Hello, Jie Fen – CH121

Chapter 121 (Extra)

Xie Siheng had been dealing with insomnia for quite a while. The light bluish tint beneath his eyes looked even more pronounced against his cool, pale skin.

Because he was tall and exuded a powerful aura when his face was expressionless, most people didn’t dare stare at him for too long. Even if they did, it wouldn’t be easy to notice the faint shadows under his eyes.

Chi Wang only touched him for a moment before quickly withdrawing his hand. With a bit of concern in his voice, he suggested, “You really need to take care of yourself. If you can’t sleep, maybe you could try some soothing music? I’ve read about white noise that replicates the environment of a womb—it helps people feel like they’re back in the embryo stage or something. It’s the same reason it’s easier to fall asleep on rainy days. You might want to give it a try.

“And don’t rely on sleeping pills forever—they’re not great for your brain. Maybe consider traditional Chinese medicine. They say TCM is pretty good for insomnia: sour jujube seeds, foot soaks, getting some sunlight… I think it’s worth a shot.”

Chi Wang was seriously trying to come up with solutions, while Xie Siheng just kept gazing at him, lost in thought for reasons unknown.

Noticing the lack of any obvious reaction, Chi Wang sighed. “Sometimes I feel like I really don’t understand you.”

He was used to reading people—deciphering their actions, micro-expressions, and so forth to figure out what kind of person they were. But none of that seemed to work on Xie Siheng.

They had grown up together, so they shared some sort of bond, but Chi Wang himself couldn’t say how deep it went. Xie Siheng always felt somewhat lofty and distant, like the moon—no matter who approached, all they got was its chilly glow.

After Xie Siheng went off to college, even Zuo Qianxing complained about his bad temper. Chi Wang hadn’t personally experienced that, but indeed, once Xie Siheng started university, their contact pretty much dropped off.

No matter how close you are as kids, once you grow up, you inevitably drift apart—even with real siblings. Of course, he and Xiao Fu hadn’t reached that stage yet, but Chi Wang believed that after they each got married someday, the closeness would fade. It was just how life worked. No relationship remains the same forever.

He’d come to accept that. Even with this childhood friend, he was prepared for them to eventually become virtual strangers.

While he was mulling that over, Xie Siheng suddenly spoke. “I’ll give it a try. Thanks.”

Chi Wang raised an eyebrow, then smiled. “Great.”

He lifted the bag containing the watch. “If you’re giving this to me, I’ll just accept it. Thank you. I’ve never had such an expensive timepiece before—but it’ll take me a year or two to save up for the return gift.”

Xie Siheng responded in the same way: “No need for a return gift. It’s pointless.”

Chi Wang said, “Might be pointless for you, but it means something to me. I don’t want you doing all the giving.”

He didn’t want to bicker further, so he simply unboxed the watch and handed it over with a bright grin. “In that case, mind helping me put it on again?”

Glancing down, Xie Siheng took the watch and briefly clasped Chi Wang’s hand before letting go. Then he carefully fastened the watch around Chi Wang’s wrist.

“Come to H University,” he said in a low voice. “I’m at H University.”

Chi Wang scratched his head, puzzled by the logic. “Just because you’re at H University, I’m supposed to go there too?”

“…”

Xie Siheng said, “H University is one of the country’s top three universities. G University is outside the top ten.”

That was a strong argument. But Chi Wang still retorted, “Yeah, but H University is too far. I don’t want to be so far from home.”

In a subdued tone, Xie Siheng said, “You’re going to college for your future.”

“I know. But G University’s still decent, right? Everyone has their own choices.”

Xie Siheng’s jaw tightened. After a pause, he conceded, “You’re right.”

Chi Wang pressed on, “Did you come all the way here just to recruit me for your university? There’s still half a year before the exams, y’know.”

“…Mm.”

Suddenly, Chi Wang burst out laughing. “Actually…you want me to go so we’ll be at the same school, right?”

He said it casually. But right after he finished, Xie Siheng merely looked at him and didn’t reply.

Chi Wang: “…”

His gaze wavered, and he started to stammer. “Is…is that it for real?”

Xie Siheng averted his eyes, looking away. His face remained as cool as ever. “Yes.”

Chi Wang: “…”

He was stunned. So Xie Siheng had been pushing him to choose H University because he wanted them to study at the same university? Wow. He’s so reserved but…

Chi Wang thought for a moment. “It’s still too early. How about I give you my answer later?”

After all, H University truly was a great school, but both Yang Qingdai and Xiao Fu seemed unwilling to see him go so far from C City. Chi Wang’s preference had been G University for that very reason—so he could come home every weekend.

