use his phone to purchase goods online, this body might truly have died.
He opened the ointment and, with some difficulty, applied it to his back.
The eldest son of the Tingwei Office, one of the Nine Ministers, the once glorious and arrogant Young Master Bai of Shangjing, had actually fallen to such a cold and desolate state. It was enough to make one sigh.
Hated by gods and ghosts alike, looked down upon, insulted, cursed at—even walking down the street would get him pelted with stones. This was Chen Bai’s current situation.
But who knew that Young Master Bai, whom everyone called shameless, the cut-sleeve (a.k.a gay) who had seduced the crown prince, had actually been forcibly dragged onto the bed by Crown Prince Jiao’s men, then thrown off when everyone arrived, humiliated to the extreme, and sentenced to be whipped.
In front of so many eyes, his reputation was utterly destroyed. No matter how he defended himself, it was useless. How humiliating, how suffocating.
Chen Bai’s current body was very strange. Perhaps because he possessed two people’s memories, those false accusations and insults felt as if they had happened to him personally, as if he had experienced them himself.
Even thinking of them slightly made his body tremble. His chest was clogged with resentment until it made him panic, and even his eyes turned red.
Chen Bai quickly calmed himself.
“Since I’m already here, I might as well settle down. In the end, I have to survive.”
He was not a person with great ambitions. Being able to live properly was already good enough. But judging from his current situation, even living like a normal person would probably not be easy.
Just as he thought that, his phone suddenly began flashing.
He picked it up and saw that it was all garbled text.
Spam message? Who was this bored?
A prank?
When he looked at the other party’s profile picture, he could not help freezing.
Wasn’t this the account on his backup phone? Because it was a backup phone, it only had his own contact information on it.
Chen Bai’s expression became strange.
The phone in his hand had actually been picked up by the original owner while he was out traveling. He had once suspected that his waking up in this body might have something to do with it.
In his previous life, when he had gotten into a car accident, he had rolled down a cliff with two phones on him.
If this phone of his could be picked up by an ancient person, then perhaps his backup phone could also have been picked up by another ancient person.
Looking at the garbled message sent over, had the other person thought they had picked up some magical stone and were seriously studying it?
It was truly hard to imagine an ancient person poking around on a phone.
Chen Bai hesitated for a moment. Perhaps out of curiosity, he set up some special effects, such as cat ears and a sharp, V-shaped face, guaranteeing that even his own mother would not recognize him. Then he started a video call.
After all, if he sent a message asking who the other party was, the other party probably would not recognize simplified Chinese characters.
…
The Great Qian Kingdom, Shangjing City, imperial palace.
Recently, Qi Zheng had picked up a particularly interesting stone slab.
Speaking of the origin of this stone slab, it was quite legendary. He had spent eight years as a hostage prince in the Great Zhao Kingdom, and when the term ended and he was returning to Shangjing City of the Great Qian Kingdom, a meteor had fallen from the sky and struck his carriage. This stone slab was obtained then.
The stone slab was square, made of unknown material, smooth as a mirror, cool and comfortable to the touch. From time to time, light flashed across it, as if it were breathing. It was incredibly mysterious.
When pressed, strange symbols would appear on it.
These symbols resembled writing, but were also very different. He always felt that these symbols had some special meaning, yet he could not find any pattern.
Because this stone slab felt excellent in the hand and was very easy to carry, he had recently been keeping it on him, taking it out to study whenever he had nothing to do.
For example, right now, this stone slab had changed again.
A green icon and a red icon appeared on its surface.
Qi Zheng touched the stone slab, but nothing happened. Even the symbols that used to appear when pressed did not show up anymore.
He touched here and poked there, and his finger landed on the green icon.
The next moment, Qi Zheng nearly threw the stone slab in his hand away.
What had he seen?
On the stone slab, there was a demon with two fluffy ears, a palm-sized face, and an inhumanly pointed chin, blinking gem-black eyes at him.
This had to be a demon. It even had cat ears.
The key point was that this demon was indecently dressed. Its shoulders were bare, and its trouser legs were rolled up more than halfway, revealing two unbelievably fair calves.
