Chapter 52
Since Lin Song’an had to leave for a business trip the next day, Tan Ning woke up early. It wasn’t from a nightmare; he just jolted awake and couldn’t fall back asleep. He turned to look at Lin Song’an, watching him sleep with a blank expression.
But when the alarm went off, he shut his eyes, pretending to be asleep.
Lin Song’an noticed Tan Ning’s little act, but he didn’t say anything. He got up quietly to wash and dress. Once he had his shirt and trousers on, he came over to the bed, leaning down and gently asking, “Ning Ning, are you awake?”
Tan Ning stayed still.
“Could you help me with my tie?”
Tan Ning’s eyes shot open, meeting Lin Song’an’s amused gaze.
Realizing Lin Song’an had seen through him, he gave up pretending. He didn’t want to part from Lin Song’an at all. Even though he’d often say, “You’re so annoying, I don’t want to talk to you,” he was always eager to see him after work every day. Five whole days apart felt unbearable.
He sat up and tied Lin Song’an’s tie.
His fingers slid from Lin Song’an’s Adam’s apple to the collar of his shirt, pausing as he adjusted the tie at the edges.
He wasn’t very good at it, but Lin Song’an patiently guided him. He learned quickly, and once he’d finished, he smoothed out Lin Song’an’s shirt collar. “Isn’t it cold, wearing so little?”
“There’s a coat over the suit—the black lined one we bought together last week. It’s a bit heavy, but it’s warm. You picked it out perfectly, Ning Ning.”
Tan Ning said nothing.
Lin Song’an glanced at the digital clock. “You’re off today. Will you stay home or head back to campus?”
“I’ll go to school in the afternoon to hand in the hard copy of my case report. The professor asked us to leave it in the storage lockers on the business school’s second floor.”
“When’s the scholarship selection?”
“Early April.”
“That’s soon.” Lin Song’an pinched Tan Ning’s cheek. “Ning Ning, don’t stress yourself out. First, you’re already amazing—top of your class. Second, remember, you have me; I’ll always be here to support you.”
“And lastly?”
“Lastly,” Lin Song’an smiled, “I have to go. Give me a kiss, Ning Ning.”
Reluctantly, Tan Ning leaned over and gave him a quick peck on the cheek.
“If my mom makes things difficult, tell me right away. Don’t keep it bottled up.”
Tan Ning rolled his eyes, lying back down. “Hurry up and leave; the driver’s probably waiting.”
Despite his words, the moment Lin Song’an left, life seemed dull.
He watered the orchids on the balcony, ate breakfast, and found himself with nothing to do.
Eventually, he decided to go to school to meet He Qingrui.
He Qingrui had been overwhelmed with classes lately, stressed to his limit. Finally done with an assignment, he went to the cafeteria to get his favorite spicy hot pot. Just as he was about to pay, a hand reached out from behind and swiped a card.
He turned around to see Tan Ning.
“Whoa, what brings you here? Feels like I haven’t seen you in ages.”
Tan Ning picked out the same mix of meat and vegetables as He Qingrui, and they found a table together.
“What brings you to campus today?”
“Handing in my case report for the law and business program.”
“What’s that for?”
“It’s part of the requirements for the full scholarship.”
“Why worry about that? Your boyfriend’s practically a CEO now! I just heard some people in the library talking about Lin Song’an. One of them said he’s much younger but way tougher than his father, a real powerhouse.”
Tan Ning smiled to himself, thinking, Is that how people see him? But he’s nothing but a big softie.
“So, how’s the internship going at his mom’s company? Is she warming up to you?”
Tan Ning shook his head. “But she’s not rejecting me, either.”
“Well, that’s a start. Society already gives betas a hard enough time. Imagine having to deal with that from your partner’s parents—it’s infuriating.”
“What about you?”
“Me? Dating?” He Qingrui gestured at himself. “I’m too ordinary; no one’s chasing me.”
He Qingrui wasn’t conventionally attractive, with a thin face, high cheekbones, and black-rimmed glasses. But he had a warm, sunny smile, quite different from Tan Ning’s reserved demeanor.
To Tan Ning, He Qingrui was anything but ordinary—he was kind and had a loving family.
“Is there no one you like?”
He Qingrui, a bit embarrassed, teased, “You’ve changed, Tan Ning. Since when are you this nosy?”
Tan Ning chuckled and continued eating.
“Having someone to love is a big deal, you know? I’ve switched dorms twice; out of seven roommates, you’re the only one with a boyfriend. College is full of single people!”
He Qingrui pouted, “Lucky ones don’t know the pain of the lonely.”
Tan Ning blinked innocently.
“That sausage is really good, as is the ramen. I’ve never seen you eat anything besides the standard set meals.”
Usually, Tan Ning would just grab a simple meal with one meat and one vegetable dish.
Much later, he randomly blurted out, “I’ve also tried the rice bowl and scallion oil noodles on the second floor.”
He Qingrui burst out laughing and gave him a thumbs-up. “Impressive, impressive.”
Tan Ning’s college life was two-sided: one side was monotonous, cycling between the classroom, cafeteria, tutoring, and dorm; the other was his secret romance with Lin Song’an.
Looking at it that way, it was impressive indeed.
He Qingrui mentioned he’d seen Zheng Yu recently. “He came out of an internet cafe looking pretty rough. And Xu Qingyang joined a civil service training program with meals, accommodation, and a study room—28,000 yuan a month.”
