Chapter 1
In the blazing summer heat, at the exit of T City’s subway station, a middle-aged man carrying luggage and a young girl moved through the crowded crowd unnoticed, just as they had when they stepped off the train.
“Dad, this is way too heavy!”
“Is it? Then I’ll carry it.”
“That’s not what I meant! Why aren’t we taking a car? Wouldn’t it be easier to put the luggage in one?”
“It’s not much. I can carry it. It’s not far—I’ve walked this route a few times on business trips. The bus won’t stop right at our apartment anyway; we’d still have to walk.”
“What about a taxi?”
“It’s really not far. No need to waste the starting fare. Besides, in this heat, the taxis here won’t even turn on the air conditioner. It’s stuffy inside. Walking is cooler.”
The girl was nearly exasperated. “Dad!”
The father hurried to comfort her. “Don’t worry. Forget this little bit of luggage—even if it were twice as much, I could handle it. Don’t carry anything, give it all to me. Just think of it as taking a walk with me, okay?”
He tied the handles of two large plastic bags together and slung them across his shoulders like a carrying pole, while still holding a bag in each hand. The sight was rather comical.
Pouting, the girl snatched one gray duffel bag printed with “XX Company 10th Anniversary” from his hand. “Forget it. You always try to tough it out.” Seeing her walk ahead, her long ponytail swishing energetically, the man felt comforted. His daughter looked thin and small, yet she was surprisingly strong.
At last, their destination—the apartment—came into view. The man wiped his sweat and smiled.
“See? We’re here.”
“What do you mean ‘see’? We’ve been walking forever,” the girl muttered.
He chuckled. “A taxi costs twelve yuan just to start. We’ve saved that. How about we use it to buy you a cake?”
The girl was still young; hearing this, she immediately cheered. “Okay!” After climbing up to the fifth floor drenched in sweat, both sighed in relief when he unlocked the door.
This apartment was a dormitory arranged by the T City headquarters, reserved for employees from branch offices who came for business trips or training. The building was old and the décor simple, but the location was good, transportation convenient, and the orientation decent. Most importantly, there was no rent.
“Little Ke, boil some water first. Here, I brought the kettle. The outlet’s over there—see it? Then wash a cup, drink some water, and rest. Don’t worry about the luggage; I’ll sort it out.”
“Okay.”
Qu Ke ran to the kitchen, filled the kettle, and plugged it in. It began to hum softly.
Qu Tongqiu had become a divorced man early in life and had only this one daughter. Qu Ke was remarkably capable—at fourteen, she had already been admitted to T University with the top score in the city.
As a father, he felt both proud and worried. Though his daughter seemed sensible and more mature than her peers, she was still only fourteen. Sending her alone to a university in a distant city was bound to cause concern. If she hadn’t always dreamed of T University, he would have preferred she study closer to home.
After the divorce, Qu Tongqiu’s life revolved entirely around his daughter. She was the sun; he was the earth. Since she would be in T City for several years, perhaps longer, he naturally wanted to come too. It just so happened the company offered management staff a chance to train at the headquarters—supposedly to broaden horizons and inspire innovation. He did everything he could to secure the opportunity.
After a quick cleaning, father and daughter sat down to eat the dry food and water they had brought, then continued unpacking. The girl didn’t complain of fatigue; once full, she picked up a rag and wiped the apartment from top to bottom.
“Let’s fill our stomachs first. Tonight we’ll have a proper meal,” Qu Tongqiu said, patting her head. “My good girl, sorry for the hardship.” By the time the one-bedroom apartment was mostly tidy, the sun was still up, but the oppressive heat outside had eased.
He planned to buy a small bed that evening. He had already brought fabric, clips, and wire; by hanging a thick curtain in the bedroom, he could create a sleeping space for Qu Ke. T University wouldn’t start for a few days, so they would spend this time—and future weekends—together.
“Little Ke, go take a shower and rest. Later we’ll go out for a good meal, and we need to visit Uncle Ren.” Qu Ke cheered and took a new dress into the bathroom.
After sitting quietly for a while, Qu Tongqiu picked up the living room phone. As he dialed, a smile crept onto his face, mixed with a hint of nervousness.