Wasn’t this exactly the sort of demon in storybooks that seduced strong young men?
In truth, Chen Bai had injuries on his back and could not put on clothes at all. On top of that, the weather was hot, so he had rolled up his trouser legs a bit.
In Chen Bai’s era, this was nothing at all. Never mind exposed shoulders and legs—even appearing on television in only underpants would not make anyone say anything. But he had overlooked that this was ancient times from several centuries ago. In other people’s eyes, his appearance was probably outrageously flirtatious.
At least in Qi Zheng’s eyes, it was more or less like that.
Qi Zheng had already drawn his sword. He gripped it, preparing to split this demon apart.
He had thought he had picked up a divine stone. Who knew it was actually an evil object?
Chen Bai was also looking at Qi Zheng.
He had not expected it to be him—Prince Zheng.
Everyone in Shangjing said that Prince Zheng had been sent to the Great Zhao Kingdom as a hostage when he was young. Lacking proper upbringing, he had a perverse and violent nature, was gloomy, ruthless, and solitary, destined to be a lone baleful star, and disliked by the king.
Thinking about it, that made sense. Someone who could be sent away as a hostage must have had something unlikable about him.
In the past, Chen Bai had also always avoided him from afar because of his temperament. They had not had much interaction.
But now, Chen Bai smiled.
Because ever since Prince Zheng returned to Shangjing, he had caused Crown Prince Jiao plenty of trouble. Just for that alone, Chen Bai found him much more pleasing to the eye.
But why was Prince Zheng gripping a sword with a frosty, stern expression?
Was he about to split the phone apart?
Chen Bai quickly said, “Don’t. Keep it as a memento, if nothing else.”
It was rare enough to have an ancient person as an online friend, yet he was about to chop up the phone.
Qi Zheng: “…”
The stone… the stone slab spoke?
Chen Bai was just about to say something else when faint footsteps came from outside the door.
He hung up the video call and put away his phone.
The door was pushed open, revealing a clever-looking child with a straight fringe.
Seeing that Chen Bai had already woken up, he pushed the door open and walked in, carrying a bowl of medicine in his hands.
He scooped medicine with a spoon, stood on tiptoe, and tried to feed it into Chen Bai’s mouth.
“Brother, I have to cover my face when I go out now. Everyone calls me the younger brother of a lecherous ghost.”
“Brother, the doctor said one pot of medicine should be boiled down into one bowl of liquid. Your little brother is so smart—I had them boil it into three bowls. Later, I’ll go get two more bowls for you. After you finish them, the injuries on your body will be healed.”
So clever it was almost ridiculous.
Chen Bai: “…”
No wonder the medicine in his mouth had barely any taste.
This child was Chen Bai’s younger brother from the same parents, Chen Xiaobu, the young master of the Tingwei Office.
His courtyard was now very deserted. Aside from the people who delivered meals, no one else was allowed in. Only Chen Xiaobu, relying on his young age and the fact that no one bothered to argue with him, could sneak in.
As Chen Bai drank the tasteless medicine, he asked, “What’s the situation outside now?”
Chen Xiaobu was now his only link to the outside world. Whether the Tingwei Office was putting on a show for the imperial family or for someone else, he had to appear to be left to fend for himself. That way, the Tingwei Office would have an easier time.
Chen Xiaobu said without a care, “Isn’t it still the same? A ring of scholars has surrounded our residence. They take turns cursing from morning until night. Now I look forward to rain every day, so it can drench them like drowned rats…”
A rat crossing the street, shouted at by everyone, blockaded at his own door, stabbed in the spine by writing brushes—it was truly miserable.
Chen Xiaobu continued, “I heard from the servants who went out to buy vegetables that Crown Prince Jiao recently accepted an extraordinary retainer. He paints extremely realistic paintings, and even the king has praised him highly. Now many famous scholars and masters visit the crown prince’s residence every day to admire his paintings. The place is packed with visitors and extremely lively.”
Chen Bai: “…”
Crown Prince Jiao knew how to recognize and employ talented people. What he was proudest of was having a residence full of retainers and strategists, each with their own strengths. Everyone in Shangjing knew it.
