Chapter 42
“There’s no rice cooked, only chicken noodle soup. Do you want some?” Tan Ning asked.
“Of course I’ll eat.”
Even if it were just plain noodles, Lin Song’an would have eaten them without hesitation, especially if Tan Ning was the one making them.
Tan Ning opened the pot lid. “Lin Qi said you don’t like noodles.”
“Not true. Don’t listen to his nonsense. Whatever Ning Ning makes, I like—chicken noodle soup is delicious, shredded pork noodles are delicious, and your vegetable pancakes are also delicious,” Lin said, hugging Tan Ning tighter. His tone was affectionate. “How are you so amazing, Ning Ning?”
Tan Ning hadn’t even sipped the soup and already felt overwhelmed. Gathering his strength, he pushed Lin Song’an away. “Lin Song’an, act normal.”
“How can I act normal when you look like a little chef?”
Tan Ning didn’t understand. What was wrong with the way he looked? He felt that Lin Song’an’s excitement was a bit strange. Even though he was covered in kitchen aromas, Lin Song’an seemed eager to have his way with him right there.
After finally pushing Lin Song’an away, he quickly stir-fried some vegetables, and dinner was finally ready.
Lin Song’an brought out a bottle of red wine. “Want some?”
Tan Ning thought: Eating chicken noodle soup with red wine seems a bit odd. But he had never drunk alcohol before—not red wine, white wine, or fruit wine. Curious, he nodded and said, “Okay.”
Two bowls of steaming, aromatic chicken noodle soup, a plate of stir-fried vegetables, and two glasses of red wine.
Lin Song’an clinked glasses with Tan Ning, the crisp sound of glass meeting glass resonating with a lingering tone. The red wine with a hint of cherry aroma swirled in the glass.
“Ye Ling came to see you today,” Lin Song’an said, seizing the right moment.
Tan Ning remained calm, biting into a piece of chicken. “Mm.”
“What did he say?”
“Something about pheromones and other repetitive stuff.”
Lin Song’an’s eyes darkened. “I’m sorry, Ning Ning, for making you bear pressures you shouldn’t have to.”
Tan Ning felt that sharing the burden with Lin Song’an and facing challenges together was a good thing—better than Lin Song’an bearing it all alone.
He said nonchalantly, “It’s alright. I thought he would say something harsher. It was just the same old talk, nothing serious.”
Tan Ning was clearly stronger than Lin Song’an had imagined.
After a while, Tan Ning suddenly spoke, “Lin Song’an.”
“Yes?”
“Did you already know about my family situation?”
Lin Song’an was stunned, not knowing how to answer for a moment.
Tan Ning had realized after Ye Ling left that since Ye could easily mention “your seventy-year-old grandfather and remarried mother,” it wasn’t impossible that Lin Song’an had looked into his family background.
“Did you investigate?”
Lin Song’an confessed honestly, “It wasn’t an investigation; I just asked around. No malice intended.”
“What was your first reaction when you heard about my father’s cause of death? Was it disbelief?” Tan Ning held a spoon in his left hand and used chopsticks in his right to pick up hot noodles into the spoon, blowing to cool them. He smiled self-deprecatingly, “It is a bit dramatic.”
“Do you still often think about that scene?”
“Not much anymore.”
Since being with Lin Song’an, he rarely had nightmares because Lin Song’an would hold him in his arms. With someone protecting him, the nightmares couldn’t invade.
“You’re doing great, Ning Ning.”
Lin Song’an always praised him inexplicably. Tan Ning wasn’t used to being treated like a child, so he paused and then awkwardly lowered his head to sip the chicken soup.
“This winter break, I’ll go back with you, okay?”
“Go back for what?”
“To meet your family.”
Tan Ning nearly choked, struggling to stay calm. “It’s too soon.”
“I think it’s too late. If I could resolve things with my mom, I’d propose right now.”
Tan Ning’s ears burned, and he mumbled, “But things aren’t settled with your mother yet. My grandfather will definitely ask.”
