Chapter 33
Watching everyone’s exaggerated acting, Jian Yunlan: “…”
He clearly saw that the fists hadn’t even landed yet, but the other side was already screaming.
“You all better stop, do you really think Boss Jian is a fool?”
“Sigh, it’s pitiful.”
“Sister Wu, for a bowl of fried rice, you’re throwing away your reputation~”
Wu Qiuhe, who was famous for being decisive and strong-willed in this area, actually mingled with the young people and joined in their mischief.
Upon hearing this, Wu Qiuhe’s face turned red.
What’s wrong with that? What’s reputation even worth? Can it be eaten? Is it tasty?
Aren’t you all itching to do something too?
Even though Jian Yunlan had already left on his tricycle, the area around the fried rice stall was still bustling. Some were still hopeful and trying to retain Boss Jian, some were huddled together gossiping about the drama they had just witnessed, and some…
Were begging on the street?
The crowd looked curiously at the little girl by the roadside.
The little girl had a very delicate appearance, with fair skin, a pair of round, dark, grape-like eyes, and was dressed in a cloud-patterned Taoist robe. Her long hair was tied into two small buns at the back of her head.
She arrived right after Jian Yunlan left, perfectly missing the fried rice stall.
The little girl was sniffing the air, seemingly trying to catch the lingering fragrance, while she set up a sign on the ground, with calligraphy in an elegant flourish.
On the left side, it read: “I am Hu Banxian from the Qingqiu Frost Moon Taoist Temple!”
On the right side, it said: “The ancient ferocious beast Taotie and I have a blood feud. Donate 50 to hear my revenge plan.”
She also set up another plastic light board on the ground: “I am skilled in Feng Shui, divination, face reading, PowerPoint making, Photoshop editing, English translation (professional level 8 + CATTI certification), IELTS/TOEFL tutoring, study abroad planning, 50 yuan per session.”
In the center, two QR codes were posted, one green and one blue—very considerate, with both WeChat and Alipay options.
The crowd: “?”
What is this? Is this like “I am Emperor Qin Shi Huang, donate 50 and I’ll make you a general”?
And what’s with being skilled in Feng Shui, PowerPoint making, English translation, and study abroad planning?
Among the crowd, an English major slowly clutched his chest and fell, spitting blood while forcing a smile:
“I told you, our English majors have a broad employment outlook, but you didn’t believe me…”
Others: “…”
So pitiful!
Many gathered around the little girl’s stall, curious, but mostly just to watch the spectacle.
Some teased her, speaking in a high-pitched voice: “Little girl, did you run away from home after arguing with your family? Do you need help finding your parents?”
The little girl gave him a strange look: “Is your throat uncomfortable? Here, let me write you a prescription. Quickly go and get one penny of licorice, dried tangerine peel, two lohan fruits, and some chrysanthemum for water consumption.”
The man: “…”
The crowd burst into laughter.
Most of them just came to watch the fun. The girl’s unusual clothing made them wonder if her parents were hiding somewhere, recording a short video.
After some time, everyone dispersed.
The little girl clutched her empty stomach and pouted.
She was hungry again.
The last meal was a long time ago. While wandering the mortal realm, her life-saving artifact wasn’t with her, and she got hungry quickly.
Her life-saving artifact… her life-saving artifact… sigh.
Just as she was immersed in sadness, suddenly, she heard a voice: “Little girl, would you help me with something? How about my marriage fate?”
It was Lin Tianqiu.
Lin Tianqiu, feeling sorry for the lonely little girl, wanted to help her out. He had just finished eating Jian Yunlan’s fried rice, was in a great mood, and the resentment of being a corporate worker had dissipated. He felt the world was beautiful.
If he could help, why not?
Who knew the little girl furrowed her brow and said, “I don’t read fortunes for marriage.”
Lin Tianqiu: “?”
“Marriage, marriage,” the little girl actually got angry, her whole soft little face flushing red, pouting like a steamed bun, “Everyone’s so troubled by marriage fate, yet they fail to realize that one’s destiny should be in their own hands!”
