Chapter 34
Seeing Shi Xiaowang about to cry, Jian Da Meow panicked instantly, his heart tightening along with his emotions.
He pressed close to him, gently rubbed his hand, and looked at him seriously. It’s okay, don’t be afraid.
Shi Xiaowang pressed his lips together, holding back his tears, and pulled up his lightbrain to send a message to Jian Mo.
[Sir, what’s going on with the pollution on Jian Da Meow? You know, right?]
Seeing him send the message, Jian Mo sighed inwardly.
No matter what, revealing his identity now wouldn’t be wise—but he couldn’t come up with a better excuse either.
[He’s been on the battlefield. That’s when it happened. But don’t worry too much. The medicine extracted from the plants you purified works on him too. Meng Zhan also checks his health regularly. He’ll be fine.]
Jian Mo’s reply was honest enough.
Shi Xiaowang’s eyes reddened again as he read it.
[So… what about you now…]
He paused halfway through writing, deleted it all.
Jian Mo watched him without moving. He knew what Shi Xiaowang wanted to ask—and why he deleted it.
Jian Da Meow’s body was already in this state; what good could Jian Mo do now?
Shi Xiaowang realized that Jian Mo had been avoiding the issue all along.
Ever since seeing Major Xin go berserk, he had been avoiding it.
He knew the pollution on Jian Mo would only be worse, but after Meng Zhan comforted him that day, he never asked about Jian Mo again.
He was afraid—afraid that Jian Mo’s condition was beyond his ability to help. He also knew it was inevitable. He wasn’t strong at all; he couldn’t protect Jian Mo.
So he never asked about Jian Mo’s pollution levels, deliberately avoiding the information. In the “it’s okay” world Jian Mo created for him, he magnified only the comforting details.
He could accompany him to the knighting ceremony, make him bracelets late at night, and cook delicious meals.
So how could anything happen to him? He surely would be fine…
Finally, Shi Xiaowang’s tears fell. He looked at the worried lion and hugged him tightly.
“I’m sorry, Da Meow… I’m sorry…”
Jian Mo paused, but still said nothing. He closed his eyes, resting his chin on Shi Xiaowang’s shoulder, listening to his soft sobs.
Shi Xiaowang cried for a long time. When he finally felt exhausted, Jian Da Meow gently carried him back to the bedroom.
Even asleep, he still had tear-streaked cheeks, furrowed brows, and clutched the lion’s paw tightly.
Jian Da Meow bent down and kissed his cheek, wiping away the tears, quietly watching him.
He understood why Shi Xiaowang felt guilty, just as he himself had when he learned the old marshal was about to go berserk.
Why hadn’t they noticed earlier? Why was there no way to treat it…
This kind of guilt was more than regret—it was fear, the fear of losing someone completely.
He watched Shi Xiaowang, feeling deeply pained.
After finally letting him be a little free-spirited, would he have to make him anxious and insecure again…?
Jian Da Meow let out a soft sigh, curling his tail around Shi Xiaowang’s waist, pressing close to him as he closed his eyes.
After an unknown amount of time, Jian Da Meow suddenly woke up.
Shi Xiaowang held him, his purification power flowing like vines from his palms, wrapping around him, slowly seeping into his mental sea.
Seeing the panicked lion, Shi Xiaowang smiled.
“You’re awake. Don’t be afraid. I just wanted to see if I could help purify and heal you a little.”
He had purified so many plants, eggs, and even tried purifying the chicks recently—he just wanted to try.
He wanted to heal Jian Da Meow, and he also wanted to heal Jian Mo.
Hearing him, the lion struggled harder, letting out a sharp, low growl. No! Your spiritual power can’t handle this much consumption!
Shi Xiaowang couldn’t understand what he was growling, but frowned when he struggled, his face paling.
“Don’t move, Da Meow… it might hurt a bit…”
The lion immediately stopped, remembering the fainting after Shi Xiaowang had previously cut off his powers. He looked at the vines on him, fearing he might hurt the fragile things.
Yet he stopped, but Shi Xiaowang didn’t relent.
