Su Xingchuan rested at home for two days.
The pain from the incision hadn’t subsided when his boss, Yan Tao, dragged him out to meet Xu Zhengdong at Zhongjin Group.
Xu Zhengdong was as arrogant as ever, maintaining an aloof attitude and avoiding any real discussion about the collaboration. Instead, he diverted the conversation to irrelevant topics. Yan Tao spoke with him for a long time and then invited him to a dinner at a Western restaurant near Zhongjin’s headquarters that evening.
Xu Zhengdong glanced at Su Xingchuan and suddenly asked, “Why isn’t Xiao Su saying anything?”
Su Xingchuan smiled. “I was just thinking about what you said earlier.”
Xu Zhengdong sized him up but still didn’t commit to any plan.
Yan Tao was dissatisfied with Su Xingchuan’s performance. As they left the restaurant, he scolded, “Why did you choose to have the surgery now, of all times? The Zhongjin project is at a critical stage. You weren’t there, and now Xu Zhengdong’s attitude has changed. All our efforts are wasted.”
What did Xu Zhengdong’s change of attitude have to do with him?
Su Xingchuan felt annoyed but could only smile and apologize. “It was my mistake. I should have briefed the team better. But there’s still a chance with Mr. Xu; it just needs a bit more time.”
Yan Tao scoffed. “The news I’ve heard is that Zhongjin’s board will undergo a major reshuffle next month. With Xu Zhengdong showing no progress now, how much time do you think you have left?”
Su Xingchuan frowned.
Managers always shift blame first.
He had worked himself into illness, but in Yan Tao’s narrative, it became “he delayed work due to surgery”—harsh and completely lacking in empathy.
He made no promises, only stating that he’d do his best. Yan Tao noticed his unhappy expression and, losing interest, got into his car and drove off.
Su Xingchuan hadn’t driven. With the warmth from the alcohol and his mind racing, the cool breeze through the leaves felt refreshing, so he decided to walk home instead of calling a cab. Eventually, he found himself in front of Zhongjin’s headquarters.
Zhongjin, a massive real estate company.
Xu Zhengdong was its leader.
Su Xingchuan couldn’t stand him. Although Xu Zhengdong was only thirty-seven or thirty-eight, he constantly acted like a senior, often looking down at him with a condescending gaze.
He looked up at the towering skyscraper.
It meant nothing to him.
He glanced up at the night sky, which was dark and scattered with a few dim stars. As he lowered his gaze, he saw something unexpected—a Cullinan parked not far away.
It was Xu Zhengdong’s car; he recognized it.
Xu Zhengdong stepped out, standing by the car with an unusually gentle smile. He gestured towards someone in the distance.
Following Xu Zhengdong’s gaze, Su Xingchuan saw Li Xuan.
For a moment, he thought he was mistaken, but when he looked again, it was indeed Li Xuan.
Li Xuan was wearing a long black coat, carrying a backpack, and walked slowly toward Xu Zhengdong, who immediately reached out to take his bag and spoke to him with a smile, his manner completely different from how he had treated Su Xingchuan earlier that day.
Li Xuan’s expression remained neutral as he nodded and got into the car. Xu Zhengdong walked around to the other side and entered the vehicle.
The car doors closed.
A roar sounded in Su Xingchuan’s ears, and everything around him seemed frozen.
—
As soon as Li Xuan got into the car, he took out his phone.
Su Xingchuan hadn’t messaged him all day.
The conversation remained from the day before when Su Xingchuan had asked if he could sleep on his side, and Li Xuan had replied that it was fine.
Staring at his last message, he regretted using such a cold tone.
He should have asked, How do you usually sleep? That way, the conversation could have continued.
Xu Zhengdong placed Li Xuan’s bag in the back seat and noticed his forlorn expression. “Xiao Xuan, are you in love? You’ve seemed distracted lately.”
Li Xuan shook his head.
“Talk to your uncle; I can give you advice.”
“No need.” Li Xuan kept his eyes on his phone.
Though his tone was harsh, Xu Zhengdong wasn’t bothered.
Li Xuan had been born prematurely and had spent a month in the ICU after birth, fragile like a delicate porcelain doll. The entire family had always doted on and protected him.