She huffed, “I’m Hu Dangui, a clear-hearted Taoist nun, born in Qingqiu. I am the youngest nine-tailed fox in all of Qingqiu.”
Since birth, Hu Dangui had been different from other foxes.
Her siblings and predecessors were all obsessed with love. Her eldest brother, for instance, had been entangled with a little dragon prince for several lifetimes, breaking up and getting back together. As a dignified nine-tailed fox, he had even become a male concubine for the prince—completely shameful!
Her eldest sister had once been the most beautiful fox in Qingqiu, hailed as the one most likely to become the next leader of Qingqiu, but she fell in love with the last tyrant of the human world. In an attempt to save him, she even sacrificed her demon core, only to be cursed by the people, who called her a calamity!
Let’s not even talk about her second brother… Once a proud new generation of Qingqiu, but he fell in love with a swordsman and willingly cut off his nine tails just to live a long life with his mortal husband. Who knew, on their wedding night, he was stabbed through the heart by his husband’s sword and killed!
Every time she thought about it, Hu Dangui was furious.
Why was everyone so obsessed with love?
Why not focus on career? Isn’t that better?!
If only these cultivators weren’t trapped by love, Qingqiu would have long since become strong, dominating the mountain and sea realm!
But now, there was only an old fox mountain lord and Hu Dangui, who were barely growing crops and selling Qingqiu agricultural products to survive.
Truly Heartbreaking for Those Who See and Tearful for Those Who Hear.
After ninety-nine days of retreat and contemplation, Hu Dangui suddenly had an epiphany. She realized her great responsibility:
Her birth was destined to save the world from the chaos of love, guiding people to focus on the right path and create a better life!
She decided to travel far and wide, enlightening those who were lost in love.
Hu Dangui had heard that in the countless small worlds, there was one called ‘ABO’, where its inhabitants could go into heat and mate anytime, anywhere… Just hearing that filled Hu Dangui with rage.
If she could go to the ABO world, she would surely take bold action and carry out a complete reform!
But sadly, Hu Dangui’s journey was cut short. Just as she stepped out of the Shan Hai realm, her life-saving artifact was lost.
Rather than being lost, it was swallowed—by the infamous Taotie, who devoured it in one bite.
This was also the reason Hu Dangui appeared in this world—she had been tracking Taotie.
Back to the present.
“Ahem, so besides your marriage fate, what else would you like me to divine?” Hu Dangui cleared her throat and pretended to stroke a non-existent beard, “My powers are profound. Out of mercy, I can help you fulfill one wish.”
Lin Tianqiu, troubled, paused. As a lifelong single dog, the thing he was most curious about was when he would be able to find someone, but since that wasn’t an option, there seemed to be no reason to ask.
The little girl blinked her round, dark eyes, looking very mysterious.
She stared at Lin Tianqiu intently, and Lin Tianqiu, confused, stared back. Suddenly, his mind seemed to go blank, and he couldn’t think of anything, just standing there in a daze.
Meanwhile, Hu Dangui released a thread of divine sense, slipping into Lin Tianqiu’s consciousness.
She thought smugly, let me see what kind of wish a young person in this world might have.
Money, fame, power, or something else? She was a bit curious about what they valued most—memories, people they cherished, and the softest, most untouchable corners of their hearts…
A bowl of fried rice.
A steaming bowl of fried rice, each grain distinct, coated in golden egg yolk, fragrant with aroma.
Hu Dangui: “?”
She couldn’t believe it, so she strained her ears, trying to listen to Lin Tianqiu’s most intense obsession, his most desperate desire, his unspeakable scream:
—”I really want another bowl of fried rice, aaaaah!” (breaking voice)
Hu Dangui: “???”
You humans… may be beyond saving.
Lin Tianqiu felt his consciousness blur, as if his soul had momentarily left his body, but his awareness quickly returned.
“What the hell was that?” He blinked and looked around, wondering if he had encountered a ghost.
The little girl in front of him, with wide eyes and a somewhat strange expression, asked, “Fried rice? Is fried rice really that delicious?”