Lin Song’an knew the root of the problem lay with him and sighed inwardly. “But no matter what, I’ll accompany you this winter break.”
Tan Ning barely audibly said, “Okay.”
They clinked glasses again.
Tan Ning had never had alcohol and didn’t know his tolerance. After two glasses, he started feeling dizzy. Lin Song’an cleaned up the kitchen, and when he turned around, Tan Ning was slumped over the edge of the sofa, cheeks flushed like peach blossoms, his slender hand hanging off the side, almost falling off.
Lin Song’an washed his hands and went over to hold him.
Ever since Lin Song’an discovered the cuteness hidden behind Tan Ning’s sharp exterior, any small action of Tan Ning’s was interpreted as adorable in his eyes—the furrowed brows, the clenched fists, even his soft, motionless body was irresistibly endearing.
He indulged himself for a moment, then, feeling a pang of conscience, helped Tan Ning get comfortable, holding him in his arms. He softly called, “Ning Ning, Ning Ning.”
Even in his sleep, Tan Ning was annoyed, burrowing into Lin Song’an’s chest, trying to block his ears.
“Ning Ning, do you tell the truth when you’re drunk?”
Tan Ning nodded.
Lin Song’an kissed him gently and whispered, “Ning Ning, do you like Lin Song’an?”
Tan Ning seemed not to hear clearly and murmured.
So Lin Song’an leaned in closer and asked again, “Ning Ning, do you like Lin Song’an?”
“Don’t like.”
“…” Lin Song’an smiled helplessly, looking down into Tan Ning’s drunken, misty eyes. His eyes, originally amber, now looked even more dreamy, like an enchanting illusion.
Lin Song’an leaned closer but was stopped by Tan Ning.
Tan Ning leaned back, propping himself up with his arms behind him, raising his upper body to put some distance between them. Lin Song’an quickly moved closer again, hovering over him, a kiss hovering but not landing.
Tan Ning raised a hand and grabbed Lin Song’an’s tie.
A black tie with silver patterns.
Held and played with by Tan Ning’s slender fingers.
Lin Song’an immediately wanted to take off his suit jacket, but Tan Ning stopped him. “Keep the suit on.”
Lin Song’an raised an eyebrow. “Hmm?”
“Keep wearing the suit. Don’t take off the tie.”
Tan Ning was usually passive in intimate moments; this was the first time he made a request. Naturally, Lin Song’an fully cooperated. He said, “Okay.”
Tan Ning kept holding onto Lin Song’an’s tie, retreating to the head of the bed. As soon as he lay down, Lin Song’an was above him.
Moonlight swayed; shadows of trees rustled.
They both felt like they were on the edge of a cliff, unaware of what risks awaited them in the future. At this moment, entwined tightly, they wished they could merge their souls into each other’s bodies.
*
Lately, Lin Song’an had been spending all his free time with Fang Jin, even cooking a table full of dishes for her using recipes Tan Ning taught him. Although the taste wasn’t as good as Tan Ning’s cooking, the gesture was heartfelt.
Fang Jin approached with a blank expression. “Trying to please me?”
“Not at all,” Lin Song’an helped his mother sit properly, smiling. “Making you a meal is considered pleasing?”
Just then, Lin Yexun returned home. Seeing the sumptuous spread, he noticed that the style and appearance didn’t seem like the housekeeper’s work. So he asked, “Did you make this, Song’an?”
“Of course,” Lin Song’an pulled out a chair, eager. “Try it.”
It was rare for the family to have such a harmonious moment. Even Fang Jin, who was used to awkward silences, didn’t know what to say. For some reason, lately, Lin Yexun had been much gentler with her. He didn’t avoid her temper like before. Now, even when he came home late after socializing, he would stay and chat with her. They talked about many things they hadn’t discussed in over twenty years.
Fang Jin began to waver: What she wanted, of course, was for her precious son to be happy. But wasn’t this moment also a kind of happiness?
“Did that beta teach you these dishes?” Fang Jin suddenly asked.
Lin Song’an glanced at his father, then honestly replied, “Yes, Tan Ning taught me.”
