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Even If I Turn Into A Zombie I’m Still Going To Slack Off – CH10

Living Together

Chapter 10: Living Together

There was a janitor’s closet on the first floor of the dormitory building, and inside it was an underground tool room. The solution Chi Xiaoxian mentioned was to lock Liu Xi inside that tool room first.

Chi Xiaoxian knew about the basement because a repairman had been called in once when his dorm’s drain was clogged. He had originally assumed the repairman brought all his own tools, but the man had unlocked the underground tool room inside the janitor’s closet and pulled out a snake drill pipe to clear the drain. Only then did Chi Xiaoxian realize the janitor’s closet held a whole hidden world.

However, the basement was tiny, with just enough room for one person. It had a bit of depth, requiring a ladder to climb down.

After settling Liu Xi in the basement, they removed the ladder and finally locked both the basement and the janitor’s closet doors, leaving the keys to Zhao Yiru so it would be convenient for her to visit and bring food.

Fang Yue reminded her to try to bring someone along when visiting and to avoid lowering the ladder unless absolutely necessary.

“Thank you for the advice,” Zhao Yiru said, stopping him. “Junior, you’re from the School of Life Sciences, right? I remember you won the First-Class Academic Scholarship in your department.”

“What about it?”

“Do… do you think my boyfriend can still be saved?” Zhao Yiru asked with deep anxiety. “You noticed it too, right? His symptoms are different from Li Tong’s. He didn’t attack me, and he even recognized me…”

“Apologies,” Fang Yue said. “I can’t give you a precise answer to that question. However, there are indeed individual differences in how people react to this virus, and these differences might bring a turn of events.”

—

Having settled Liu Xi, the group ran into a dilemma regarding how to handle Li Tong. Li Tong was completely infected. Though he had lost his ability to attack after being tied up, he remained extremely manic, constantly squirming and struggling on the floor.

Putting him outside meant opening the main door, but the heavy iron gate had previously been locked by Li Tong with a sturdy U-shaped lock, and he kept the key on his person. A few students from the student council who worked alongside him looked at each other, none of them quite daring to step forward to search him for the key.

“Will you do it?”

“How about you do it?”

Unable to bear their hesitation any longer, Fang Yue asked directly, “Is the key on him?”

“Probably…” A few people exchanged glances. “He usually keeps it on him.”

Just as Fang Yue reached out to search him, Zhang Wensheng beat him to it.

Zhang Wensheng stepped forward and patted Li Tong’s left pants pocket—empty.

His touch triggered an even fiercer reaction from Li Tong, who thrashed wildly like a stranded fish. Remembering this guy’s atrocious behavior, Zhang Wensheng couldn’t help but lose his temper. He kicked him once, flipped him over, and reached into the right pocket.

He pulled out a ring of keys and held it up for the others to see.

Yet several people shook their heads: “The main door key has a deep blue plastic head. It’s not on this ring.”

“Which room is his dorm?” Fang Yue asked.

“205. He lives alone.”

The group went to Room 205 and used the key labeled “205” on the key ring to successfully open the door.

The moment the door was pushed open, everyone stood frozen.

Aside from the bed Li Tong slept on himself, the other bed was piled high with food—rice, oil, freeze-dried vegetables, jerky, instant noodles, bottled water, and even chips and snacks.

“Holy shit, so much food…”

“He must’ve cleared out the entire lobby shop!”

Everyone was stunned.

Zhang Wensheng couldn’t help but let out a cold sneer: “No wonder he was so eager to lock the dorm gates. Turns out he’d already prepared everything for himself.”

“But didn’t the zombies break out of nowhere?”

“Yeah, wasn’t it a sudden broadcast telling us to return to our dorms?”

“He got wind of it in advance, obviously!”

“Must be nice having a dad who’s a leader in the Ministry of Education—” someone said, drawing out their tone.

“This guy is way too cold-blooded. He knew, but he didn’t tell anyone, and he hid so much food behind our backs.”

“Heh, I was wondering why he never let us into his room and acted so secretive, as if he cared so much about privacy.”

Several people spewed insults at Li Tong, even though half an hour ago, they were student council officers diligently doing errands behind his back.

Though Li Tong’s room contained a lot of items, they were arranged fairly neatly, making it easy for them to search.

While Chi Xiaoxian was tidying up the desk, he noticed some printed study materials Li Tong had left behind.