But now Chen Bai was in such a wretched state, while the other party was enjoying boundless glory. It truly made him unwilling to accept it.
“Brother, what’s wrong? Why are your eyes red?”
Chen Bai paused. Just thinking about it had affected him to this degree? The resentment in this body was really too heavy.
He composed himself. He truly could not drink any more of the medicine water Chen Xiaobu was offering him, so he said, “Remember to tell me whenever you hear any new news.”
Chen Xiaobu nodded, half-understanding. “Brother, if our Tingwei Office collapses, will we have to go out and beg for food? You can hold the big bowl, and I’ll hold the small bowl. We’ll be so pitiful.”
Chen Bai: “…”
After sending away Chen Xiaobu, whose little head was full of who-knew-what thoughts, Chen Bai endured the stabbing pain in his back and walked into the courtyard.
He glanced at the two rough-work old women guarding the courtyard entrance. He was currently under house arrest. He walked to a flower bed that blocked their line of sight.
He took out his phone and snapped a picture of the flowers blooming brightly in the flower bed. Even the bees flying among them were clearly visible in the photo.
“A painter who can paint extremely realistic paintings? Packed with visitors and boundless glory? A residence full of retainers and strategists, which he’s proudest of? Crown Prince Jiao is living quite splendidly.”
The corners of Chen Bai’s mouth lifted. He opened his phone, found a printing shop, and sent over the photo he had just taken.
When pressed, strange symbols would appear on it.
These symbols resembled writing, but were also very different. He always felt that these symbols had some special meaning, yet he could not find any pattern.
Because the stone slab felt excellent in the hand and was very convenient to carry, he had recently been keeping it on him. Whenever he had nothing to do, he would take it out and study it.
For example, right now, the stone slab had changed again.
A green icon and a red icon appeared on the stone slab.
Qi Zheng touched the slab, but there was no reaction. Even the symbols that used to appear whenever he pressed it were gone.
He touched here and poked there, and his finger landed on the green icon.
The next moment, Qi Zheng nearly threw the stone slab in his hand away.
What had he just seen?
On the stone slab, there was a demon with two fluffy ears, a palm-sized face, and an inhumanly pointed chin, blinking gem-black eyes at him.
This had to be a demon. It even had cat ears.
The key point was that this demon was indecently dressed. Its shoulders were bare, and its trouser legs were rolled up more than halfway, revealing two unbelievably fair calves.
Was this not exactly the sort of demon from storybooks that seduced strong young men?
In truth, it was because Chen Bai had injuries on his back and could not put on clothes at all. On top of that, the weather was hot, so he had rolled up his trouser legs a little.
In Chen Bai’s era, this was nothing at all. Never mind exposed shoulders and legs—even appearing on television wearing only underpants would not make anyone say much. But he had overlooked the fact that this was ancient times from several centuries ago. In other people’s eyes, dressed like this, he was probably scandalously provocative.
At least in Qi Zheng’s eyes, it was more or less like that.
Qi Zheng had already drawn his sword. He gripped it, preparing to split this demon apart.
He had thought he had picked up a divine stone. He had not expected it to be an evil object.
Chen Bai was also looking at Qi Zheng.
He had not expected it to be him—Prince Zheng.
Everyone in Shangjing City said that Prince Zheng had been sent to the Great Zhao Kingdom as a hostage when he was young. Lacking proper upbringing, he was perverse and violent by nature, gloomy, ruthless, and solitary, destined to be a baleful lone star and disliked by the king.
Thinking about it, that made sense. Someone who could be sent away as a hostage must have had something unlikable about him.
In the past, because of the other party’s personality, Chen Bai had always avoided him from afar. They had not had much interaction.
But now, Chen Bai smiled.
Because ever since Prince Zheng returned to Shangjing, he had caused Crown Prince Jiao no small amount of trouble. For that alone, Chen Bai found him much more pleasing to the eye.
Only, why was Prince Zheng holding a sword with such a frosty, solemn expression?
Was he about to chop up the phone?
Chen Bai quickly said, “Don’t. Keep it as a memento, if nothing else.”