“Super delicious!” Lin Tianqiu said, cupping his face, “It’s so good. Boss Jian is the best food stall owner in the world!”
“You have no idea—his fried rice is so fragrant and delicious. Sometimes it’s savory, sometimes with sausage, sometimes sour and spicy—just so flavorful!”
Even Hu Dangui felt a bit tempted.
She had been hungry all day, and now saliva was almost dripping from her mouth.
But Hu Dangui swallowed a mouthful of saliva and forced herself to suppress the urge, asking:
“That Boss Jian you’re talking about… what’s his view on matters of love? Or, say, on male-male relationships?”
She would never eat the fried rice of someone with a love-stricken brain!
“Huh?” Lin Tianqiu scratched his head.
That was a strange question.
“Well, I guess he’s supportive?” Lin Tianqiu said, “There was a couple who got engaged at his stall, and he congratulated them and even saved some fried rice for them.”
Although from what he’d seen, Boss Jian didn’t seem interested in relationships himself.
Hu Dangui: “…Hmph.”
It seems that mortals are, after all, bound by convention.
Hu Dangui made a decision. Tomorrow, she would visit that fried rice stall owner. She was going to teach him that indulging in romantic love was not the right path, and that focusing on oneself was the true way!
It absolutely wasn’t because she wanted to try a bite of fried rice or anything!
*
The Multiverse Realm.
At the headquarters of the Multiverse Live Streaming Company, a towering skyscraper, Gong Siyuan, the live-streaming supervisor for the Book Crossing Area, walked into the meeting room with a stack of reports. She was wearing a professional pencil skirt and red-frame glasses, exuding a competent and capable aura.
“Good morning, Manager Gong!”
As soon as she entered, everyone stood up quickly and greeted her with a bow.
Gong Siyuan nodded slightly, diving straight into the topic. “Sit down. Did everyone see the live stream data from last night?”
She scanned the room and pointed to someone. “Xiao Li, you go first.”
“I did,” Xiao Li responded with a start, standing up. “Last night, in the dog-blooded BL novel Paranoid Possession world, one of the streamers had an outstanding performance and even made it into the top ten of the daily ranking in the Book Crossing Area.”
“Mm,” Gong Siyuan nodded. “Let’s discuss this.”
The crowd exchanged glances and whispered among themselves before beginning the discussion:
“Is there a possibility that the data for this streamer is fabricated? At 2 a.m., a large influx of viewers from other platforms entered his stream. It’s suspicious.”
“No, I checked the data for streamer ‘Jian Yunlan’ from the last half month. It’s absolutely real.”
“Most other streamers rely on platform recommendations for traffic, but this streamer is a newcomer. It’s his first time in this world… no agency contract, no recommended spot, yet he made it to the Paranoid Possession hot list!”
“Seems promising, there’s a lot of commercial value to explore. We can think about what kind of advertisements would be appropriate.”
“What’s the theme and style of his live stream?”
At this question, Xiao Li’s colleagues in the project team exchanged troubled looks.
Xiao Li, who had spoken first, trembled a little and said, “Food… street food?”
The room fell silent.
Like other viewers, Xiao Li had been skeptical at first—why were all the other streamers following plots, but this one was just selling street food? Did he have some special strategy?
But there wasn’t.
The streamer was really just selling street food, with no extra actions, yet he always seemed to inadvertently push the plot forward.
Now, the plot progression of Paranoid Possession had already reached 49%!
That was higher than many other streamers who were diligently following the plot.
Seeing the confusion in her colleagues’ eyes, Xiao Li scratched his head and brought up a holographic screen, saying, “Please watch this VCR.”
The video was the one that had gone viral on video-sharing websites yesterday, the one titled “Main character couple fighting intensely, gasping and colliding.” It had already reached tens of millions of views and was nearly becoming a trending meme.
After the video ended, the room fell into even more awkward silence.
“…”
“You’re telling me that Ning Sheng and Gu Xingzhou fought over a bowl of fried rice…?”
Xiao Li trembled and nodded.
His colleagues’ faces turned serious.
