Xie Liang quickly left the room.
Su Xingchuan felt completely drained.
Li Xuan coldly instructed, “Don’t move. Just bear with it a little longer.”
As Su Xingchuan let out a sharp gasp, the stent was finally removed. His grip on the edge of the bed relaxed, and he felt as though his body no longer belonged to him.
“It’s done,” Li Xuan said.
After enduring the initial pain, surgery, post-surgery blood in the urine, and two rounds of catheter removal, Su Xingchuan’s journey through urology had finally reached a turning point.
Li Xuan set aside the instruments.
Su Xingchuan asked, “Were you really not taking your anger out on me?”
He panted as he sat up, his hands still trembling as he gripped the bed, taking a long time to steady himself and fix his clothes.
Li Xuan, his back turned as he removed his gloves, replied indifferently, “It’ll still hurt for a few days. The precautions are the same as before.”
He was probably still upset because of Xie Liang.
He seemed as cold as an eternal iceberg.
It was hard to believe that he used to be so clingy.
Su Xingchuan thought, If only time could turn back. If I called out his name like before, he would turn around and run to me, throwing himself into my arms, looking up at me with those bright eyes that saw only me. The Li Xuan back then was so adorable—nothing like now.
“Dr. Li, have you had lunch?”
Su Xingchuan asked, already knowing the answer. Without waiting for a response, he continued, “I wanted to thank you for taking care of me all this time. I was hoping to treat you to a meal. Would you honor me with your company?”
“No need. I’ll call in your companion to help you.”
He emphasized the word companion deliberately.
As he passed by Su Xingchuan, Su Xingchuan suddenly grabbed him, pulling him between his legs—just like the night before.
Li Xuan immediately struggled, trying to break free. Su Xingchuan whispered, “I’m in pain.”
He didn’t specify whether it was physical or emotional pain.
Li Xuan’s chest heaved, but he forced himself to stay calm. “Your boyfriend is still outside.”
“When did you become so obedient?”
Li Xuan turned his head away, refusing to speak.
Su Xingchuan chuckled softly, “Weren’t you the one who used to love these kinds of thrills the most? You were so bold when you were teasing me.”
Li Xuan couldn’t bear Su Xingchuan’s taunts and managed to free himself from his grip. He returned to his desk, took a deep breath, and called the next patient.
The electronic prompt sounded outside:
“Patient 11 for Urology, please proceed to Consultation Room 3.”
The announcement signaled the next patient’s turn and reminded Su Xingchuan that, at that moment, he was merely a patient to Li Xuan. Not wanting to delay Li Xuan’s work, Su Xingchuan lingered by the door for a few seconds, debating whether to explain his relationship with Xie Liang. In the end, he gave up.
As soon as he stepped out, the next patient entered.
Xie Lang was on the phone with his fiancée, and not wanting to interrupt, Su Xingchuan sat on a bench by the entrance, rubbing his temples.
So tired.
All he wanted now was a good sleep.
In all the years since their breakup, Su Xingchuan felt like he had never had a truly restful sleep.
He suddenly remembered their first New Year’s Eve together. When he came out of the bathroom, Li Xuan was already asleep.
Damp from his shower, he got into bed and wrapped his arms around Li Xuan, pulling him into his embrace. Li Xuan, half-awake, turned over and hugged Su Xingchuan like a little koala, using his arm as a pillow. He found the most comfortable position and soon fell back asleep. Fireworks sparkled outside, and the big screen played the countdown. At midnight, Su Xingchuan kissed Li Xuan’s forehead and whispered, “Happy New Year, baby.”
Back then, he never worried about insomnia.
Xie Lang finished his call with his fiancée and turned to Su Xingchuan. “Finished already? Can you walk?”
Su Xingchuan glared at him.
Xie Lang, shamelessly, grinned. “See? I knew you still care about him.”
Su Xingchuan stood up. “Let’s go.”
“I’ll take you home first. I have to go to my in-laws’ later to discuss wedding arrangements.”
“Finally getting married?”
“Yeah, after two years of pressure from our parents.”
“Why didn’t you want to get married?”
“Mainly because we don’t want kids. Neither of us likes children or wants that responsibility,” Xie Lang sighed. “But it’s just to make our parents happy.”
Su Xingchuan smiled helplessly.
“Do your parents still pressure you to get married?” Xie Lang asked.
“Sometimes.”
“Your mom still doesn’t believe you like men?”
Leaning against the elevator wall, Su Xingchuan shook his head. “But I don’t think I like men, either. I just… like him.”
It wasn’t an exaggeration.
After breaking up with Li Xuan, Su Xingchuan had struggled. He couldn’t figure out his orientation anymore—he had lost interest in women, but he didn’t feel anything for men either, even those who resembled Li Xuan.
When people asked about his orientation, he would vaguely say, “I just haven’t met the right person.”
But he knew the truth—there was no such person. Li Xuan had taken up that space in his heart and would occupy it permanently.
Three years ago, his mother had found a stack of Polaroid photos in his room—photos of him and Li Xuan, showing an intimacy that was undeniable. When she asked if he liked men, he had answered, “Yes.”
She didn’t believe him. “Don’t say that. You just haven’t met the right girl yet. Give it time.”
The right girl…
At ten years old, Su Xingchuan never would have imagined that he’d be sleeping with a man ten years later. Li Xuan had turned his life upside down, then walked away without a second thought.
Xie Lang lamented, “In a world like this, why play the lovesick fool? You’re wasting time and wasting your good looks.”
Su Xingchuan smiled faintly and sighed.
“Then let it be wasted.”
.
After getting home, Su Xingchuan cooked himself some porridge. Half-full, he lay down on his bed.
His boss called, asking about the Zhongjin situation.