It was rare enough to have an ancient person as an online friend, yet he was about to chop the phone apart.
Qi Zheng: “…”
The stone… the stone slab spoke?
Chen Bai was just about to say something when faint footsteps came from outside the door.
He hung up the video call and put away his phone.
The door was pushed open, revealing a clever-looking child with a straight fringe.
Seeing that Chen Bai had already woken up, the child pushed the door open and walked in, carrying a bowl of medicine.
He scooped up the medicine with a spoon, stood on tiptoe, and tried to feed it into Chen Bai’s mouth.
“Brother, I have to cover my face whenever I go out now. Everyone calls me the younger brother of a lecherous ghost.”
“Brother, the doctor said one pot of medicine should be boiled down into one bowl of liquid. Your little brother is so smart—I had them boil it into three bowls. I’ll go get you two more bowls later. Once you drink them all, the injuries on your body will be healed.”
So clever it was almost ridiculous.
Chen Bai: “…”
No wonder the medicine in his mouth had barely any taste.
This child was Chen Bai’s younger brother from the same parents, Chen Xiaobu, the young master of the Tingwei Office.
His courtyard was now extremely deserted. Aside from the people who delivered meals, no one else was allowed in. Only Chen Xiaobu, relying on his young age and the fact that no one bothered to argue with him, could sneak in.
As Chen Bai drank the tasteless medicine, he asked, “What’s the situation outside now?”
Chen Xiaobu was currently his only connection to the outside world. Whether the Tingwei Office was putting on an act for the imperial family or for someone else, he had to appear as though he had been left to fend for himself. That way, the Tingwei Office would have an easier time.
Chen Xiaobu said heartlessly, “Isn’t it still the same? A ring of scholars has surrounded our residence. They take turns cursing us from morning until night. These days, I look forward to rain every day, so it can drench them like drowned rats…”
A rat crossing the street, shouted at by everyone. Blockaded at his own gate, stabbed in the spine by writing brushes. It was truly miserable.
Chen Xiaobu continued, “I heard from the servants who went out to buy vegetables that Crown Prince Jiao recently accepted an extraordinary retainer. He can paint extremely realistic pictures, and even the king praised him highly. Now, many famous scholars and great masters go to the crown prince’s residence every day to admire his paintings. Visitors crowd the door, and it’s incredibly lively.”
Chen Bai: “…”
Crown Prince Jiao knew how to recognize talent and make good use of people. What he was proudest of was having a residence full of retainers and strategists, each with their own strengths. Everyone in Shangjing knew it.
Only, Chen Bai was now in such a wretched state, while the other party was enjoying boundless glory. It was truly hard to accept.
“Brother, what’s wrong? Why are your eyes red?”
Chen Bai froze. Just thinking about it had affected him to this extent? The resentment in his heart was truly too heavy.
He composed himself. He really could not drink any more of the medicine water Chen Xiaobu was handing him, so he said, “Remember to tell me whenever you hear any new news.”
Chen Xiaobu nodded, half-understanding. “Brother, if our Tingwei Office collapses, will we have to go out and beg for food? You can hold the big bowl, and I’ll hold the small bowl. We’ll be so pitiful.”
Chen Bai: “…”
After sending away Chen Xiaobu, whose little head was full of who-knew-what thoughts, Chen Bai endured the stabbing pain in his back and walked into the courtyard.
He glanced at the two rough-work old women (a.k.a maid) guarding the entrance to the courtyard. He was currently under house arrest. He walked to a flower bed that blocked their line of sight.
He took out his phone and snapped a photo of the flowers blooming brilliantly in the flower bed. Even the bees flying among them could be seen clearly in the picture.
“A painter who can paint extremely realistic pictures? Visitors crowding the door and boundless glory? A residence full of retainers and strategists, which he’s so proud of? Crown Prince Jiao is living quite splendidly.”
The corners of Chen Bai’s mouth lifted. He opened his phone, found a printing shop, and sent over the photo he had just taken.
“Color printing. Poster size. Once it’s printed, just hang it in your online shop.”
If he did not give Crown Prince Jiao some retribution, how could he be worthy of the injuries and humiliation he had suffered?