All his relatives were back home, and he had few friends elsewhere—but in T City, he had one best friend.
Of course, “best friend” was from his perspective; the other party might not see it the same way.
Still, Ren Ningyuan had truly treated him well and helped him many times.
He didn’t even need to mention their student days. Even his later girlfriend had been introduced by Ren Ningyuan. When he got married, having just dropped out of university, both families disapproved and money was tight. Ren Ningyuan had booked the hotel, arranged the entire wedding banquet, lent him all the expenses, and even gave a generous gift to ease his urgent needs. Qu Tongqiu had been deeply grateful.
Yet their usual interactions were lukewarm. He wasn’t part of Ren Ningyuan’s social circle. They rarely communicated; Qu Tongqiu often sent emails, holiday cards, and local specialties, but Ren Ningyuan usually didn’t reply—at most, a brief “Received.”
Only when Qu Tongqiu ran into trouble would Ren Ningyuan appear, solve everything swiftly and cleanly, then disappear again, returning their relationship to calm waters.
A gentleman’s friendship.
After several rings, the call finally connected. Ren Ningyuan was always slow to answer unfamiliar numbers.
“Hello? Who is this?”
“It’s me.”
The man made an “oh” sound. “Why aren’t you using your mobile?”
“I haven’t bought a local SIM yet. Using my phone would be long-distance plus roaming…”
As always, Ren Ningyuan had little patience for his penny-pinching and cut him off. “You’re not in C City? Where are you?”
“I’m in T City. Didn’t the number show that?”
After a few seconds, the other man asked, “Why did you come?”
Qu Tongqiu had visited T City many times before, but always in a rush—arrive, work, leave—his world limited to the dormitory, the company, and client offices. He worked like a dog and rose earlier than a rooster, never stopping. Besides, Ren Ningyuan always seemed busy. He didn’t even know which company Ren Ningyuan worked for or what his current situation was, so there had never been a reason to call in advance.
Now he would stay for two years, maybe longer. Thinking of seeing Ren Ningyuan again after so many years and living in the same city as a friend he’d only spoken to by phone, he felt a spark of novelty and excitement.
“I wanted to surprise you.”
The man on the other end was surprised—but not pleased. “Business trip?”
Qu Tongqiu was so used to deferring to him that he immediately felt guilty. “No, training. Two years.”
There was a hint of reproach in Ren Ningyuan’s voice. “Why didn’t you mention it beforehand?”
Smiling nervously, Qu Tongqiu hurried to explain. “Actually, my daughter got into T University, so she’s here to study. I transferred to the headquarters at the same time. It didn’t seem like a big deal—I thought I’d invite you to dinner after arriving and tell you then.”
Silence followed. He could almost picture Ren Ningyuan frowning deeply on the other end of the line.
“Bring Little Ke out tonight and let’s have dinner together. I should welcome you properly,” Ren Ningyuan said. Qu Tongqiu hurriedly agreed again and again.
Ren Ningyuan was naturally steady and reserved; he said nothing outright, but it was obvious he was not particularly pleased. The gap between this and what Qu Tongqiu had imagined made him uneasy.
That evening, Qu Tongqiu had originally planned to treat them to a mid-range restaurant he had visited with clients before, but in the end they still went to a restaurant booked by Ren Ningyuan.
Although Qu Tongqiu valued this friend greatly, he also felt a kind of fear—or rather reverence—toward him. This feeling had accumulated over time; whatever Ren Ningyuan said, he would answer “yes,” “okay,” or “right,” while smiling constantly, instinctively lowering himself a couple of levels and not even daring to fight over ordering or paying.
Qu Ke, however, interacted with Ren Ningyuan far more naturally. She was lively, intelligent, and sweet-looking, always well liked by elders, and she managed to make Ren Ningyuan smile repeatedly.
When the meal was nearly over, Ren Ningyuan said to Qu Ke, “By the way, I have a gift for you. Nothing special, just something you’ll use at school. Study hard and don’t make your dad worry.” Usually, when a child was admitted to a good university, relatives and acquaintances would give practical gifts—an envelope with a bit of money for stationery, a few books, or study supplies. Female coworkers had even given Qu Ke a dress to celebrate her leaving her school uniform behind and becoming a young lady.
