I Really Am Just a Substitute – CH18

Chapter 18

“You—you—you said what!?” The PD’s jaw almost hit the floor.

Everyone around froze like statues.

Ning Zhou rubbed his nose tip, then cautiously smiled at the camera, trying to fix it, “Uh, I mean—being alive is nice, but dying’s fine too…”

The PD slapped his thigh with a loud crack.

Pointing at Ning Zhou, his finger shook violently, “Quick! Staff, tie him up with extra safety ropes. Not one, but two more layers of protection!”

He turned to Director Zhang, “Director Zhang, you did buy insurance for the guests, right?”

Director Zhang stroked her chin, “Don’t worry, it’s covered. After this episode, I’ll even get a few more personal safety policies for Ning Zhou…”

[Look at the PD being scared to death—didn’t even bother switching mics before rushing to discuss with the director. Now the whole livestream knows Ning Zhou is such a handful that he needs extra insurance…]
[“Vase”: with one line, I made the entire production crew tremble! /dog-head/]
[Sorry, but the PD and director’s leaked convo was just a tiny bit too funny!]
[“Vase” reminds me of a capybara… that animal with unshakable emotional stability.]
[Exactly! Always calm, unbothered, detached from life—capibala~]
[Death, holding a scythe: You’re going to die. Ning Zhou: Oh.]

The staff came forward, clipped a safety rope onto Ning Zhou’s harness, and tugged on it several times to check, “This is the sturdiest rope in the whole climbing gym. No way it’ll let you get what you want!”

“…It’s not like I actually want to die.” Ning Zhou’s lips twitched. “Anyway, thanks for the hard work.”

The crew finished securing the others and gave the director team an OK signal.

The PD started the stopwatch, “Timing begins now! Remember, all five of you must reach the top for this to count as a success!”

Thirty minutes sounded generous, so the guests gathered around Ning Zhou, laughing, “Nicely done. The way the crew tortured us in that first mini-game, you were definitely scaring them on purpose, right? Hahaha!”

“Did you see their faces just now? Priceless!”

“Ning Zhou, your mindset is on another level—getting revenge so effortlessly!”

Ning Zhou: ?

His eyes were pure and blank. He mumbled, “Mm, right… let’s focus on the task at hand.”

Tong Rong’s phoenix eyes drooped in hesitation as she looked at the climbing wall, “I’ve never tried this before…”

“Me neither.” Zeng Yunsheng fiddled with his rope curiously. In his plain clothes with the harness, he looked like a construction worker.

“Worker Zeng” suddenly had an idea, “So we’re just supposed to climb with our bare hands? Can’t we just pull ourselves up with this rope?”

The PD cut in mercilessly, “No using the rope to assist, or the challenge fails!”

Yu Tong tugged the rope out of Zeng Yunsheng’s hands, “I’ve learned a little before. Follow my lead.”

“Alright!” Fu Binhong agreed, his stomach bulging against the harness straps. “Thanks to Xiao Ning, we can pick our own route. Which one’s the easiest?”

The climbing wall had several routes marked out, each with scattered holds, all of similar difficulty.

Yu Tong stepped back, scanning the wall. She analyzed, “They’re pretty similar… The route Ning Zhou picked just now is more beginner-friendly.”

She frowned slightly, suspicious, “You figured that out in such a short time?”

Ning Zhou waved it off, “I just picked at random. This is my first time too.”

“Is that so…”

Yu Tong didn’t think too much about it. She grabbed a hold and started up, “I’ll go first, follow my path.”

She had played basketball during her career—excellent body strength and contact ability. Both her arms and legs were strong, making her well-suited for climbing.

Ning Zhou followed right behind, his fingers gripping tightly, his lean core twisting with flexible movement.

In just five minutes, the two of them reached the top.

[I was so sad when Sister Yu retired. Maybe she should consider competing in climbing for the next Olympics? /peeks/]
[No way. Aside from whether she’s pro level, Yu Tong definitely has to help run Yu Corp…]
[These two are so badass! They made it look easy—giving me the illusion I could do it too.]
[Petition for a pool episode—I’m starving for their waistlines. Just one glimpse! One! /drools/]
[Kinda embarrassed to call Ning Zhou a “vase” now. It’s not just the face… the body too, huh. /side-eye smile/]

The PD checked the clock, jittering his leg in frustration, “They’re going way too smoothly. Did we make the task too easy?”

Director Zhang was perfectly calm, even leisurely scrolling the livestream data, “Relax. Two going smoothly doesn’t mean the whole team will.”

The PD took a breath, looked over—and sure enough, Zeng Yunsheng was clinging to the middle of the wall, unable to go up or down.

“Help! I can’t move! Somebody save me!”

Ning Zhou and Yu Tong quickly reached down, grabbed his clothes, and hauled him up.

But before Ning Zhou could catch his breath, the other two also got into trouble…

Fu Binhong, over forty and with a belly, bounced against the wall like a balloon; Tong Rong, with her thin arms, lacked the strength.

