Chapter 31 – I’m Thinking About How to Eat You
“What can I possibly do? I was sent over there completely by accident,” Xia Yi said helplessly, urging the system, “179, report all of this to the main system and tell them to hurry up and fix the bug.”
“Got it, I’ve already reported it,” 179 replied, equally exasperated.
After the meal, Xia Yi led Meng Wanzi and Qi Zhou to the old house and carefully explained, “This is where Xiao Ming—ah, Tian… Tian…”
“Tian Quan,” Meng Wanzi prompted.
“Right, this is where Tian Quan lived. It’s not much, but you’ll have to make do here,” Xia Yi said.
There wasn’t any other place for them, anyway.
“How could we find it lacking? We Qishan disciples are indebted to you for your repeated assistance, and I, Meng, am deeply grateful,” Meng Wanzi said hurriedly.
Qi Zhou stood in the courtyard, his gaze sweeping over the fallen leaves and the climbing vines on the walls. He took a few steps, worried that the dust in the corners might dirty his pristine shoes.
“There’s a well over there. You can fetch water and clean the place yourself,” Xia Yi told him, noticing Qi Zhou’s discomfort. “But you’ll have to do it yourself—there are no servants here.”
Seeing Qi Zhou’s sad gaze land on him, Xia Yi quickly added, “I was just accidentally transmitted to your Qishan, I’m not really one of your sect members.”
Qi Zhou pouted and nodded, then looked at Xia Yi’s forehead. “You have a red mole too? I noticed I’ve also gotten one on my forehead and suspected I might’ve been poisoned by some kind of miasma.”
Xia Yi paused briefly, thought for a moment, and replied, “Don’t worry, you’re perfectly healthy, nothing’s wrong.”
“Does this red mole mean something? Like a mark for cultivators?” Qi Zhou asked again.
“Maybe it signifies that you’re exceptionally gifted,” Xia Yi glanced at Qi Zhou, which was somewhat true.
Thinking that Qi Zhou wouldn’t be here for long and that he’d soon return to his original world, Xia Yi decided not to explain further, not wanting to add any psychological burden.
Qi Zhou nodded in half-understanding, and as long as it wasn’t life-threatening, he quickly pushed the matter aside.
After settling the master and disciple, Xia Yi finally excused himself.
That night, Gu Wenzhu was sitting at the bedside, sewing winter clothes. He took out a roll of fabric he had bought in town a few days ago, measuring and cutting according to Xia Yi’s size with quick, precise snips.
Xia Yi lay there with his chin resting on the blanket, unconsciously staring at Gu Wenzhu’s profile in a daze.
The candlelight cast a soft glow on Gu Wenzhu, softening his sharp features. His thin lips pressed together, forming a delicate curve. His sword-like eyebrows slanted into his temples, and his slightly trembling lashes added a gentle touch. Xia Yi’s fingers twitched, barely resisting the urge to reach out and touch him.
“179, I really want to do something bad right now. We’ve been dating for so long and are already engaged. He’s practically mine, and the timing feels just right,” Xia Yi’s inner thoughts began to stir.
“I’ve been single all my life in the original world, and I’ve had enough of it,” Xia Yi buried his face in the pillow, rolling around in bed, causing Gu Wenzhu to glance at him a few times, unable to help but smile.
“What are you planning?” 179 asked warily. “You’re not even focused on completing your mission anymore. Are you going to let yourself be completely ruined by this little seducer?”
“Doing the mission has nothing to do with me staying single, does it? What, does your mission require virginity or something?” Xia Yi retorted indignantly, “You’re just a jealous system.”
Gu Wenzhu watched as Xia Yi hugged his pillow, rolling around until his hair was a messy tangle, with a few strands sticking up. Then, as if deep in thought, he started to giggle foolishly, covering his face with the pillow while kicking his legs. Other times, he looked frustrated and upset.
His round almond-shaped eyes alternated between shy and joyful, his expressions ever-changing.
Unable to suppress a chuckle, Gu Wenzhu put down his needle and thread and gently smoothed Xia Yi’s hair. “What are you thinking about?”
His deep, magnetic voice was like a cello resonating in the air.
Thinking about what? How to devour you.
“179, if the number of petals on this flower is odd, I’ll focus on my mission seriously, even on my wedding day. But if it’s even, tonight, I’ll… hehe…” Xia Yi reached for a golden zinnia from the vase on the bedside table.
He had picked a bunch of them earlier that morning when he passed by a blooming patch near the fields.
“Odd, even, odd, even…” 179 anxiously counted the petals as Xia Yi plucked them one by one, heart pounding.
“Hah!” 179 gasped in delight.
There was just one lonely petal left on the stem, trembling and about to fall.
“It’s odd! Haha, it’s odd! Host, go to sleep, get a good night’s rest and work on the mission tomorrow,” the system rejoiced.
“Even,” Xia Yi said flatly as he plucked the last petal. “I’m going to make my move now. You’d better block yourself, and if you dare spy on me, I’ll report you.”
“You… you’re cheating!” 179 shouted, both shocked and indignant.
“And so what if I am?” Xia Yi raised his head, expression icy. “Hasn’t your system cheated me enough?”