Having worked in the Book Crossing Area for so long, Paranoid Possession was one of the most difficult dog-blood novels to crack. No streamer had ever successfully adapted it in all these years.
The most famous part of Paranoid Possession was the bittersweet, entangled, heart-wrenching tug-of-war between the main characters, which brought countless readers to tears while watching. They would throw gifts to the streamers modifying the plot, and buy character-related merchandise.
Yes, not just Paranoid Possession, but many live-streaming rooms in the Book Crossing Area primarily recommended merchandise related to the original works.
For example, the ambiguous photos of Ning Sheng and Gu Xingzhou interacting, the same style of shirt that Gu Xingzhou gave to Ning Sheng, or the silver chain on Ning Sheng’s wrist that looked both forbidden and tempting.
But after watching this video of the main characters fighting over fried rice, not only did the readers lose all desire to buy any merchandise, even the streamers themselves had no interest!
Moreover, the characters’ personalities had completely collapsed. Wasn’t this ruining the brand?!
“Feels like… this Jian Yunlan’s live stream has a lot of heat, but the commercial value is low because the conversion rate for merchandise purchases is so poor. It’s better to reduce exposure.”
Someone suggested.
Dog-blood novels were a huge selling point for the Book Crossing Area. Over the years, while they hadn’t achieved dazzling results, they had always generated a steady income.
This action, though, would miss a lot of traffic. At least it would keep a base level of income.
However…
Gong Siyuan pondered for a moment and said, “No. The flow of traffic is far more exaggerated than you think, and its potential is limitless.”
If they couldn’t seize this wealth right in front of them, how would their department survive in the future?
Gong Siyuan waved her hand decisively, her eyes flashing with brilliance.
“He likes selling street food? Let him sell street food. If the original merchandise can’t sell in his stream, then don’t sell it. We can change our approach.”
“…Won’t the audience get hungry watching food live streams?”
When this was said, everyone suddenly understood.
Ah, there’s that trick!
Yes, Jian Yunlan might not be able to sell merchandise, but he could sell snacks! While watching his stream, the audience would surely get hungry. Snacks are cheap and can be delivered right to their door, so they’ll definitely buy them. What’s there to worry about making money?
Using dog-blood as a gimmick, but actually running a snack business—it was a way to hook people in.
This is something!
It seems experience really counts. Everyone looked at Gong Siyuan with admiration.
“Manager Gong, several talent agencies have contacted us wanting to sign Jian Yunlan. Should we arrange something and recommend him to an agency once the Paranoid Possession challenge ends?”
Someone asked.
Gong Siyuan thought for a moment and replied, “Not yet. I plan to wait until Paranoid Possession ends, then send him to the next world for some more training and see if this business model will really work.”
As for the next world, Gong Siyuan already had a plan in mind.
Dark River, Bright Lamp—an ABO world with pseudo-incest themes, a classic that has never faded in the Book Crossing Area’s dog-blood novels.
Dark River, Bright Lamp was even more difficult than Paranoid Possession. Every year, a continuous stream of challengers were defeated by it.
… It was the perfect challenge for someone like Jian Yunlan, a newcomer with unlimited potential.
She wanted to see if Jian Yunlan was just lucky, or if he actually had some skill.
Suddenly, a colleague whispered, “Have you thought about it? What if he pushes the plot to 60% and directly breaks through the Paranoid Possession world?”
If the plot of Paranoid Possession reaches 60%, the world will be unlocked, synchronized with the flow of time, and no more book-crossers can enter.
In other words, once the plot of Paranoid Possession is solved, there will be no more live streaming or challenges in that world, and it will be removed from the Book Crossing Area’s list of options.
Upon hearing this, everyone was stunned for a moment.
Indeed, Jian Yunlan was pushing the plot too quickly; in just half a month, it had already reached 49%! If it continued at this pace, there was a risk of breaking through.
But after exchanging glances, they quickly dismissed their doubts.
“It’s not like no one has reached 59% before, but 60% is a hurdle.”
“Did you hear? The most professional team came to challenge before and got stuck at 59%… the difficulty lies in Ning Sheng and Gu Xingzhou—they won’t reconcile. It’s impossible for them to reconcile.”