Yet he was fully aware H University was indeed better; from a practical standpoint, it was the smarter choice. The only real downside was how far away it was. Score-wise, Chi Wang wasn’t worried; he’d been in the top three of his school all along, so he felt more than capable of getting into H University.

Xie Siheng didn’t push him, simply giving a terse, “Alright.”

—

Chi Wang soon found, though, that Xie Siheng started contacting him more often. Sometimes just everyday greetings, other times invites to play basketball. This shift felt odd, but Chi Wang didn’t dwell on it. More contact naturally made Chi Wang’s leaning toward H University grow stronger.

By the time the college entrance exam approached, Chi Wang was seriously considering H University after all. It was indeed a better choice, if a bit further from home, so he discussed it with his parents. Chi Runyu was supportive, while Yang Qingdai had no objections—she’d once fallen short of H University by some 10+ points, so she’d be thrilled if Chi Wang went. Only Xiao Fu was unhappy about the idea. Sure, H University was an excellent school, but it was also where Xie Siheng was, and Xiao Fu couldn’t shake a bad feeling. He couldn’t explain it well, but after so many entanglements with “gay guys,” he felt the way Xie Siheng looked at Chi Wang wasn’t exactly innocent, and it worried him. Also, in H City, Xiao Fu had fewer allies who could keep an eye on Chi Wang. No matter how you looked at it, it made him uneasy.

Still, no one paid much attention to those “random thoughts,” and once everyone else gave the okay, Chi Wang officially wrote down H University as his first choice.

When the decision was certain, he felt an inexplicable joy and sense of stability. It was an odd little thrill that made him instinctively pick up his phone, wanting to text Xie Siheng. But halfway through typing, he hesitated, then deleted it.

That evening, a message from Xie Siheng popped up, short and to the point: “Did you fill out your college preference yet?”

Chi Wang answered quickly: “Yeah.”

He deliberately held back from elaborating, enjoying making Xie Siheng ask the questions.

Sure enough, Xie Siheng followed up: “Which university?”

Chi Wang: “G University.”

For a while, there was no reply. Then finally: “Great.”

Even without seeing his face, Chi Wang sensed the disappointment. Oddly enough, that disappointment made him feel that Xie Siheng was more real, less like a cool, distant deity on a pedestal and more like an ordinary mortal with genuine emotions. And Chi Wang found he preferred that. It was easier to feel close to him. He had fun noticing how each word from Xie Siheng could evoke little surges of emotion.

Sometimes, Chi Wang felt he was being a bit mischievous, even borderline teasing. He smiled down at his phone, but didn’t type. Instead, he pressed and held the audio recording button:
“I was just messing with you—I put down H University. We’ll be schoolmates soon. I guess I’ll call you ‘Senior.’ You gonna help carry my luggage on registration day?”

A long while passed. Finally, a curt reply: “Sure.”

Even that mild response felt different, as though some nuance in Xie Siheng’s tone had changed. Chi Wang wanted to ask “Are you happy?” but in the end, he said nothing more.

*

With the exam results in, Chi Wang officially became a college freshman. He was younger than most, still not of legal age, so his parents and brother all came along on move-in day. On arriving at his dorm, two of his new roommates were already there. Instantly, Xiao Fu started handing out the gifts he’d prepared, asking them to look after Chi Wang. Mortified, Chi Wang tugged at his sleeve, but Xiao Fu couldn’t be bothered. Then Yang Qingdai offered some of her homemade braised snacks, while Chi Runyu busied himself helping Chi Wang unpack and make the bed—everyone had their role.

After his family left, Chi Wang turned to the two roommates. “My brother’s just worried about me… um, I’m Chi Wang—Chi as in ‘arrive late,’ Wang as in ‘hope/moon-gazing.’”

They introduced themselves in turn:
“I’m Luo Lianyun from H City—Luo of the Three-Luo Rivers, Lian like in ‘link,’ and Yun meaning ‘clouds.’”
“I’m also from H City—Shu Tingyu. Shu as in ‘comfort,’ Ting as in ‘palace courtyard’ (ting), and Yu as in ‘jade.’
“And we have a fourth roommate who arrived long ago but chose off-campus housing, so he won’t be coming. If you need extra space, feel free to use his bed.”

After only half a day, Chi Wang felt that both roommates were quite nice and easy to get along with. Relieved, he realized he’d never before lived in a dorm—he’d worried about potential conflicts, but it seemed fine.

In the end, he hadn’t chosen computer science after all. While reading about the majors, something about electrical engineering caught his eye. He couldn’t say why, but it gave him a sense of familiarity. So he ended up picking EE. It was a decent option—he could even aim for state grid recruitment or some stable civil service job. Still, realistically, he might not do any of that, because ultimately, he’d be expected to take over his dad’s business someday.