179 was rendered speechless, choking on the words. After a long pause, it finally muttered angrily, “I’m going to watch a movie. If you disturb me, I’ll blast music in your head.” Then it fell silent.
“179, 179,” Xia Yi called out a few more times, wary that the system might suddenly pop back up, just like the time he kissed Gu Wenzhu.
“179, I feel like I’m about to teleport again.”
“179, Aunt Li is here.”
After several attempts to test the system, Xia Yi was finally satisfied that it had indeed shut down. Relaxing, he began his preparations.
First, he coaxed the qilin, which had been biting on its toy nearby, back to its bed. He couldn’t let it stand by the bed and witness everything.
The qilin, playing happily, was suddenly shooed away, and it looked up at Xia Yi with large, round eyes full of grievance.
“Good boy, once your daddy’s done with some important business, I’ll make you a big bone broth tomorrow,” Xia Yi whispered, dragging it to its bed.
Luckily, the qilin was obedient and didn’t resist, even though it was reluctant.
Next, he shut the door, drew the curtains tight, and finally, he sat beside Gu Wenzhu, quietly unbuttoning one of the fasteners at the top of his robe.
He looked down. Not enough.
He undid two more buttons, revealing the hollow of his collarbone and a glimpse of smooth, white skin.
Then, he scooted over to lean against Gu Wenzhu’s shoulder.
“What’s the matter? Feeling cold?” Gu Wenzhu, noticing Xia Yi inching closer, asked softly, his voice like silk brushing past the ear.
“Not cold, just a bit warm,” Xia Yi replied in a low voice, his hot breath fanning against Gu Wenzhu’s neck.
As he spoke, he pressed even closer, wrapping his arms around Gu Wenzhu’s waist.
“Hey, brother Zhu, I just noticed you have a birthmark behind your ear,” Xia Yi said suddenly, intrigued, reaching out to gently touch it.
The birthmark was a pale blue teardrop shape, right behind Gu Wenzhu’s ear. It was so subtle that it could easily be missed unless viewed from the right angle.
Gu Wenzhu’s body shivered slightly from Xia Yi’s warm fingers, and the hand holding the needle paused in midair.
He slowly turned his head, looking directly at Xia Yi.
Looking over, he momentarily held his breath. His seemingly calm eyes hid a brewing storm, deep and obscure, his expression growing increasingly complicated and difficult to read.
“What’s wrong? Keep sewing,” Xia Yi pretended not to notice, looking innocently at the fabric in Guo Wenzhu’s hands. He even reached out a finger to poke at it, then slowly traced the contours up until his finger slid onto Guo Wenzhu’s clenched fist.
The soft pad of his finger lightly rubbed the tight, balled-up hand.
Guo Wenzhu swallowed with difficulty, his Adam’s apple moving up and down.
The room was silent except for the occasional crackle from the candle and the sound of Guo Wenzhu’s increasingly heavy breathing. Xia Yi appeared calm, his eyes like a placid autumn lake, filled with innocence and naivety, though inside he was a storm of emotions.
“Ahhh, what do I do next? Should I just pounce on him?”
“Can he stop staring at me like this? I’m about to lose it.”
“If he doesn’t make a move soon, I’ll have to.”
Guo Wenzhu finally spoke, his voice hoarse as he said, “Xiao Yi, button your shirt.”
“I won’t. I’m hot…” Xia Yi murmured softly and pressed his hand to Guo Wenzhu’s burning cheek.
Guo Wenzhu clenched his eyes shut, turning his head away, the veins on his forehead bulging. His fingers tightened until his knuckles turned white as he forced out the words through gritted teeth, “Xiao Yi, we’re not married yet, we can’t do this.”
You’re literally sewing your wedding clothes, the furniture’s ready, the date’s set, and you’ve even gathered the villagers to help with the wedding. And you’re telling me we’re not married yet?
Looks like I’ll have to take charge.
Might as well go all in.
If the mountain won’t come to me, I’ll level the mountain and turn it into a field.
With determination in his heart, Xia Yi decided to stop hesitating. “Poof!” He blew out the candle on the table and pounced on Guo Wenzhu…
In the dark, there was the sound of clothes being pulled and the crash of a small table being knocked over…
“Clink!” A spark lit up, briefly illuminating the room.
Guo Wenzhu, his clothes in disarray and hair tousled, stretched out to relight the candle, his voice shaky as he said repeatedly, “Xiao Yi, calm down, I can’t do this to you…”
“Poof!” The newly lit candle was blown out again, and Xia Yi’s frustrated voice came through, “Where do you think you’re running?”
“Xiao Yi, Xiao Yi, stop…”
“Shut up.”
In the dead of night, the village was silent except for the chirping of autumn insects and a few dogs barking.
“Clink!” The sound of a flint striking was heard again, and light once more appeared from a small house. At the same time, Xia Yi’s trembling voice could be heard, “Wenzhu, no more, no more.”
“Poof!” The light went out again, followed by Guo Wenzhu’s hoarse voice, “Just one more time, darling.”
The qilin (mythical beast) was having a rough night, unable to sleep due to the noise. Strange sounds kept coming from the house, and the light kept going on and off. It was truly annoying for the poor dog.
finally eaten hahahahha