“No matter how hard they try, it will only be a bad ending.”
… And then the timeline would be reset again, returning to the starting point.
Over and over.
The people living in the Paranoid Possession world didn’t know that they had no future at all. Their lives would keep repeating in a short span of one year, being shown repeatedly to the audience.
Their time was frozen.
“In his live stream, Ning Sheng and Gu Xingzhou are still fighting, how can they reconcile?” Gong Siyuan smiled lightly, her tone casual. “If he can break Paranoid Possession, I…”
“I’ll do a live stream eating ¥##@#@%!”
Her colleagues: “?”
Wait, what are you eating in the live stream?
Could you clarify, please?!
*
Jian Yunlan rode his tricycle back to the villa.
It had rained today. Although there was a rain cover, Jian Yunlan still got pretty wet.
So, as soon as he returned to the villa, the butler came over with concern. “Young master, the bath water is ready. You should take a bath to warm up, be careful not to catch a cold~”
Jian Yunlan eagerly agreed. He couldn’t deny it—life for the rich was all about enjoyment.
After taking a bath, he felt all his fatigue wash away. Jian Yunlan was in a great mood. The last few days of street vending had gone really well, and he felt more energized and positive. Even his skin condition had improved.
Wrapped in a bathrobe, as he stepped out of the door, Jian Yunlan felt something under his foot.
He looked down carefully—
At the bathroom door, there was a body lying flat.
The body had silver long hair spread out, clothes half undone, revealing well-defined muscles. But the handsome face carried a faint air of death, with a trace of transcendence. It looked like the person had been dead for quite a while.
Jian Yunlan: “…”
Wait, no, it’s not a body, it’s Taotie!
Next to Taotie, there was a laptop with a report on it. The word count at the bottom left of the screen showed exactly 2,000 characters, including both Chinese and English characters and punctuation marks.
The contents of the report read:
“As Taotie, I bear a heavy responsibility. I traveled widely as a child…”
In order to reach the word count, Taotie had written as if from the beginning of the world, which was quite reminiscent of Jian Yunlan’s own style back in the day.
Seeing the almost-dead Taotie, Jian Yunlan immediately felt a chill run down his spine.
Great, if Taotie turns into a ghost, will it come to take his life?
At this point, even someone as cold-hearted as Jian Yunlan couldn’t deny it. He turned and went to the kitchen, cooked three dishes and a soup, and carefully woke up Taotie:
“Taotie, wake up!”
Taotie opened his eyes in a daze, his vision gradually coming into focus.
What came into view was Jian Yunlan’s face. For once, Jian Yunlan’s face showed concern, his eyes were glistening with moisture (from fear), looking at him with a wet gaze.
Jian Yunlan was holding the three dishes and a soup in his hand.
Sweet and sour spare ribs, stir-fried pork, scrambled eggs with tomatoes, and a seaweed rib soup…
Though these were ordinary home-style dishes, under Jian Yunlan’s god-like cooking skills, they gave off an incredibly tempting fragrance, almost glowing like golden light.
Looking at this surreal scene, Taotie peacefully thought:
“Perhaps I really have passed on.”
Is this the afterlife?
Quite nice. Quite nice indeed.
Since he was already dead, he could naturally do whatever he wanted. Taotie sat up, his golden pupils flashing with a fervent light. While devouring his food with chopsticks, he said to Jian Yunlan:
“Human, I still want hotpot, barbecue, and the Three Freshes with Guo Bao Rou.”
“I want a vacation, I’m not working anymore. I want to go to the beach, eat watermelon, and sunbathe.”
“You must obey me in everything, and fulfill my every wish. Stay with me—yes, I want to drink Mixue Bingcheng. Go buy it for me now.”
… The mighty ancient beast’s posthumous wishes turned out to be so humble.
After a brief silence.
Jian Yunlan said seriously, “You see clearly, I am your master, not a wishing well.”
Taotie: “?”
Good job Taotie for finishing that essay!!
Lol. The first thing he requested is mixue.