College life went pretty much as he’d imagined—pleasant and comfortable. He took on a few part-time jobs, not because he needed the money but because he liked staying busy. It made him feel accomplished.

Meanwhile, once he entered university, he found himself interacting more with Xie Siheng. Their departments were far apart, yet whenever there was a break, Xie Siheng would appear under his dorm building to invite him for a meal. Chi Wang had never seen him so “enthusiastic” before. As kids, Xie Siheng occasionally invited him along, but it always included Zuo Qianxing. Chi Wang felt like the third wheel. If he weren’t there, Zuo Qianxing’s “warm face” would just be stuck on Xie Siheng’s “cold backside.”

Chi Wang knew he served a function in that dynamic but didn’t really mind. He’d even become friends with Zuo Qianxing through it. And ironically, he and Xie Siheng were now closer than ever.

Yet Xie Siheng still struggled with insomnia, popping sleeping pills regularly. Neither Western nor Chinese medicine seemed to help. Because of that, he seemed perpetually tense under his cool exterior. Even around Chi Wang, he sometimes betrayed hints of restlessness, like he was on the verge of losing his temper. Yet for some reason, he never actually got angry at Chi Wang—his tone remained restrained, with a touch of something indefinable.

By that point, Chi Wang began sensing that maybe something was off, although he tried not to dwell on it—partly out of caution. It can’t be that kind of coincidence, he told himself. He’d been hit on by boys since middle school, so he wasn’t oblivious to how these things worked. But he avoided jumping to conclusions.

Destiny, however, can take a sudden turn.

Yes, in the second semester of his sophomore year, he and Xie Siheng started dating.

Chi Wang was still baffled when he looked back on it. Because it was Xie Siheng who confessed.

Even now, Chi Wang found it surreal.

It happened on Mid-Autumn Festival. The holiday break was too short, and they lived too far from home. Though a plane ride might only take two hours, Chi Wang’s luck was bad enough that he feared flying. And a train would take more than four hours. With only a one-day break, going back home seemed pointless. So they simply spent the holiday together near H University, at Xie Siheng’s small off-campus house.

After dinner, the two of them were outside in his yard, looking at the moon. That night, the moon was huge and extremely bright. The cool moonlight seemed like silver gauze shimmering over the earth, and oddly, there was a faint circle of a halo around it.

Chi Wang was busy snapping pictures with his camera, capturing the scene, then reviewing the shots. Suddenly, Xie Siheng’s voice spoke in that chilly tone of his: “From now on, let’s spend every Mid-Autumn Festival together.”

Chi Wang, still absorbed in his camera, replied, “That’s not so easy—we both have families. Don’t people normally go home on Mid-Autumn to be with their parents?”

Cool as the moonlight, Xie Siheng said, “Once a person starts their own family, they end up separate from their parents.”

Chi Wang froze and raised his head to look over. In the dark, Xie Siheng’s inky-black eyes fixed on him, revealing a startling intensity. Chi Wang was so taken aback by that look that he dropped his gaze again.

Xie Siheng asked, “Have you ever thought about ‘starting a family’ yourself?”

Chi Wang fiddled with his camera lens, voice quiet. “Not really. I’m still young. Why bother thinking about that?”

“I have,” Xie Siheng said.

Chi Wang: “…?”

He hastened to make an excuse. “Uh, my stomach hurts—gonna go…”

Before he could finish, Xie Siheng’s words came tumbling out: “I want to start a family…with you.”

Chi Wang: “…”

Dude, you’re really just putting that out there?

He stood there, toes curling inside his shoes. Honestly…he had already suspected something. Xie Siheng treated him too nicely, to a degree that wasn’t normal for mere childhood friends.

But once a doubt like that formed, it was impossible to ignore. And seeing that Xie Siheng had taken this step, Chi Wang had no choice but to face the shift in their relationship.

He had plenty of worries—if things ended badly, he’d lose an old friend. Yet Xie Siheng evidently had no such qualms. Once he laid it on the table, he was determined to see it through.

Chi Wang didn’t agree right away—he told him he needed time. So he deliberated for half a semester, and in the second half of his sophomore year, they officially started dating.

There was nothing particularly dramatic about it. Xie Siheng was reserved and traditional; the most they did was hold hands. Even though they were young and hormonal, they didn’t cross the line. Chi Wang was relieved, as he was pretty conservative too.

By the time Xie Siheng was graduating in his senior year, Chi Wang tentatively suggested they take things further. The first attempt happened at Xie Siheng’s house.