Naturally, Qu Tongqiu thanked him profusely and accepted the gift. It was a carefully wrapped large box, somewhat heavy but not excessively so.
The weight made him wonder if it might be some kind of dense pastry. After all, Ren Ningyuan would never give something awkward or bizarre.
Back home, when they opened the box, Qu Tongqiu was startled, while Qu Ke cried out happily, “Ah, the white one…” Qu Tongqiu was at a loss. Receiving an Apple laptop as a school gift was far too extravagant.
“Dad…” Sensing his thoughts, Qu Ke immediately pounced on the laptop and hugged it tightly, afraid he would return it.
Qu Tongqiu was torn. One should not accept rewards without merit. But seeing his daughter’s eager eyes, few fathers could pour cold water on that.
“Dad, I’ll definitely need this for drawing in the future.” He sighed. Qu Ke had always been sensible, never pestering for things like other children. Even for snacks, she would do chores to earn pocket money. She truly should have a better computer for university.
And someone like Ren Ningyuan would not appreciate his gift being rejected. Once given, it was meant to be accepted; polite refusals would only earn a cold look of disdain.
After thinking it over, Qu Tongqiu patted her head. “You can keep the computer, but remember Uncle Ren’s kindness. When you succeed, you must repay him, understand?”
“Of course!” Qu Ke hugged the white machine happily. “But that’ll take years—how about you repay him first, Dad?”
Qu Tongqiu felt emotional. He had planned to buy her a laptop as a reward for getting into a top university, but during the divorce he had given all his savings to his wife and started over empty-handed. Over the years, his income went to supporting both of them, especially his daughter, leaving little to save.
After setting aside tuition and a semester’s living expenses, he simply couldn’t afford a good laptop. Buying a mediocre one seemed pointless; better to save longer.
Yet Ren Ningyuan had bought exactly what he needed most. Now they wouldn’t have to move his own bulky computer to the university dorm.
Ren Ningyuan treated him coldly, with little warmth or affection, yet always appeared at the moment he most needed help, lifting a heavy burden from his shoulders.
Qu Tongqiu didn’t know how to define this friendship. He feared Ren Ningyuan because he was a very difficult person to please.
Back when Ren Ningyuan organized his wedding, Qu Tongqiu had been deeply grateful and spent months fawning over him, almost worshipping him as a savior. But Ren Ningyuan hated such flattery and ignored him for a long time afterward.
Qu Tongqiu knew Ren Ningyuan found him somewhat annoying and couldn’t stand his ingratiating attitude. Before he became something like Ren Ningyuan’s follower for protection, he had even been beaten by Ren Ningyuan’s group more than once.
Yet he never understood what had made Ren Ningyuan stop driving him away, become his protector, and tolerate maintaining contact.
It was late. Qu Tongqiu assembled the small bed he had bought, hung the curtain and mosquito net, and after saying goodnight, father and daughter went to sleep separated by the curtain.
The night was still stuffy. A standing fan oscillated against the wall, blowing back and forth. Hearing his daughter turning restlessly, he asked softly, “What’s wrong? Too hot?”
After a pause, she said in a small, aggrieved voice, “I want to go home.” Qu Tongqiu chuckled. This was her first time away from home. Even with her father beside her, T City was different from C City, and this temporary apartment didn’t smell like home. Homesickness was inevitable.
Teasing her, he said, “I told you to choose a university closer to home, but you wouldn’t.”
“But I wanted a good university.” The one near home barely counted as third-rate.
He comforted her gently. “To succeed in your studies, you have to endure hardship. Endure the hardest hardships to become the best. Besides, this is a small matter. Don’t worry—Dad is here, so this is home too.”
“But I’m not used to it. I don’t know anyone here, and I don’t even like the water.”
“You’ll get used to it. When I went away for university, I felt the same at first, but soon adapted. People are very resilient. After a while, you’ll find your new life interesting.”
“Really?”
“Really.”
After coaxing her to sleep, Qu Tongqiu found himself unable to fall asleep.