Fang Jin asked again, “What about Ling Ling? How is he lately?”
“I don’t know. He blocked me; I can’t contact him.”
Lin Yexun frowned. “That child wouldn’t do anything harmful, would he?”
“Although Ling Ling is spoiled, he doesn’t have bad intentions. Song’an, have you visited the Ye family?”
“I have. I brought gifts. Uncle Ye said it’s nothing; matters of the heart can’t be forced.”
Lin Yexun looked slightly surprised, then replied, “That’s good. Our families have been close for generations. It wouldn’t be worth it to damage relations over the children’s issues.”
“Yes.”
Lin Song’an added a piece of fish to Fang Jin’s plate. “Mom, try this.”
As the winter break approached, Tan Ning didn’t have much to do. Yue Ying had asked several times when he would come home, and he always said he was tutoring and might be delayed.
Tan Ning didn’t want to go home, but Lin Song’an urged him to, even buying a bunch of gifts, saying he wanted to accompany him to visit his grandfather.
Tan Ning noticed that ever since they reconciled, Lin Song’an seemed eager to settle down. Every day, he’d hug him and say, “When are we getting married? When are we getting the license? Ning Ning, let’s go steal the household registration book.”
Annoyed by his pestering, Tan Ning could only elbow him, saying coldly, “Stop adding fuel to the fire, Young Master Lin.”
Lin Song’an had to restrain himself.
Tan Ning thought: Is the key to whether we get married in my hands?
Fang Jin and Ye Ling’s mocking words still echoed in his ears. The more he thought about it, the more upset he became, and he took out his frustration on Lin Song’an, avoiding him for two days.
Moreover, he heard that Lin Yexun, to ease relations between the Lin and Ye families, had organized a gathering, inviting the Ye family and Yan Zhiyu’s family for a meal. Although the purpose was to clarify the relationships between the children, the thought of Lin Song’an meeting with Yan Zhiyu made Tan Ning uncomfortable.
His intense unease about pheromones surged violently.
He didn’t want to show that he was jealous, so he pretended not to care, burying himself in case studies in the nearly empty library. Lin Song’an sat beside him, holding his hand, gently rubbing his palm with his thumb.
“I’m just going for a meal. I’ll be there at six and back home by eight. Ning Ning, wait for me at Tianhe Villa, okay?”
Tan Ning coldly withdrew his hand.
“Is Yan Zhiyu the hurdle we can’t overcome? Ning Ning, trust me, okay?”
Tan Ning held back his tears.
He just couldn’t get over it; he was afraid.
Time was running out. If Lin Song’an didn’t go soon, he’d be late. Helpless, he squeezed Tan Ning’s shoulder and reassured him, “I’ll make things clear with them. Ning Ning, trust me, wait for me at home, okay?”
Tan Ning remained silent, staring intently at the English case studies in his hands.
Lin Song’an hadn’t wanted to attend, but Lin Yexun had advised him: Avoiding it would only embarrass the parents of all the families. It would be better to sit down openly, have a meal, and express your thoughts. Unlike in his time, when there weren’t even proper medications for the susceptibility period, so there was no reason to resist.
Now, with rapid technological development, medications were being intensively developed. The Yan family was also a pair of open-minded parents who loved their son even more than the Lin family did. They wouldn’t force their son to marry just for social standing and compatibility.
Lin Song’an was persuaded and agreed that constantly avoiding wouldn’t solve the problem.
Tan Ning still wouldn’t speak to him.
Pressed for time, Lin Song’an sighed, stood up, and left. As he walked out of the library and was about to head to the parking lot, he suddenly heard Tan Ning’s voice behind him.
He turned around to see Tan Ning standing alone on the steps, eyes red at the corners, like a frightened kitten afraid of being abandoned.
Lin Song’an immediately walked over and hugged him.
Tan Ning clutched Lin Song’an’s coat tightly, burying his face in his shoulder, struggling to hold back sobs. “I’ll wait for you at home, Lin Song’an. You must be back by eight, or I don’t want you anymore.”