The mere mention of the name annoyed him. “Boss Yan, there’s nothing new with Zhongjin right now.”
“Xiao Su, I’ve noticed your attitude towards work has really declined since your surgery,” Yan’s tone was sharp, as usual.
Su Xingchuan felt irritated. “Boss Yan, the Zhongjin project was difficult from the start. You told me to give it my best, and that if I couldn’t secure it, it would be fine. But now that there’s a glimmer of hope, you start criticizing me as if it was always yours to take, as if not landing Zhongjin is my failure. You haven’t once acknowledged all the time and effort I’ve put in. What’s the point of this?”
Yan was momentarily stunned.
“Are you losing your mind?”
Xie Lang had been right—since reuniting with Li Xuan, Su Xingchuan had changed.
His calm, controlled, and diplomatic nature had disappeared. With Li Xuan’s reappearance, he felt like he was back to his impulsive, twenty-year-old self—full of clarity in his likes and dislikes, unburdened, and not always weighing things based on benefits.
“Sorry, Boss Yan. I haven’t been well lately, and my mental state isn’t great. To be honest, I don’t want to work on the Zhongjin project anymore, and I don’t want to deal with Xu Zhengdong.”
Yan nearly slammed his desk in anger. “Zhongjin’s board meeting is approaching, and you’re pulling this now!”
Su Xingchuan felt a throbbing in his temple.
“Zhou Jing wants this project more than you. Fine, I’ll hand it over to him and have more peace of mind.”
Zhou Jing was Su Xingchuan’s biggest rival at the company.
Since Su Xingchuan had started working on the Zhongjin project, Zhou Jing had been making underhanded moves—spreading rumors, poaching, whispering into Yan’s ear. Su Xingchuan despised such people and didn’t want to waste time on him. But in the end, Zhou Jing was getting the project.
Su Xingchuan could already imagine Zhou Jing’s smug face.
Fine, let him have it.
He had no intention of bowing down to a romantic rival.
He was still young, capable, and didn’t need this job to survive.
Yan hung up furiously, but Su Xingchuan was glad for the peace. He put down his phone and tried to get some sleep.
But he couldn’t.
No matter how much he tossed and turned, he couldn’t fall asleep. His mind was restless.
Late at night, he couldn’t resist sending Li Xuan a message: [Dr. Li, I forgot when my follow-up appointment is.]
It was just an excuse to talk.
Li Xuan didn’t reply.
Su Xingchuan felt a surge of jealousy, wondering if he was with Xu Zhengdong.
Impulsively, he called.
The call was answered quickly.
Just as he was about to speak, he heard a noise in the background—like a bar, with intermittent music.
“Li Xuan?”
A male voice replied, “Hello, sir. This gentleman is drunk at our bar. Could you come and pick him up?”
Li Xuan, at a bar, drunk.
Without hesitation, Su Xingchuan replied, “Yes, please take care of him. I’ll be there right away.”
He got the address and rushed there, his heart racing with worry.
Why would Li Xuan go to such a chaotic place like a bar?
Once he arrived, he hurried inside and found Li Xuan asleep in a booth.
Li Xuan, the professional and serious Dr. Li at the hospital, always gave Su Xingchuan a sense of distance. But here, in such a disordered place, Li Xuan curled up in a booth, wrapped in a large white coat, looking small and vulnerable—just like a child.
Su Xingchuan approached and touched his face.
“Li Xuan?”
Li Xuan didn’t respond.
Su Xingchuan leaned closer, rubbing Li Xuan’s earlobe, like he used to when waking him up. “Baby?”
Li Xuan’s furrowed brow suddenly relaxed, and he instinctively snuggled into Su Xingchuan’s hand, seeking warmth and comfort as he leaned into Su Xingchuan’s embrace.
Su Xingchuan felt his heart skip a beat.
It was as if something deep within him clicked back into place.
He immediately hugged him.
But this wasn’t the place to sleep—reeking of alcohol, chaotic.
“Baby, wake up.” He shook Li Xuan’s arm.
Li Xuan didn’t want to wake up. When the bar switched to a heavy metal track, the loud noise startled him, and he burrowed further into Su Xingchuan’s arms—just like he used to.
Su Xingchuan loved how Li Xuan would cling to him, full of trust. He scooped Li Xuan up in his arms.
People glanced their way, but he didn’t care.
The bartender helped open the car door, and Su Xingchuan carefully placed Li Xuan inside, thanking him.
The entire process was seamless.
But once inside, he felt the strain.
Seven years ago, he could’ve carried Li Xuan effortlessly. But now, having just undergone surgery and still recovering from a fever, he felt weak. The pain hit him as he sat in the car, and he had to take a moment to gather himself.
Lucky Li Xuan is drunk, he thought.
Li Xuan groaned.
Su Xingchuan cupped his face, “What’s wrong?”
Li Xuan continued to mumble.
He was a natural at seeking comfort, even while drunk.
Su Xingchuan fastened his seatbelt and muttered, “Taking it out on me like that, making it hurt so much. You have to take responsibility, Dr. Li.”
Dr. Li slept peacefully, ignoring him.
Su Xingchuan pinched his cheek.
The night was dark, and the streets were nearly empty. It was late December, with the cold wind biting. The trees along the street had lost all their leaves.
Su Xingchuan didn’t start the car right away. He sat in the driver’s seat, quietly watching Li Xuan.
Li Xuan’s features hadn’t changed much in seven years, except the baby fat was gone, and his features were sharper, giving him a cooler look. But when he was asleep, he was still like a little kitten.
A beautiful ragdoll cat—adorable even when it scratched.
Su Xingchuan could never get enough of looking at him.
The clock on the dashboard read midnight. It was time to take Li Xuan home.
Take him home? No chance.