The vines in the mental sea gathered like lighthouses on a stormy sea. Shi Xiaowang guided them, trying to disperse the catastrophic clouds.
But the clouds weren’t inert. Feeling threatened, they suddenly surged, catching Shi Xiaowang off guard, making him wince in pain.
The lion endured the turbulence in his mental sea, anxiously checking Shi Xiaowang.
Shi Xiaowang didn’t give up. He tried another method, letting the vines gently embrace a small patch of the cloud like a tender hug, but with firm power, slowly eroding it.
His eyes lit up.
“It works!”
The lion was still anxious. Shi Xiaowang’s purification, to his mental sea, was like a tiny stream—helpful, but still insufficient.
He didn’t care how much could be purified; he only worried Shi Xiaowang might overexert himself, causing irreversible harm.
But he couldn’t do anything now. He dared not move, couldn’t turn back into Jian Mo, and couldn’t even message him.
In his memory, no one had ever invaded another’s mental sea. He feared making a mistake and hurting Shi Xiaowang.
Shi Xiaowang’s face grew paler; he could feel his power weakening bit by bit.
Jian Mo, initially anxious, now became fearful and uneasy.
The lion let out a pleading low growl. Stop… please stop…
Until Shi Xiaowang had almost exhausted the last of his powers, the vines on the lion gradually became transparent and dissipated. At the last moment before losing consciousness, he was held by someone and heard Jian Mo’s voice—full of fear, trembling even.
Shi Xiaowang wanted to open his eyes and say it was okay, but he was too tired and drifted off.
When he woke again, night had fallen.
The first person he saw when he opened his eyes was Jian Mo.
Shi Xiaowang froze. He had never seen Jian Mo like this.
The Jian Mo in his memory was steady, reliable, gentle, and witty.
But this Jian Mo looked uneasy, nervous, and fearful, his eyes glinting with a fleeting trace of tears.
“I’m fine…”
Shi Xiaowang finally said the words he had wanted to before passing out, comforting Jian Mo.
“I was just a little tired…”
“Tired?”
Meng Zhan almost laughed in exasperation.
“Do you know your spiritual power almost collapsed just now?”
“I…”
Shi Xiaowang opened his mouth, daring not to make excuses.
He had been overconfident. At first, he only wanted to try, but when he saw it worked, he couldn’t stop, wanting to heal Jian Da Meow completely in one go.
He had overexerted himself.
“Where’s Jian Da Meow?”
Shi Xiaowang looked around. Aside from Jian Mo, only Meng Zhan and Uncle Ye were nearby.
“How is he?”
“Dead.”
Jian Mo said expressionlessly.
“Scared to death by you.”
“…What?”
Shi Xiaowang looked at him, confused.
Meng Zhan circled around them, slightly helpless.
“I sent him to the research institute. Since you caused such a commotion, he needed a thorough check.”
“Oh…”
Shi Xiaowang nodded. That made sense.
For half a day, Shi Xiaowang had felt neither fear nor remorse.
Jian Mo even felt a bit angry.
“Spiritual exhaustion can collapse the mental sea, eventually leading to brain death. Don’t you understand this common knowledge? How could you recklessly purify a lion?”
The last words made Shi Xiaowang frown.
“Doesn’t the lion matter? He’s Jian Da Meow!”
“So what? You’re more important.”
Jian Mo said firmly, without yielding.
“You…”
Shi Xiaowang grew angry.
“Why? Why are you more important? Aren’t we all family? Why protect only me? I can help you! I could protect you, why don’t you believe me? You never come home, I never see you. Don’t you want to see me? I miss you, but I don’t want to be a burden. I don’t dare come to you, I know you treat me well, but I… I don’t want it like this…”
Shi Xiaowang grabbed Jian Mo’s hand as he wiped his tears, looking at him with both grievance and seriousness.
“I don’t want you to always protect me, Jian Mo. I want to protect you too. We’re family, right?”
Jian Mo looked at him, feeling that at this moment, Shi Xiaowang wasn’t holding just his hand—he was holding his whole heart.
“Of course.”
He whispered softly.