Xu Zhengdong’s affection for him wasn’t just because they were uncle and nephew. Li Xuan’s premature birth had partly been his fault. In his rebellious youth, when his sister was seven months pregnant, he got into a gang fight and seriously injured someone. His sister was so distressed by the news that she experienced severe abdominal pain that night, resulting in Li Xuan’s early birth.
Xu Zhengdong had always felt guilty towards his sister and nephew.
No matter how authoritative he was in front of others, he always humbled himself before Li Xuan.
And as someone who preferred men, Xu Zhengdong had noticed signs of Li Xuan’s similar inclinations from age fifteen or sixteen.
Li Xuan’s mother blamed Xu Zhengdong entirely, believing he had influenced Li Xuan. Whether that was true, Xu Zhengdong could only treat Li Xuan as well as possible to shield him from external harm.
Seven years ago, Li Xuan had returned home in tears, locking himself in his room for two or three days. His family was anxious, only to learn much later that the boy had had his heart broken.
Xu Zhengdong offered, “I’ll take you to find him.”
Li Xuan cried and shook his head, refusing to discuss it further.
The matter was left unresolved.
Over time, Li Xuan matured, completed his studies, and returned to work at the hospital. He was no longer the spoiled and willful boy he once was.
His parents were finally at ease.
But Xu Zhengdong sensed that things weren’t so simple.
Watching Li Xuan’s downcast expression, Xu sighed. “Still thinking about your first love? It’s been years. Let me tell you, first loves aren’t as perfect as you think. Time just puts a filter on them, making them unforgettable. If it’s not meant to be, it’s better not to dwell on it.”
Not meant to be—the cruelest four words.
Li Xuan’s mood sank further.
As the car slowly drove out of Zhongjin’s gates, Li Xuan gazed out the window and suddenly saw a familiar figure.
He immediately sat up straight.
Xu Zhengdong continued, “I recently met a guy your age. He works in investment banking, and he’s got a nice personality—”
“Stop the car!” Li Xuan interrupted.
“Huh?”
Li Xuan pounded on the back of the front seat. “Stop the car!”
The driver began to slow down, and as soon as the car halted, Li Xuan opened the door and jumped out, shouting, “Uncle, go on without me. There’s an emergency at the hospital.”
“I’ll take you there!” Xu Zhengdong called after him.
But Li Xuan had already sprinted off.
Xu Zhengdong muttered, “What kind of emergency could be so urgent?”
—
Su Xingchuan was still rooted to the spot.
Something inside him had shattered.
He should have felt relieved that someone was there for Li Xuan.
Seeing Xu Zhengdong’s doting behavior, he felt like he was watching a version of himself from years ago. Li Xuan always had a way of making people care for him.
Li Xuan had someone to look after him, a stable job, and a happy life.
He had his own career and life too.
Everyone was moving forward.
He should take this as a sign to finally let go of Li Xuan.
He should let go…
But the pain in his chest was suffocating, spreading through his entire body like an electric shock. He couldn’t stay calm. Taking a step back, he collapsed onto a roadside barrier.
The next second, Li Xuan stood before him.
Li Xuan’s pointed chin was hidden beneath the collar of his black coat. He looked down at Su Xingchuan, the streetlamp behind casting light that obscured Li Xuan’s eyes.
Staring into his clear, black-and-white eyes, their gazes locked, and neither looked away.
A honk from the street broke the silence, snapping Su Xingchuan back to reality.
He glanced toward the intersection; Xu Zhengdong’s Cullinan was gone.
His breathing grew heavy.
Li Xuan spoke first, “Did you drink?”
Even when he frowned, he looked beautiful.
“Just a bit—social gathering,” he said sheepishly.
Li Xuan’s tone was sharp. “Barely three days after surgery, and you’re already drinking? Do you think you’re still young enough to act recklessly, Su Xingchuan?”
There was real concern in his voice.
Su Xingchuan lazily asked, “In what capacity are you worried about me? As my doctor or as my ex?”
Li Xuan was at a loss for words.
“If it’s as a doctor, then thank you, Dr. Li. I’ll be careful. I’ll come to the hospital in a few days to have the stent removed,” he said, his face suddenly turning cold. “But if it’s as my ex, there’s no need. We broke up seven years ago.”