His first day leaving home for university had been sixteen or seventeen years ago. Yet in the quiet of the night, with insects chirping outside, the memories felt vivid again.
He had attended S University, a prestigious school ranked highly nationwide in science and engineering. When he was admitted, his family had celebrated with a banquet for relatives and neighbors.
But when he arrived from the closed-off C City to the bustling metropolis of S University, he discovered the school had a fierce culture—fights were commonplace.
Students managed themselves, forming a long-standing system that kept a fragile balance. As long as nothing major happened, the school neither wanted nor could interfere.
When Qu Tongqiu first arrived, he looked far worse than he did now. He had developed late—short, chubby, wearing glasses, with drooping eyelids that made his eyes seem half closed.
He looked weak and awkward; how could he not be bullied?
Still, people like him didn’t have the worst fate. As long as they were obedient, they were merely extorted for money and treated like errand boys by seniors. Eventually, once they became seniors themselves or found powerful allies, life improved.
The first physical violence he experienced came from a classmate who had copied his English test answers.
When the papers were returned, full of red crosses and a failing grade, the classmate grabbed his ear and yanked it upward. “Damn it, aren’t you supposed to be good at studying?” Qu Tongqiu yelped in pain, his neck twisted and mouth crooked in a comical expression.
Someone nearby tried to mediate. “Why did you copy his answers?”
“Isn’t a fat loser like him supposed to have good grades?” the classmate cursed, and others snickered.
It was an unspoken rule everywhere: if someone wasn’t good-looking, sociable, or lively, then they must at least have good grades.
“A-Jie, stop complaining. You chose the wrong person to copy.”
A-Jie was still furious. “Damn it—ugly, gloomy, and bad at studying. What’s the point of living? Might as well die.”
Being bullied was almost a rite of passage for many college boys, like an early training camp for the real world.
Qu Tongqiu, in both appearance and personality, was like a nameless supporting character in a youth inspirational film. Timid and submissive, he would bow immediately before authority. If seniors demanded protection money, he was always the first to pay.
Being sensible certainly spared him a lot of suffering, but no one respected such a spineless person.
No one wanted to be a coward, yet he simply didn’t have what it took to be a hero. When A-Jie shoved and hit him, he felt indignant, but in a real fight he would definitely lose—he’d be slapped senseless before he even had time to strike back.
Besides, A-Jie and his arrogant group weren’t bold for no reason. They all knew people in the student union or had their own cliques. Offending one meant offending a whole group, and the consequences would be severe.
At the time, the boys’ dormitory housed eight people per room. The student whose bed lay diagonally across from his was extremely handsome, with red lips and white teeth, a famous freshman heartthrob named Zhuang Wei. He was a local student from a prestigious high school, came from a good family, proud and aloof, with a bit of a bookish air—the kind of protagonist you’d see in a youth movie.
At S University, freshmen were expected to hold a welcome gathering, but instead of seniors welcoming them, the new students had to pool money to “pay respects” to their seniors.
Most paid reluctantly, though a few with tough personalities and strong fists refused. Zhuang Wei was one of them.
The saying goes that the tallest tree catches the wind. The seniors made an example of him, and before long he was targeted. Even someone like Qu Tongqiu, who quickly paid to avoid trouble, would inevitably be harassed sooner or later—but the way they treated cowards and the way they treated the defiant were very different.
Zhuang Wei was first subjected to petty harassment. With his stubborn and somewhat rigid personality, he refused to bow his head and had a sharp tongue. Soon he was isolated, and then the beatings began.
The more he resisted, the worse the treatment became, until the injuries even showed on his face.
He had never been particularly popular, and once he became a target, he was like a ticking bomb. No one dared get close to him, lest they be dragged into trouble when he was beaten.
In this way, Qu Tongqiu and Zhuang Wei shared the same lonely fate.
Because Qu Tongqiu was too obedient and spineless, he became the “favorite” errand boy of the student gangs—whether as a punching bag or a runner, he was always included. Naturally, he had no friends either.
By all logic, the two unfortunate souls should have sympathized with each other. But Zhuang Wei despised him, and Qu Tongqiu found Zhuang Wei’s arrogance irritating.