He still had insomnia, and Chi Wang worried he might literally pass out mid-act. So he carefully chose a day when Xie Siheng had gotten five hours’ sleep in the daytime, making sure his nighttime stamina was relatively safe. Otherwise, Chi Wang feared seeing headlines like, “Two male college students try it for the first time, get overly excited, and tragedy ensues. Is it a moral collapse or human depravity?”

He shuddered at the thought, so there they were. Chi Wang initially wanted to negotiate who would top or bottom—frankly, “Little Xie’s” proportions looked too big to handle. But faced with Xie Siheng’s aura, he didn’t dare bring it up. Clearly, Xie Siheng wasn’t one to let someone else “have his butt,” so why shoot himself in the foot? Besides, Chi Wang wasn’t eager to mess with that butt either.

So be it. He told himself the receiving side was supposedly more pleasurable, according to online chatter. Half-believing, half-skeptical.

That evening, Chi Wang downed a small amount of red wine for courage. One sip was all it took to keep him in a half-tipsy, half-sober state.

They sat on the bed, Xie Siheng’s broad palm encircling Chi Wang’s lean waist. Leaning in, he kissed Chi Wang. The mellow taste of red wine lingered in Chi Wang’s mouth, stirring Xie Siheng to clutch him more tightly.

They fell back on the bed. His kisses started gentle, became urgent, then mellowed again, tongues tangling. Soon Xie Siheng pressed Chi Wang down and…stopped moving.

Chi Wang: “??”

He gave him a slight push, reaching to flick on the light. Under the glow, he saw that Xie Siheng had fallen asleep.

Chi Wang: “…seriously?”

He was equal parts exasperated and amused. Such a perfect mood, and Xie Siheng fell asleep?!

But after a moment, Chi Wang calmed down—Xie Siheng’s insomnia was severe, and he rarely slept at night. If he could drift off now, that was a good thing. He tucked Xie Siheng under the blanket, then looked down at his sleeping face. Something stirred in his chest. Slipping under the covers too, he hugged Xie Siheng, gave his cheek a soft kiss, and closed his eyes, joining him in slumber.

*

Not long after, they realized something odd was going on. The “first time” had fizzled out because Xie Siheng fell asleep mid-kiss. The second time it happened…he again conked out while kissing. Repeatedly, it was the same. That was when they concluded that apparently, Xie Siheng’s insomnia magically vanished whenever he tried to take it further with Chi Wang—as if Chi Wang were a human sleeping pill. Provided they were in bed together, Xie Siheng would knock right out.

By age nineteen, Chi Wang joked that he was basically “Ambien in human form.” No wonder he slept so well and never once woke up in the night—turns out he was a sleeping pill.

It was comical, but it explained a lot. They were both so conservative that despite being in a relationship, they’d never actually gotten to that point. No wonder they only discovered it now.

Hence, they took their time with going further, focusing instead on sleeping side by side so Xie Siheng’s schedule could adjust. Finally, once his sleeping pattern improved, they attempted it again.

That time, Xie Siheng didn’t fall asleep halfway, and the penetration was successful.

At first he stayed still, letting Chi Wang acclimate. Chi Wang inhaled sharply. “It’s… so tight,” he said.

Rubbing his back soothingly, Xie Siheng helped him relax. Chi Wang’s face was fiery—this was the first time for both of them, and their inexperience showed. They’d left the light on so they could see. Xie Siheng caught sight of Chi Wang’s pale spine arching beautifully, his eyes filled with gentle affection. Lowering his head, he kissed the nape and back of Chi Wang in a trail of soft pecks. Gradually, Chi Wang relaxed but was still uncomfortable. He twisted a little. “Brother, I wanna see your face.”

So they shifted to face each other. Once he was actually looking at Xie Siheng, Chi Wang grew even more embarrassed, turning bright red. He pressed his forearm across his face, lips so flushed they looked like they might bleed. “Turn off the light—please turn it off!”

Though a bit regretful, Xie Siheng reached to flick it off, and they finished the deed in darkness.

Afterward, Xie Siheng said in a husky voice, “The condom broke.”

Chi Wang felt the sticky dampness and complained, “That’s what happens when you go so hard. Aren’t you already huge enough? No need to pound so violently. D’you think I’m a piece of mochi?”

Xie Siheng: “…”

Chi Wang shrugged it off. “No big deal if it leaked. It’s not like I can get pregnant.”

He never imagined he’d end up eating those words someday—but that’s another story for later.

*

That year, during Chinese New Year, Chi Wang watched Xiao Fu set up fireworks out on the lawn while their parents looked on. Standing under his parents’ watchful gaze, Chi Wang secretly texted Xie Siheng, a sweet smile curving his lips. He felt like the happiest person in the world.

(THE END)