Ning Zhou tried to help them one by one, but unlike with Zeng Yunsheng, these two couldn’t even get through the lower half on their own—there was no way for them to meet up top.

After all that effort, it was all in vain…

The PD, smugly watching the mess, reminded them leisurely, “Ten minutes left. Hurry up!”

That last straw broke the camel’s back. Tong Rong panicked, her grip failed, and though she had made it halfway up, she slipped back down…

The safety rope caught and lowered her gently.

She lay on the mat like a burnt fish, unable to even flip over: “It’s over… my arms are completely done.”

Fu Binhong still refused to give up. He tried again, his belly squashing against a hold. He scratched at it desperately, but soon he too was lowered by the rope…

[No chance. All members reaching the top is basically impossible. I’ve tried an intermediate wall—it’s brutal for anyone without strength training.]
[But the three on top keep shouting down tips. Not giving up on teammates—even in the first episode, the sports group shows real team spirit! /thumbs up/]
[So frustrating. Can’t they just pull them up with the rope?]
[The PD already banned that option. With just minutes left, hope is slim…]

Exhausted, Fu Binhong and Tong Rong looked up at the wall, like it was a sheer cliff.

“Sorry… we’re the ones dragging everyone down…”

“Don’t say that!”

Ning Zhou suddenly shouted back, lifted his head, and scanned the climbing gym from above.
He confirmed that the safety rope was still working, then leapt down—

“Huah—”

The directors, staff, other guests, and even the viewers on the other side of the screen all gasped, their eyes following that figure.

Ning Zhou landed softly, let the staff help him unclip the rope, then darted into the shadows…

Fu Binhong and Tong Rong exchanged glances, “Did he come down to save us?”

“Could there be some one-minute strength-boosting method?”

“…Really?”

“If it’s the legendary volleyball team, maybe they do have some secret training techniques!”

The camera turned toward the direction where Ning Zhou disappeared. A moment later, he came lugging over a folding ladder, set it up in front of the climbing wall, “You guys can just climb this!”

Tong Rong gaped, “How is there even a ladder?”

“No, that’s not the point right now…” Fu Binhong swallowed hard. “Xiao Ning, I thought you came down to teach us some special rock-climbing skills.”

While fiddling with the ladder, Ning Zhou looked surprised, “Special skills? I’ve never learned any. No time—rather than improve myself, it’s better to use tools!”

[Damn, what he said makes so much sense…]
[I know I should be roasting him right now, but I honestly can’t refute that. /screaming/]
[Capybara stays stable as always: calm emotions, crazy moves, quotable lines.]
[The cameraman must be shocked—the footage is shaking.]
[Don’t worry, cameraman bro, I feel the same way…]

As everyone’s thoughts tangled, Ning Zhou unfolded the ladder and gestured for Fu Binhong and Tong Rong to climb first.

“No way!” The PD slapped the table, his brows twisting. “Climbing with a ladder—what kind of rock climbing is that? You must rely on your own strength!”

On top of the wall, Zeng Yunsheng retorted, “That’s not what you said about the rules!”

“Yeah, you only said we can’t use the safety rope, not that we can’t use tools!” Yu Tong banged the wall to get their attention. “Hurry, time’s running out!”

The PD gritted his teeth, counting down in his head, “Even with the ladder, they won’t make it…”

Fu Binhong and Tong Rong climbed the ladder and were pulled up by those above.

At this time, the PD was already counting aloud, “Five, four…”

Just as he was about to forbid Ning Zhou from using the ladder and declare “challenge failed,” he realized Ning Zhou had somehow reattached the safety rope and was scaling the wall, reaching the top—At the exact last second, all five had made it!

[Hiss, they really made it, my palms are drenched!]
[That “vase” climbed like lightning in the end! Sports team has its own Spider-Man!]
[No wonder he’s a volleyball setter—finger grip strength max.]
[PD tortured the team with rules in the first game, now he’s fallen to the rules himself…]
[Delightful! Completing a task isn’t just about brute force—you gotta use your brain!]
[That “vase” did amazing! Single-handedly turned the tide! /cheering/]

“Chal… challenge… succeeded.”

The PD’s lips trembled as he forced the words out.

His gaze fell on the ladder that had saved the day, unable to hold back his burning question, “Where did the ladder come from!?”

The staff looked at each other, then all turned blankly toward Ning Zhou…

After the guests were safely brought back down, Ning Zhou lifted his hands so the staff could unclip him, looking a little silly, “The ladder was just leaning against the wall by the entrance tunnel. Right behind the cameraman Sister Yu waved to. I confirmed the direction from the top, went to check, and it was still there—so lucky!”

PD, “Huh?”

At Director Zhang’s signal, the live broadcast replay was pulled up—

When the sports team first appeared, Yu Tong had blown a kiss, then the camera switched, showing Ning Zhou accidentally waving to the wrong lens…

The broadcast paused, zoomed in behind the cameraman, and sure enough, in the shadows sat a folding ladder.

At that moment, the audience’s hairs stood on end.

They finally realized—the so-called “vase” wasn’t simple at all…

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