Their first real interaction happened when Qu Tongqiu was sent to buy beer for two sophomores. After he returned, the two discussed who should repay him.
Knowing their habits, he quickly smiled and said, “No need, no need. It’s only right for a junior to treat his seniors.”
“That won’t do. Brother Ren doesn’t allow us to make juniors buy things without paying anymore. He’s been strict about it lately.”
Qu Tongqiu didn’t know whether to leave or stay. Just then he saw someone approaching from afar.
The two seniors immediately brightened. “There’s the beer money! Go tell that guy to lend us some cash. Bring back whatever he has.”
Reluctant but afraid of their fists, Qu Tongqiu slowly approached—and realized the unlucky person was Zhuang Wei.
Forcing himself to speak, he said, “Hey.”
Zhuang Wei frowned. “What?”
“Do you have money on you?”
“Yes.”
“How much?”
“One hundred.”
“Give me fifty.”
Zhuang Wei stepped back warily. “Why?”
“They sent me to collect protection money. If you don’t give any, they’ll search you and beat you. Give them fifty and at least you’ll keep the other half.”
Zhuang Wei looked at him coldly. “So you’ve been promoted to their lackey.”
Angry but unwilling to watch his roommate get beaten, Qu Tongqiu urged him, “Don’t be stubborn. Do you want them to take everything?”
“I’d rather be robbed than help bullies.”
Qu Tongqiu cursed inwardly. Helping bullies was his role, not Zhuang Wei’s.
Seeing the seniors growing impatient, he pleaded, “Just lend me fifty. I’ll pay them and let you go. I’ll repay you later, every cent.”
“You can be their lackey yourself. I won’t cooperate.”
The seniors exploded. “Are you stupid? Why is this taking so long?”
Qu Tongqiu hurriedly placated them, but Zhuang Wei suddenly shouted, “I refuse to pay! Why should I give money to trash like you?”
It was like poking a hornet’s nest. Though only two hornets attacked, it was enough. Qu Tongqiu tried to intervene, but after taking two punches, he fell silent and watched helplessly.
Calling for help would only get everyone punished for fighting. The smartest move was to slip away, but he hesitated.
Just then, a voice asked, “What are you doing?”
The two seniors froze and immediately stood straight, smiling nervously. “Brother Ren, Senior Chu.”
“You bullying the weak again?” Chu Mo joked.
“It’s just disciplining an unruly junior…”
Chu Mo glanced at Zhuang Wei on the ground and Qu Tongqiu standing nearby. “I was wrong. You’re bullying the ‘weak,’ but not exactly small.”
Chu Mo was tall, bronze-skinned, handsome, with dyed hair. Beside him stood another boy of similar build, black hair and eyes, with a sharp, elegant nose—like a noble young gentleman.
Compared to them, Qu Tongqiu felt like the villain.
The black-haired boy frowned. “What happened?”
Hearing them call him Brother Ren, Qu Tongqiu realized this might be his chance and quickly explained everything.
“I told you not to extort or make juniors buy things without paying. Did you forget?” Ren Ningyuan said coldly.
Chu Mo tried to smooth things over, but Ren Ningyuan replied, “You know I’m not patient.”
Everyone fell silent.
Chu Mo then scolded the sophomores. “Go back and wait. You know the consequences.”
He looked at Zhuang Wei and laughed. “Ah, it’s you. The most troublesome freshman besides him. Pity you don’t have his ability.”
They left after telling Qu Tongqiu to take Zhuang Wei back.
As Ren Ningyuan’s gaze fell on him, Qu Tongqiu felt instantly ashamed and pushed up his glasses. He never expected Ren Ningyuan to speak so politely to him. Before he finished bowing in thanks, the two had already walked away.
Translator’s Note:
I am back again with a nostalgic translation. This novel is one of the OG BL novels I’ve read. I even bought the novel’s hardcover when it was first released.
Just a quick warning, this novel is not for the weak-hearted, because it will leave you weeping through the night. However, if you enjoy beautifully written BL literature, then please hop on the train.
Hope you enjoy this novel as I did, and happy reading~