To his surprise, tucked inside the stack of materials was a copy of the Apocalypse Survival Guide. Not only was the book identical, but even the student ID number in the watermark on the top right corner was the same.

It was actually Li Tong who had printed it!

This confirmed that Li Tong had gotten word in advance, printed the materials, stockpiled supplies, and planned to lock down the dormitory building right from the start.

Yet how could such a cautious, methodical person get infected?

When had he been infected?

—

Half an hour later, they checked every nook and cranny inside and outside the room, but found no key.

Chi Xiaoxian’s gaze suddenly landed on a bag of potato chips resting on his bedframe. The aroma of lime blended with toasted potato wafted into his nose—it was his favorite flavor.

As if possessed, he picked up the bag of chips.

His frequent snacking experience immediately alerted him that the weight of the chips was off. Reaching inside to rummage around, his fingers touched a cold piece of metal. Pinching it out, he saw that it was indeed a key with a blue plastic handle.

Fang Yue took the key, wiped off the grease stains, and caught sight of Chi Xiaoxian still clutching the bag of chips out of the corner of his eye.

“I suggest you don’t keep eating those,” Fang Yue said indifferently. “The key carried a lot of bacteria.”

Chi Xiaoxian let out a sigh: “If he wanted to ruin a bag, he could’ve chosen barbecue flavor. Why did it have to be lime?”

Fang Yue: “…”

—

Before throwing Li Tong outside, Fang Yue fetched a glass bottle and a razor blade, extracting some blood and skin tissue samples from his body to place in the glass bottle, then wrapping it tightly with plastic film.

“Is that stuff dangerous?”

“Of course it is, but the virus should be transmitted through blood. If it were airborne, we would have been infected long ago,” Fang Yue said. “Though calling it a virus is still premature. It’d be great if I could go back to the lab.”

“I can tell—your true love is the lab,” Chi Xiaoxian declared firmly. “You two should just get married and tie the knot.”

“…”

“I do have a question, though.” Chi Xiaoxian rubbed his chin. “You said the ones we met before, including Liu Xi, all broke out immediately upon infection. Why did Li Tong stay in the building all this time and only break out now?”

“There are two possibilities. First, he was infected before entering the building, but due to individual differences, his incubation period was longer.” Fang Yue paused for a second. “I hope it’s the second possibility—that he didn’t actually stay inside the building the whole time and came into contact with a source of infection.”

“Whatever the case, we’ll only know after investigating.” Fang Yue shook his head.

—

The food Li Tong had stockpiled was split up completely among the group. Chi Xiaoxian received half a small bag of rice, a bucket of purified water, and two packets of instant noodles. Just as everyone was about to disperse, a male student from the dorm across from Chi Xiaoxian’s blocked their way.

“I think the people who came into contact with Li Tong and Liu Xi just now need to be checked.”

Everyone froze for a second.

The male student added, “After all, fighting carries the risk of injury and infection. We can’t afford an internal infection breaking out again, so please check yourselves.”

“Self-checking isn’t good enough,” a person beside him chimed in. “It’s best if people who didn’t make contact do the checking, so no one hides an infection like Li Tong did and brings harm to everyone else.”

“What the fuck do you mean?!” one of Li Tong’s friends barked in a rage.

“Am I wrong?” the person snorted.

Just as the two were about to start an argument, Zhang Wensheng interrupted cold-temperedly: “You’re taking it too far. We were the ones who stepped up to deal with Li Tong. Forget about showing gratitude, but harboring malicious suspicions like this—ask yourselves, aren’t you being ungrateful wretches?”

The moment he threw those words out, everyone fell silent for two seconds.

Ultimately, Fang Yue spoke up: “The only ones who made contact were me, Chi Xiaoxian, and Zhang Wensheng. It’ll be enough if we check each other.”

His voice was as calm and composed as ever, carrying an air that commanded belief. The others looked at one another and finally nodded.

Since it was summer, everyone was wearing short sleeves, making it easy to inspect for external injuries. The three checked each other over, and luckily, none of them had any.

—

After a night of chaotic tossing and turning, everyone was exhausted, and Chi Xiaoxian prepared to follow Zhang Wensheng back to their dorm. He let out a yawn and stretched his arms: “Finally, I can go back to my bed and lie down comfortably.”