Tan Ning nodded, feeling little interest in the lives of others.
They chatted as they ate, and on the way back to the dorm, Tan Ning felt as though someone was watching him.
He stopped to look back but didn’t recognize anyone.
“What’s wrong?” He Qingrui asked.
Tan Ning looked again and saw only a group of students heading to their dorms after lunch. He brushed it off as paranoia.
“Nothing. Let’s go.”
The dorm beds were narrow and hard, and Tan Ning had grown unaccustomed to them. But he felt bad for leaving He Qingrui alone, so he decided to stay the night.
Meanwhile, in Shanghai, Lin Song’an, upon hearing this, exclaimed, “Is a boyfriend really less important than a friend?”
Watching He Qingrui fetch water, Tan Ning sprawled on the bed. “He was my first friend in college.”
“And me?”
After a moment’s thought, Tan Ning replied, “You were my hookup.”
Lin Song’an grit his teeth, “You’re killing me here!”
Tan Ning couldn’t help but grin.
The next evening, noticing that Tan Ning seemed distracted, He Qingrui finally shooed him out of the dorm. “Just go back to your mansion already. How many video calls has Lin Song’an tried to make? I’m not about to be your third wheel, so get going!”
Tan Ning could only return to Tianhe Villa.
When he stepped inside and turned on the lights, he felt an unexpected sense of belonging. Even though it was Lin Song’an’s house, he knew every corner, the food in the fridge was what he’d bought, the flowers on the balcony were his, and Lin Song’an’s scent was everywhere.
He was willing to call this place home.
After a slow shower, he lay down on the bed, and Lin Song’an’s call came in.
With a tone full of mock hurt, Lin Song’an asked, “Still hanging out with your best friend?”
Tan Ning shifted to Lin Song’an’s usual side of the bed, resting on his pillow.
Hearing the faint rustling of the soft bedspread, Lin Song’an immediately guessed where he was.
“You’re home?”
“Mm.”
Lin Song’an quickly switched to a video call. After a moment’s hesitation, Tan Ning accepted.
Lin Song’an appeared freshly showered, wearing a bathrobe with damp strands of hair falling across his forehead. His gaze pierced the screen, making Tan Ning instinctively look away.
“I just realized, little cat Tan, you seem to avoid looking me in the eye.”
“No, I’m just looking for…for…the air conditioner remote.” Tan Ning pretended to search the bed, even though the remote was right on the bedside table.
“Turn up the air conditioning a bit.”
Tan Ning knew exactly what he meant.
He turned on his side, deflecting, “Go to sleep. You’ve got a long day tomorrow.”
Lin Song’an said nothing, just stared at him, and Tan Ning’s face turned redder under his steady gaze.
“Ning Ning, why are you wearing button-down pajamas?”
Confused, Tan Ning replied, “I just grabbed them.”
“But there were two pullover options. Why’d you ‘just grab’ the button-down?”
After a few seconds, the realization dawned on him. Flustered, he retorted, “You’re just projecting your dirty thoughts!”
“One button at a time, alright?”
Tan Ning’s breath hitched.
He wouldn’t get away this time.
“Turn up the air conditioning and take off the blanket.”
Lin Song’an’s voice, though gentle, carried an undertone of authority typical of an alpha, and
before Tan Ning realized it, he’d already obeyed.
Wearing his green cotton pajamas, he lay bathed in soft lamplight, his skin even more radiant. His skin bruised easily, even slight pressure would leave marks, and the faint hickeys on his neck and the redness on his chest were reminders of that.
He unbuttoned three buttons.
Though shy, he hid it behind a blank expression, which only made Lin Song’an want him more. He adored the contrast—Tan Ning’s coldness melting under his touch.
“That’s enough,” Tan Ning said, somewhat rigidly.
Lin Song’an chuckled, “Not even close. Keep going, Ning Ning.”
Tan Ning realized he couldn’t split his focus three ways—looking at the screen, removing his clothes, and glancing around to hide his embarrassment. Why am I the only one undressing while Lin Song’an just gets to watch?
But he was too shy to make any demands.
Lin Song’an, thick-skinned as ever, would probably open his robe without a second thought, feeling no shame.
So, Tan Ning tried to distract himself, staring at the ceiling lamp as he pushed his pajama pants down to his ankles.
“Ning Ning, are you warm?”
Tan Ning’s breathing grew uneven, his lips turning pale from biting them. As soon as he released, they flushed a vibrant red. Lin Song’an’s heavy breathing filled the speaker, and Tan Ning’s heart raced in time with it, rising and falling like waves.
“Ning Ning, don’t bite your lip,” Lin Song’an coaxed gently. “I want to hear you.”
“No.”
The strongest resistance Tan Ning could muster was that single word. He thought he wouldn’t be swayed by Lin Song’an’s voice alone. They didn’t even have a pheromone bond, and there was a screen between them, yet he still couldn’t resist.
He didn’t need Lin Song’an to read his thoughts—he understood them himself. Saying “no” was really just masking his desire.
He grabbed Lin Song’an’s shirt from the side of the bed, burying his face in it. Following Lin Song’an’s instructions, he adjusted the camera, and Lin Song’an’s breathing grew even heavier. No matter what he did, it felt insufficient.
“Baby…”
Tan Ning’s legs clenched instinctively.
His heartbeat drummed a frantic rhythm, his body writhing in waves. Releasing his nearly bruised lips, he whispered with a sob, “Lin Song’an… I want you.”