They had only been together for a little over four months, from summer to winter.
Hearing this, Li Xuan’s expression dimmed, and he took a step back.
Su Xingchuan tried to stand up; he didn’t want to face Li Xuan or think about Xu Zhengdong’s manner earlier.
Even though Xu Zhengdong was older, he was still handsome, sophisticated, and a company executive. Compared to Xu Zhengdong, what did he have?
His prized Mercedes GLC, worth a little over 400,000, had taken him months to decide to buy. It wasn’t even a fraction of the price of Xu’s Cullinan.
To make things worse, the same CEO who had been difficult with him for two months was his ex’s current boyfriend.
Reality was harsh.
He couldn’t compete, and he felt dejected.
He hadn’t properly rested post-surgery, suffering sleepless nights from the pain. On top of that, he’d had a drink tonight. When he stood, blood rushed to his head, and he stumbled backward.
Li Xuan immediately caught his arm.
The sudden closeness brought them face-to-face, and with just a slight tilt, he could have kissed Li Xuan’s forehead.
He wanted to kiss him—he’d dreamed of it.
Even after he steadied himself, Li Xuan didn’t let go.
“Where do you live? I’ll—” Li Xuan hesitated, then corrected himself. “What’s your boyfriend’s number? I’ll call him to pick you up.”
“My boyfriend doesn’t live with me,” he slurred, leaning into the intoxication. “Dr. Li, can you take me home?”
“Fine,” Li Xuan replied.
Surprised, he blinked.
Just minutes ago, Li Xuan had gotten into Xu Zhengdong’s car.
He no longer cared about their relationship. Li Xuan had already flagged down a taxi, ushering him inside before taking a seat beside him.
“Where do you live?” Li Xuan asked.
“Xincheng Residence, East Gate.”
Li Xuan relayed the address to the driver, and the car started moving.
For the twenty-minute ride, they sat side by side in silence, separated by a small gap. Occasionally, when the car turned, their shoulders brushed.
Staring out the window, he kept an eye on Li Xuan from the corner of his eye.
The late-night taxi ride reminded him of the first time they stayed out together years ago.
Back then, Li Xuan had tried to woo him, pretending to be experienced. But when things got serious, he chickened out. They’d booked a hotel in the city center, and on the ride from school to the hotel, Li Xuan had sat quietly, lips pressed tight.
He had quietly held Li Xuan’s hand, slipping his fingers into his clenched fist, lightly scratching his palm.
Li Xuan, as if finally letting down his guard, gripped his hand, then leaned over, resting his head against his chest.
He didn’t care if the driver noticed; he snuggled up to him, gazing up with an innocent look, trying to rest his legs on his lap. But Su Xingchuan had pushed them down gently, whispering, “Sit properly.”
Li Xuan pouted, and Su Xingchuan kissed him in resignation.
Two minutes later, Li Xuan started misbehaving again, brushing his leg against his. Feeling his grip tighten, Li Xuan smiled triumphantly, continuing to cuddle.
Back then, they were inseparable.
But now?
They both sat motionless, a gulf between them.
The driver braked sharply a few times, and Su Xingchuan instinctively raised his arm to protect Li Xuan’s chest. Li Xuan stared at his hand, about to speak, but Su Xingchuan pulled his hand back, realizing the gesture was unnecessary.
They soon arrived at the complex’s gate.
As they walked in, he didn’t ask Li Xuan if he wanted to come up. He didn’t want to hear a refusal.
He continued walking, his steps a little unsteady.
The landscaping was nice, with many trees adorned with colorful lights. Li Xuan paused, captivated by the snowflake-shaped lights above, looking up.
Seeing Li Xuan stop, he thought he was unwilling to go further, and his heart skipped a beat.
Slowly turning back, he saw Li Xuan gazing at the changing colors of the snowflake lights, his side profile as familiar as ever.
The panic melted away, and he felt the blood flow through his body again.
Thankfully, Li Xuan hadn’t left.
Deciding to take a chance, he faced the truth.
No fancy reason—he just wanted to take Li Xuan home.