Zhang Wensheng shook his head, however. “Our air conditioner hasn’t been fixed yet. You won’t be sleeping comfortably tonight—I woke up drenched in sweat twice yesterday.”

“It’s still not fixed?!” Chi Xiaoxian was flabbergasted.

On second thought, the AC had broken down the day before the zombie outbreak. Where would they find a technician to fix it at a time like this?

Zhang Wensheng clicked his tongue: “My clothes were soaked when I woke up. This damn summer is way too hot.”

Chi Xiaoxian: “…”

Taking two quick steps up the stairs, he grabbed Fang Yue, who was about to go upstairs.

Fang Yue’s eyelid twitched slightly: “What is it?”

“Do you have a spare bed in your dorm?” Chi Xiaoxian’s eyes shone brightly, reflecting a look of anticipation. “Could you let me sleep over for a night?”

“I do,” Fang Yue paused slightly. “But I prefer living alone.”

He was probably a bit tired too; his voice carried a faint trace of laziness, giving it a strangely magnetic quality.

This response didn’t exceed Chi Xiaoxian’s expectations.

If Fang Yue had warmly invited him over, that would have been a real miracle.

Chi Xiaoxian pulled at his collar to fan himself. The stairwell was stiflingly hot; he hadn’t noticed while busy earlier, but the moment he stopped, the air felt like it had congealed into boiling porridge.

Just as he turned around to enter his own dorm room, a voice drifted down softly from above.

“Bring your own blanket and pillow. I don’t have spares.”

Chi Xiaoxian almost thought he was hearing things, whipping his head up to look up the stairs.

“No problem!”

Chi Xiaoxian immediately turned on the charm: “Thank you, respected—”

Before he could finish his sentence, he felt the gaze landing on him instantly turn stern.

Adapting smoothly to the situation, Chi Xiaoxian made a zipping gesture across his mouth right away.

Returning to his room, he packed his things in two or three quick moves and trotted happily upstairs, ready to enjoy a blissful night’s sleep.


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Even If I Turn Into A Zombie I’m Still Going To Slack Off

Even If I Turn Into A Zombie I’m Still Going To Slack Off

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Score 9.1
Status: Ongoing Type: Author: Released: 2024
If someone asked Chi Xiaoxian what his ideal life was like, he would definitely say:“Just look at my name and you’ll know. My dream is to live a life where I can slack off to my heart’s content.”Then, a global mutation occurred, and unfortunately, he turned into a zombie.As he watched a massive horde of zombies charge toward humanity in a spectacular frenzy, Chi Xiaoxian simply lay down lazily.The phrase “playing dead” could not have been more perfectly suited to him.Until one day, he encountered Fang Yue in the woods.One human and one zombie stared at each other.Fang Yue weighed the crowbar in his hand, wondering which angle would be best for smashing the zombie’s head, when the zombie suddenly greeted him.Chi Xiaoxian wiped the mud off his face. His eyes were astonishingly clear.“Hey, classmate. Do you remember me?”Fang Yue’s expression remained calm, but inside, a storm was raging.Chi Xiaoxian smiled faintly.“Don’t worry, I won’t eat you. But could you carry me up a tree?”“It’s cooler up there. I want to take a nap, but my limbs aren’t very flexible, so I can’t climb up myself.”Fang Yue: “???”---Many years later, after the world had finally returned to peace, a heroic legend began to circulate.—There was an incredibly powerful man who had led humanity’s defense forces to defeat the zombies, yet he had refused all recognition and remained shrouded in mystery.A certain journalist spent a fortune gathering information and eventually tracked down the hero’s residence.According to rumors, the mysterious hero lived with a remarkably young university professor who had already achieved extraordinary accomplishments in academia.The journalist eagerly went there, hoping to catch a glimpse of the legendary hero.Instead, all he saw was a human-shaped salted fish completely sunk into the sofa.Chi Xiaoxian yawned.“I watched two movies today, so I’m a little tired. How about you come back tomorrow?”Journalist: The incredibly powerful human you told me about?! Did I come to the wrong place?!After confirming the address several more times, the journalist returned the next day and continued the interview with great trepidation.“May I ask what your greatest ability is?”Chi Xiaoxian curled up on the sofa, sipping his drink as he seriously pondered the question.“…Lying around without moving?”Carefree, shamelessly lazy little zombie Chi Xiaoxian (bottom) × Brilliant biological genius and workaholic Fang Yue (top)
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